40's? From 40 to 49, what's changed?

[thinkingisharderthandoing]

So from approaching the 40's to approaching the 50's. How's that decade been?
I'm 45 this year......still feeling like I have a youngish streak, but realising I'm not so youngish as I may want to be.
It's a weird age.
How have you felt and dealt with it?

I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO DRESS ANY MORE

40-45 wasn't any different to my late 30s. But from 45 onwards everything is starting to change!!

This!
I remember being out with friends at 40 and moaning about ageing etc and one who had turned 50 said, you aint seen nothing till you hit 50, everything slides!!! I remember thinking she was being a bit of a moaner but now I'm 48 I get it. lines used to worry me but now it's the sag that's starting to creep in and that is far more ageing. The positive is I don't have many lines more than my early 40s but my friends who sun worshipped are starting to show it. I've been 50spf since my late 30s thank goodness and retinol is the best find ever!

Oh and hair, still thick on my head, sprinkling of grey around the front disguised by regular highlights but I hardly ever need to shave my legs and armpits anymore! Not sure if it's my failing eyesight though. I get a sprouting chin every month instead.
Also notice the lady garden isn't as luxurious and have spotted the odd grey down there but it's been swiftly plucked and no ore said about it.........apart from you lot lol!!!!

I have started wearing the MN approved, M&S Jeggings....all the time! They serve a dual purpose of holding my tummy in a bit and also they are extremely comfortable as the waist is elasticated! (and they're cheap!). I now just live in those with longish tops.

@ShitArmBadTattoo my problem exactly! I dress like a teenager and at almost 47 I worry I look like a fool
Problem is I hate how I look in more 'grown up' clothes and because I've remained very slim I'm under the (probably misguided!) impression it's ok to dress how I do. I feel totally lost most days!!

newyear it's totally ok to dress young, that is one thing I won't give up. I don't mean crop tops and skin tight dresses .My DM was stylish up until the day she died aged 74 and I'm carrying on for us both. I love cool looking older women.

I need these jeggings, what are these jeggings?

Yep, don't need to do my ablutions half as much!

Not got the leggings but Asda George stretchy skinny jeans are brill. Really cheap and so good. Sitting here in a black pair right now. So comfy but suck you right in.

direct.asda.com/george/womens/jeans/womens-skinny-jeans/D1M1G20C7S1,default,sc.html

£10 People!!!

I wear the same TopShop jeans I bought when I was 35. They now have trendy ripped knees

Problem is, when I sit down, it is so uncomfortable on the waist, I have to undo them... not ideal. (That's if I can do them up in the first place)

Agree the jowls are much more of a worry than the lines.

'The ordinary' is your friend!

www.marksandspencer.com/cotton-rich-jeggings/p/p22468863?image=SD_01_T57_8604_Y0_X_EC_90&color=BLACK&prevPage=plp

I read about them on the style and beauty board. My best discovery of 2018!

Thank you greenpop!

'The ordinary' is your friend! Yes , my bestie!

… and Asta!

Yep, saved my skin!

I just wish I'd started using retinol in my 30s. I'm on 2% emulsion at night daily and buffet serum in the day under a cheap Aldi Q10 day cream.My skin looks brighter and I've had no reaction, what's the next step?

I don't live in the UK so I have the retinol but I'm worried about the sun. Just put it on at night. I want to try the buffet.

For me, Vit C cream is amazing. Once you get past the stinging.
So, if I can be bothered I do one night retinol, next night Vit C 23%.

I also heard great things about the Aldi cream.

It's so humid here I don't need to use a moisturiser on top. Or I use a bog standard l'oreal.

It's 'The ordinary' creams that make the difference isn't it? To think I used to use Estee Lauder night repair for so long at 70 quid a pop!

'it's interesting that people have said that they're much more people intolerant"
I'm the opposite - after some shitty times myself & seeing others going through them too I'm a lot more tolerant & likely to assume that someone is having a rough patch or an off day. In the throes of divorce I also discovered the non-violent communication books which are American and hippy as hell but really resonated with me all the same.

I have to say I"m also very lucky in that rather than becoming invisible, I've gone the other way. I'm very small and was young looking (not in a good way) for years which was unhelpful work-wise, but now I've hit a personal and professional point where I get listened to, invited to speak at conferences etc. In fact I've suddenly discovered I've become the women I used to look up to when I was 30.

Now I'm working on really getting it all nailed over the next 20 years (health & life permitting) and becoming the elder who sits on panels & everyone pauses and looks at before they take a question

Just turned 46.
Not sure if I'm peri, I think so. Don't want to take HRT but I'm overwhelmed by the alternatives, I wish they'd just stick everything into one epic vitamin type thing.

My eyesight has been poor since my 20s so no change there.

Need to lose 9lbs and start some exercise but don't want to be the oldest person at the exercise class. Must get off my arse and move and start soon.

The aches and pains? Bloody hell. That's the worst bit.

The good news is that the DCs have flown so I have more money, my style is better, I'm enjoying some great holidays. No longer feel the need to strive for every promotion at work.

No grey hair, random facial hair or any of that stuff so far.

I'm definitely wiser and more content.

I'd like more friends but where to meet other women my age to go out for a meal and chuckle but still be in bed by 10?

Which TheOrdinary for jowls WendyCope?

Not sure any creams help jowls. I try to smile more as I have a resting bitch face and smiling gives you a natural lift. Retinol stimulates collagen so might help. I have noticed it has reduced my pigmentation. Will look into Vit C cream.

I swing between being tolerant and getting the rage. I guess that's normal?My DD18 heard me on the phone the other day to a garage and when i came off she asked when I became so confident talking to strangers on the phone!! Her generation is all about the text or direct message and they rarely speak on the phone, our landline rarely rings so they don't take messages.Bit off the thread but I realised I take no shit aanymore!

ThatPeachy There isn't. But vit C has been a lifechanger for me.

I do find, when motivated, that a week of lots of water and no alcohol and mainly veg does help a lot. But I honestly can't be bothered any more. I really can't.

I'm meant to go to the hairdresser tomorrow and am practically having a panic attack about it.

I do not want to look at myself for 2 hours, but I do know I will look better and more youthful at the end of the ordeal.

This thread has cheered me up, thanks OP

Wendy I HATE the hairdressers! Why do we have to sit looking at ourselves under a bright light. I wear extra make-up when I go and I am embarrassed to admit that.

greenpop

I'm taking DD with me, for a trim and added confidence I've put it off for about 10 months

It's just too long now and needs fresh highlights due to all the new grey hair.

Where did my confidence go? Arggh!