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Original poster

Housewarming gift price range?

835 replies

NoCanoe · 13/04/2019 17:10

I originally offered to buy a gift once my friends were settled and knew what they wanted. There had been talk of wanting to replace dinner plates, bed linen , towels etc.

They now have said they will forgo the non essential items in favour of something more practical.

That's fine. But because I never stipulated a budget at the time when it was a general idea, Im now being presented with an invoice far greater than anticipated.

Im just wondering if Im out of touch with price range these days, or am I being taken advantage of?

Id like some idea of what you'd consider normal price range before I say how much I am actually being asked for.

I do feel I have no option but to honour the commitment. But I'm a bit miffed.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
6
Londongirl888 · 14/04/2019 00:40

Really you can just decline. Dear cheeky friends. I am astounded you would put pressure on me and abuse my kindness for an extortionate amount of money for a housewarming gift. It is normally acceptable for a plant, wine, glasses. Toaster, bin etc which I was happy to help you with . I trust you will understand that presently I am hurt and do not feel comfortable contributing. I wish you well in your new venture. Then BLOCK.

Original poster
NoCanoe · 14/04/2019 00:40

It was years ago, Alpaca, and i didn't really take too much notice at the time.

But I've ended up trawling through our history, and as I've said, its not pretty.

Yes, I've been dim. Never thought I had to be that alert or question my friend.

Its a horrible feeling.

OP posts:
NaturatintGoldenChestnut · 14/04/2019 00:45

I think I'd go with just blocking them because any response you give them other than transferring them money will be exploited. Do you have anyone in real life you can tell, too? I'd flip if I found out someone was doing this to someone I know.

Interested in this thread?

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Events & celebrations General shopping
Erksum · 14/04/2019 00:46

OP
I know I need to deal with it tomorrow

Why on earth do you want to wait until tomorrow. Reply now and end the drama and all the anguish. Send them whatever it is you want to send them and forget about it.

You are giving this a ridiculous amount of thought. Every reply on here has said you would be daft to pay so why would you drag it out. You can't think anyone is going to say anything different.

AlpacaPicnicc · 14/04/2019 00:52

It all just seems really dramatic

Surely a simple ' I cannot afford that in its entirety but I'd be happy to make a sum towards it of xyz' will suffice

Original poster
NoCanoe · 14/04/2019 00:54

Thank you all for your down to earth advice. Its made me feel that I was the sane one in the scenario afterall!!

I needed the virtual grabbing of shoulders and being shaken!

I'll pay the £100 as id planned. But no more.

OP posts:
AlpacaPicnicc · 14/04/2019 00:57

Very sensible!

Original poster
NoCanoe · 14/04/2019 00:58

I felt id been punched alpaca ,which probably explains why its 'dramatic'.
It has been to me.

As I've freely admitted, I'm a fucking numpty.

OP posts:
dreichuplands · 14/04/2019 00:58

OP I have just read through what complete CF's they are, amongst the worse I have read on Mumsnet.
Do not pay for the curtains, do not worry about this all night. Send them a message like,
Dear CF's I hope you are happily settled in your new house and enclose my 100 pound contribution towards the curtains. I hope you enjoy them.
No canoe

NaturatintGoldenChestnut · 14/04/2019 01:02

PLEASE cut these people off! You pay them £100 and they will continue to harass, hound, manipulate and exploit you until you part with more because they are con artists.

woolduvet · 14/04/2019 01:16

I like londongirls reply. Send it now and turn your phone off and have a good nights sleep without the worry.

Palominoo · 14/04/2019 01:49

No to paying £100.00.

That’s silly. You’ve now realised they are not true friends.

Why give them even a penny?

Palominoo · 14/04/2019 01:51

Do you have any mutual friends?

I’m curious as to how much they have been done for?

aytheweeun · 14/04/2019 02:13

Dear god how are you even considering paying this!!

FloofyDoof · 14/04/2019 02:26

I wouldn't give them anything at all after that, how horrible! They're no friend. Save the money and get yourself something nice instead, and tell the piss taking gits to buy their own bloody curtains.

In my world a housewarming gift is generally something like a bottle of wine and a pot plant picked up from sainsburys on the way to the party. And it certainly wouldn't be expected or demanded like that either.

EdtheBear · 14/04/2019 02:41

Op they are taking the piss.

Dear Friends,
Sorry but £550 is far more than I am willing to gift for a housewarming. If your unable to fund your own curtains I suggest you cancel them asap and hopefully get your deposit refunded.

You could offer, £50 towards the curtains or say you'll get a wee surprise delivered (by online shopping) or by a charity gift Oxfam goat in their name.

Please don't be taken for a mug. If you really want to give money I'm sure a local Easter egg collection, food bank or similar will be much more grateful and deserving of your cash.

BasiliskStare · 14/04/2019 02:59

@NoCanoe - £550 when not agreed is completely unreasonable.

Please please listen to other posters and just transfer whatever you had originally thought of as a contribution towards a housewarming present . Plus Wink a deduction for your time to get a bit cross - Ah I am not serious about that. But - a short note to say you hope they got them interlined ? Grin

I hope you do not have a holiday house in mexico ( was that the cheekiest of cheeky people thread ? )

Best wishes @Nocanoe - Just transfer what you were thinking of and not a jot more - It is nice to be generous - it is not nice when people take advantage.

GinZing · 14/04/2019 03:19

I think £100 is a lot, particularly considering their CFery.

Poppins2016 · 14/04/2019 03:50

*No to paying £100.00.

That’s silly. You’ve now realised they are not true friends.

Why give them even a penny?*

100% agree with this. You decide how to spend your money. It's not a debt or a bill. It's a gift (which the CFs don't deserve)! Will you consider them friends after this? If not, don't give anything.

Poppins2016 · 14/04/2019 03:57

P.s. Ask yourself whether your 'friends' would pay for a present like this for you. I suspect the answer will be no.

purplepears · 14/04/2019 05:19

Who are these people? Family? Friends?
Please don't transfer any money till you've had a response to your offer this morning. If they are unpleasant don't send anything.
You sound so lovely and kind. Use that kindness and energy on people that give you respect and love.
They are bullying you.

Snog · 14/04/2019 06:19

Text back that you were thinking £30

BiscuitDrama · 14/04/2019 07:15

Please don’t give £100. It’s just too much.

jay55 · 14/04/2019 07:18

You know we're all going to shout at you that 100 is too much.

Block them and forget them.

wittyusermane · 14/04/2019 07:41

WTF?! Shock That is some high level CFery!! £550 is completely insane.

Shame they didn't ok the quote with you before ordering them; that surely would have been the obvious thing to do given they apparently need the money from you pronto.

£100 is more than generous for a housewarming gift so send it as a contribution and be done with it. If they are anything but grateful and gracious then they truly aren't worth having as friends anyway.