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Original poster

I am being ridiculous please talk me down

83 replies

theweeenglishfella · 09/04/2019 09:26

I just returned from dropping my DS at nursery and as I was crossing the (busy) road to get to my flat a man in a car with tinted windows slowed down and started staring at me. I didn't make eye contact, just looked down and carried on walking. He sped off and drove away but then two seconds later I saw him turn around and drive so he was pulling up alongside me and continued to stare. He had to move on as there were cars behind him so I went into my flat but then when I looked out of the window two minutes later I saw he'd got out of his car and was looking up and down the street. Couldn't see his car, he must have parked it.

Anyway now I'm really freaked out. Need to go back out for shopping but feel worried he's still lurking, though I can't see him any more.

Being ridiculous I know. I had an absolutely horrible traumatic experience a couple of months ago which started out a bit like this so I'm on edge.

Talk me down?

OP posts:
MrsGideon · 09/04/2019 09:28

You're not being ridiculous OP, that's really creepy. I don't have any advice I'm afraid but I hope you're ok x

SparklyMagpie · 09/04/2019 09:30

You are absolutely not being ridiculous. I'm not sure what to advise, could a friend come round or come shopping with you?

BlueMerchant · 09/04/2019 09:32

Could thisan in some way be connected to the traumatic event? If so get help now.
I'd ask a friend/family member to come shopping with you. Make sure you are not alone today.

BlueMerchant · 09/04/2019 09:32

this man

Original poster
theweeenglishfella · 09/04/2019 09:32

I don't know anyone who'd be free, they're all at work (I WFH).

I don't think he knows what flat I went into.

This sort of thing keeps happening to me. I'm starting to think I'm giving off some kind of creepy man signals.

OP posts:
Roxybaby12 · 09/04/2019 09:33

Oh you poor thing! That’s horrible!!
Don’t ignore this! Write everything down-all the details!! Times, places and discription of the guy and his car!! It’s really important that you contact the police ASAP!! You have a young child to care for! You must report this even if you think it’s nothing!
Sorry not trying to frighten you but please please report him! Am worried about your safety! Keep me posted. Xx

JollyAndBright · 09/04/2019 09:33

You are definitely not being ridiculous.

Can you avoid going out for a while?
Or call a friend to come with you.

Original poster
theweeenglishfella · 09/04/2019 09:35

I have literally no faith whatsoever in the police tbh. I was sexually assaulted a couple of months back and they didn't even bother to investigate.

OP posts:
Original poster
theweeenglishfella · 09/04/2019 09:36

Should have got his reg number really but I was just so desparate to get into my flat. Don't even know what kind of car it was other than it was black.

OP posts:
KaterinaPetrova · 09/04/2019 09:36

Is he still outside? I would ring 101 for advice. If they have someone free they might do a drive by for you (we are in an area where you can get the community police out rather quickly)

I would certainly invest in a personal attack alarm for the future because this sounds very unnerving.

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JaneEyre07 · 09/04/2019 09:36

If he's still out there, photograph him. And report to 101.

I saw a man doing this to a very attractive young mum with a baby in a car park a few weeks ago.... he drove round her about 4 times, then when she went walking off, he was slowly following her. I was so concerned that I got out of my car and shouted after her and I was really cross at myself for not taking a photo and reporting him .....

He may have thought you were someone else so I wouldn't panic too much, and like you say, he didn't see which flat you went into. But I'd still report it if you can give many details.

breadzeb · 09/04/2019 09:37

I would assume he was looking for an address and wasn't staring at you but towards the property beside you

Original poster
theweeenglishfella · 09/04/2019 09:37

No, I can't see him but he might be down the side road where I think he was parked.

OP posts:
Original poster
theweeenglishfella · 09/04/2019 09:38

No he was definitely staring at me, breadzeb. Trust me. I know when I'm being stared at.

OP posts:
Palominoo · 09/04/2019 09:38

Was he definitely looking at you and not at the buildings the other side of you?

I asked a man what he wanted as I thought he was kerb crawling me and he was quite startled and was looking for a particular address that wasn’t clearly numbered.

If you think he was acting menacing towards you then call the police.

whitesoxx · 09/04/2019 09:38

I also think he might be looking for an address. You felt he was staring at you but he could've been looking for a house/flat number since you didn't look directly at him?

Palominoo · 09/04/2019 09:38

Sorry cross post.

BlueMerchant · 09/04/2019 09:38

The fact this kind of thing keeps happening to you is definitely worrying.
This is likely totally wrong but could someone have posted you on a site or something?. I don't wish to make you paranoid but it's strange. I would probably think about police if this is something that you suspect.
My other thought is could this recent traumatic event be causing you to be EXTRA vigilant. Could the man have been looking for someone else in your vicinity and had maybe lost address or was thinking of stopping and asking you?

augustusglupe · 09/04/2019 09:41

Don’t ignore it OP, you’re instinct will be right. For the moment I would just be very vigilant and as others have said, write down anything odd that happens.
In my experience ‘Creeps’ are not few and far between, they’re bloody everywhere!

Ilovemysleepthief · 09/04/2019 09:41

Sounds very scary, I would phone the non emergency police

Original poster
theweeenglishfella · 09/04/2019 09:42

There's genuinely no point calling the police, what are they going to do? His car isn't there any more, and I don't have the reg number or even the make. His description will fit a million other men in this area.

Obviously if I see him again then I will call them but there isn't much they can do on what information I have.

I'm not paranoid, I know he was a creep.

OP posts:
Aus84 · 09/04/2019 09:42

This happens all the time in my street as the house numbering is a bit complicated. You said he had tinted windows and you didn't make eye contact, just looked down, yet you're certain he was staring directly at you?

Aus84 · 09/04/2019 09:44

Sorry that sounded like I was doubting you!!

Original poster
theweeenglishfella · 09/04/2019 09:44

Yes, he was crawling along the kerb staring directly at me. Just because I didn't make eye contact doesn't mean I didn't look at him.

He had the front window rolled down, he rolled it down when he slowed down to stare. All the windows were tinted.

OP posts:
breadzeb · 09/04/2019 09:47

In the nicest possible way, what are you looking for people to say OP?

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