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Dd 11 being mean to ds age 5, caught on camera

78 replies

Lardlizard · 10/03/2019 21:09

So me and dh were doing some work in the garden only for 30 mins

We let the dc play on a games console
So they would keepnout of any trouble

Anyway we set up the iPad to record, the dog as we wanted to see what the dog was upto and if it followed the rules when we were outside

Anyway we realised when we scanned through it at one point dd started to have a go at him
Saying how she hates it when he tries to get her into trouble and she went on a rant at him and shouted sssssshhh

Then few mins later while playing minecraft

Calling him names, Keeno try hard
Sweat bag and something else
About eight times

What would you make of this ?

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iwantavuvezela · 10/03/2019 21:11

I think as the parent of your two children you might understand the dynamics between the two of them best. Or am I missing something from your post?

FiveLittlePigs · 10/03/2019 21:12

Personally, I would play it back with her watching it and ask her to explain what the hell she thought she was doing!

SnuggyBuggy · 10/03/2019 21:15

It's hard to say. Tone of voice says a lot. The difference between 11 and 5 is a lot and it's not unusual for an older sibling to get annoyed at a younger one.

nos123 · 10/03/2019 21:15

She “hates it when he tries to get her into trouble”- sounds like she’s resentful and is the one who tends to get blamed for things hence giving him a telling off away from the parents. He was obviously bothering her. It doesn’t sound malicious, younger siblings can be very annoying and I’m sure it’s just normal sibling stuff.

I find your reaction a bit extreme posting on MN.

Bunnybigears · 10/03/2019 21:17

Normal older/younger sibling relationship and nothing to get concerned over. Also concerning that Ipad was set up to record dog but aimed at the games consoleHmm

nos123 · 10/03/2019 21:20

Hang on...you think a sibling shouting “shhh” at another sibling is out of the ordinary?

nos123 · 10/03/2019 21:22

It sounds like the recording had nothing to do with the dog

cushioncuddle · 10/03/2019 21:22

I don't know if I believe you were recording the dog to see if it follows the rules. That's odd.
It's odd it recorded the kids as it would have been pointed at them and not the dog.

Your d said she doesn't like it when he gets her into trouble.

There was was then normal name calling. Nothing terrible.

Are you only interested in the elder child's naughty behaviour. Are you not concerned about the younger one getting her deliberately in trouble.

I'm confused by this post.

DianaT1969 · 10/03/2019 21:22

All strange. Wouldn't the dog be with you in the garden if you're out there anyway.
Why do you need to film your dog when your children could have told you what your dog was up to. With the ipad pointing to the games console, what were you hoping to catch?
Don't you know the dynamics between your two children? Is their bickering new to you?

JRMisOdious · 10/03/2019 21:23
Hmm
NataliaOsipova · 10/03/2019 21:23

It’s a big age gap and they’re unlikely to have much in common.....perhaps not surprising that your DD sometimes finds her little brother annoying? Nothing you’ve said seems out of the ordinary to me.

Lardlizard · 10/03/2019 21:23

Just before we went into the garden
He tried to get her into trouble for sometime

And I squashed it right away and said you keep out of it
He was saying she had been banned from the games console when she hadn’t been
She had, had her phone removed for being rude

So when he started trying to say she’s banned from this
We told him clearly that it was noting to do with him
And that she’s not banned from the console
So he was told v clearly not to shit stir !
Not in those exact words of course

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Lardlizard · 10/03/2019 21:25

You can’t really see the kids the tv etc or the console
The dog was in the living room

Jeepjgnitnof the garden at the moment as it’s tearing the up in this weather and dog had already been Ina. Huge walk so had more than enough excercise

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Lardlizard · 10/03/2019 21:25

Keeping it off the garden atm

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Livedandlearned · 10/03/2019 21:25

God knows what I'd catch my dc saying to each other! It's pretty standard but if you don't like it then you should try to talk to your dd about why she said it.

SnuggyBuggy · 10/03/2019 21:25

Well you can hardly expect her to appreciate someone trying to get her into trouble. It's not something anyone really likes

Lardlizard · 10/03/2019 21:26

You can hear the voices though

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Lardlizard · 10/03/2019 21:27

I’ve never heard her call him names before
Not in earshot anyay

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Surfskatefamily · 10/03/2019 21:32

Im one of 6 and whoa you shouldve heard what we called each other. Honestly its not unusual.
Younger siblings do often get the softer treatment and older ones will be very annoyed at this. I was far meaner to my little siblings (and at other times very loving)

SnuggyBuggy · 10/03/2019 21:32

All siblings argue and name call

Contraceptionismyfriend · 10/03/2019 21:36

Sound alike he behaved like a little shit and she was annoyed at him.

Perfectly normal.
To be honest she sounds pretty restrained.

FurrySlipperBoots · 10/03/2019 21:39

Next time keep the technology turned off and have the children and dog join you outside. Fresh air, active play, the sensory stimulation of being outdoors, using their imaginations, you to keep an eye on things...

Itwouldtakemuchmorethanthis · 10/03/2019 21:46

Do you think sh bullies him?

Witchend · 10/03/2019 22:03

Saying how she hates it when he tries to get her into trouble and she went on a rant at him and shouted sssssshhh

Sounds perfectly normal siblings.

If he is trying to get her into trouble, this needs nipping in the bud, because it will sour any relationship between them. 6yo is a very self-righteous age and they can be very much "A did this but I didn't because I'm good..." which if it's older siblings you need to watch because it's easy to fall into the trap of saying "yes, darling, you're good" thinking you're doing positive reinforcement beautifully.
What it's actually doing is pushing them into the roles of the innocent younger one and the naughty older one.

Lardlizard · 10/03/2019 22:08

Furry we had been out all day! Sports then lunch then party then dog walk
They are hardly playing on the console all day!

Just for 30 mins while we fixed something in the garden !

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