Housewarming gift price range?

[NoCanoe]

I originally offered to buy a gift once my friends were settled and knew what they wanted. There had been talk of wanting to replace dinner plates, bed linen , towels etc.

They now have said they will forgo the non essential items in favour of something more practical.

That's fine. But because I never stipulated a budget at the time when it was a general idea, Im now being presented with an invoice far greater than anticipated.

Im just wondering if Im out of touch with price range these days, or am I being taken advantage of?

Id like some idea of what you'd consider normal price range before I say how much I am actually being asked for.

I do feel I have no option but to honour the commitment. But I'm a bit miffed.

To answer some questions, we do normally swap gifts, but nothing too expensive from their side.

Ive given more due to a special birthday, significant anniversary being involved.

And in terms of moral support and such things, thats been more me as well due to having particular knowledge which has been useful to them on occasions.

Yay! Well done OP!

Stand your ground if you get anything back other than an apology from them for their cheek.

Even £100 is generous.

I've just found this thread this morning and was so glad to skip to the end and see you've told them (very politely) to get stuffed.

I am myself the recipient of housewarming curtains but a) they were from my parents, b) they specifically offered and sent me links to some they thought I would like and c) they weren't made to measure and so cost nothing like £500! Gifts from and to friends have always been along the lines of flowers and booze.

Thank goodness your common sense and self esteem have prevailed!! I can't help but think your initial response should have been "£550? Are you on glue?"

Please think of the things that would please YOU to do with YOUR money - spunking it (sorry ) on your soon to be CF user ex-friends is not one of them.......

I wouldn't even give them the £100 now.

Cheeky fuckers.

Ahh after reading this all through, I'm so, so pleased that you have sent a message to them saying £550 is too much! £100 is incredibly generous, although too much in my opinion. Please do let us know what their response is.

Well done OP.

I suspect their reaction will tell you a lot!

You are far too nice for your own good op.

They will be gnashing their teeth at your response but won’t want to jeopardise not getting the £100.

As my mother would call them - What ghastly people!

Glad you didn’t pay the full demand and I hope you can now reevaluate your friendship which basically isn’t a friendship as they have been using you.

Well done OP even the amount you've offered is more than most people would expect so please remember you are not in the wrong if it does kick off. Hopefully it won't and they'll realise they've been out of order.

£20 for a housewarming would be my max
If someone invoiced me It would go straight in the bin.

I would say about £20 max.
House plant. Biscuit barrel and biscuits. Flowers and a vase. Alcohol and box of choc. Family or friends picture frame with photo.

My guess is they will push back because they have form for manipulating you into giving them money. I really hope you can get rid of these leeches. £100 is far too much. A foodbank could make better use out of it. 'Given your response and the way you've hounded me to extort money, I feel really used so I'm not handing you any more money.'

Yep, £20 max here too. Don’t give in just for a quiet life, they sound like total users.

Good for you Op. £100 is more than generous.

Even the wording of your reply seems weird. 'I knew you wanted something from me'.

Does that mean they suggested you got them a House warming gift in the first place, rather than an offer 'I'd like to get you a house warming gift?

Def time to kick back with these CFers.

Birdie - they better off than me. And they aware I have expensive outlays.

This makes it all the more weird, not to mention unpleasant for you.

Glad you've contacted them though.

First home for close friends or family - up to £30. Other friends & family = nice plant / bunch flowers (up to £10).

Either way your friendship won't be the same.

I think I'd rather keep the £550 and send them a plant or the £100 if you still wanted to as that was what you had decided on in the first place

Good for you OP standing up to them, total CFs.

EdtheBear - It started when I asked what she would like for Christmas. She said she wanted nothing, but I could get them a house warming gift when they had moved and settled in. Thats where dinner plates, new towels etc came into the conversation.

It was very casual and was left open ended as it was supposed to be a treat item. Then , it was mentioned , once they moved in, that really they needed more essential stuff. Again, left open ended, nothing specified at all as they were still working on what they needed etc.

It was all very general.

Well done OP! I'm proud of you💐

You could do this very politely and send a reply note with an offer to transfer over gbp 100 or so you were thinking of with no acknowledgement of their requested amount.

'Dear friend, for your housewarming, here is a cheque for gbp 100. I believe if will go some way towards the new curtains. Enjoy!'

😃

Your too nice for these people,glad u diddnt give in and give the full amount,hope they are feeling ashamed of themself.

Ive had a reply.

All it says is....What do you mean, Lost in Translation?

Thats it.

So you reply.
"You seem to have sent me a 'demand' for hundreds of ££. Originally, this housewarming was due to be instead of your Christmas present, and you know we normally spend £X on each other. That is what I was offering. I have no idea where you have got the idea I have £500+ spare to be decorating your new house "