I think I'm dying of the peri menopause

[MorningsEleven]

I've had kids, labour, c sections - one crash- an endometrioma the size of a jaffa orange on my ovary, an operation to remove the ovary and several paper cuts 😉

I went to bed this afternoon because the cramping and the flooding and the clots and the fucking anxiety and sleepless nights have ground me down. I've got a migraine aura and I'm just so bloody angry that my fertility can't gently fade away with a whimper.

I've always been the "get your bodyform and go roller skating in white jeans" type but I can't do this. DH gave me a hot water bottle, he's on my good list

If anyone has any advice, chocolate, chips, wine, bread, cheese, weight loss tips, similar peri distress please come share.

The Olympic eyebrow hair, that is like someone else’s pube has jumped ship and transplanted itself on my forehead.

That made me splutter

Lou - buy a magnifying mirror and you will never look back, especially if you get an illuminated one! You will find a whole host of other facial disfigurements you could never see before and realise how much your eyesight has gone to pot. Before you know it you’ll also need your glasses AND the magnifying mirror to see yourself (tricky doing the mascara bit).

Sometimes it’s better not to know

Yeah... I have a feeling I would never leave the house. I’d be too busy sobbing. I’m gonna leave that for a bit!

A friend of mine who is a personal trainer and nutritionalist and who works with peri and post menopausal women is launching a Facebook menopause advice group on Saturday. It's free to join and she'll be giving tips and sharing her experiences. You might find it helpful
www.facebook.com/groups/2287064184911534/

I was enjoying her when I just started bleeding randomly.After my last bleed(carrier bags on the car seat on the 5min trip to the doctors and wearing a Cardy incase coverage needed)I had a scan,fibroids,thickened endometrium and polyps.
I have an appointment to see the gynae team soon But I have had to come off the HRT.
The joint aches are back,insomnia,night sweats and nonstop flushes which make my hair stick to my face.I am a bit grumpy and seem to regularly loose words.
I am 58 and going to try for a hysterectomy so that I can have my oestrogen gel back and feel normal again.Putying the chances of cancer to the back my mind.
I have not been brave enough to get a magnifying mirror,nature knew what it was doing reducing you close vision at this time of our lives.
Why does activity like breathing start a hot flushes.?

So why did our Mothers sail through the menopause?

You're kidding, right? My DM absolutely did not 'sail through the menopause', she was a total fucking nightmare for 10 years!! She didn't talk about it, it's true, but she was utter hell to be around. Thank god she had me at 25 and by the time she was at her absolute worst I was gone - uni, job and even moved to another country! I am absolutely determined not to be like her - not least because I had my kids in my 30s so they will still be around and they will probably hate me as much as I hated her if I turn into the fucking bitch that she did. Sorry, that's a horrible thing to say about my DM, but it's true. She was a total fucking bitch!

Hotterthanahotthing I hope you don’t have to wait as long as I’ve had to. I’m sure they keep you waiting in the hope that it’s go away, which for some women it does. Why have you had to come off the HRT?

I don’t think I want a hysterectomy - not a full one anyway. I was told I had a thickened endo but dont know how thick. I’d prefer something to reduce the fibroids first. I really don’t know why our wombs won’t play ball at this age and do the opposite of what they’re supposed to...ie fibroids are supposed to shrink on menopause!

I feel your pain OP. The first thing that happened when I went peri was my migraines went nuclear. From having 3 or 4 a year, I was having them every few days, with aura, so I got to the point where I was frightened to drive a long distance in case one started. Permanent beta blockers helped, thank God.

I was then reasonably OK for a few years and then the hot flushes and anxiety started. I was having a minimum of two dozen a day and I went about three months without a proper night's sleep. The anxiety was hideous. My quality of life was shite and I went for the HRT out of desperation.

It's made a huge difference. I have the gel plus a very small dose of progesterone, and I'm on just about the smallest dose possible and it keeps me stable.

I’m 47. I got my mirena removed in August and I’ve been in a mental and physical decline since then, low mood, rosacea, no sex drive, hot flushes. My bloods are back today and in a phone conversation I’ve been told I’m post menopausal. I’m totally shocked as I always assumed I was peri. No appointment to discuss for a week but has anyone else experienced this?

Have your periods stopped Iam? If not, then surely you can't be post-menopausal and someone has read your results wrong?

@IamMummyhearmeROAR I believe that blood tests are not recommended as a diagnosis for menopause as hormones fluctuate so much and several different ones are needed, taken at different times of the cycle. I actually did a postal blood test just after I had the Mirena put in which told me I was post menopausal....I was having periods right up to when I had the coil in so knew I couldn’t be as it hadn’t been a year...so I read up more on it.

Perhaps if you felt better with the Mirena have another one put in? That plus the 50mg transdermal estrogen patch is one of the safest ways to get HRT into the body and deal with any symptoms.

Of course, any bleeding when post menopause should be investigated further.

Actually went to the doctors about this on Monday.

Compared to some I seem to be getting off lightly. Periods used to be like clockwork, now harder to predict, but I've only completely missed two, so doctors said no cause for concern.

Also suffering with Anxiety, constant tiredness, but rarely sleep past 5am, palpitations, water retention. Fortunately the hot flashes are confined to night time, I'm freezing the rest of the time. Periods are not too bad, much shorter but heavier, it seems like my entire insides come out in one go. Mid cycle is more painful than my periods.

Doctor said I'm too young for HRT, And come back when it's unmanageable or my periods stop.
And told me to take B6, evening primrose oil, red clover.

Why can't they just stop?

Freshprincess, I don’t know how old you are, but if your symptoms get too uncomfortable, I’d go back to your GP. As far as I can see, even with early meno, either the combined contraceptive pill or HRT is indicated www.nhs.uk/conditions/early-menopause/

I'm now taking black cohosh, oil of evening primrose, Agnus Castus, vitamin D and menopace.

As well as sertroline and thyroxine.

I'll let you know if anything works!

I’m 47, so not young really. GP said as I could only take HRT for 5 years so leave it as long as I could.

I think I might have played symptoms down a bit too much.

I almost fainted in Tescos today, think it's day 12 or 13 of bleeding I'm losing count.
Decided my diet of lentil crisps and coconut yoghurt better improve so had pasta with vegan pesto, watercress and mixed seeds, a fig roll and half a pint of guinness It's almost knocked me out!
I'm off to bed, luckily DD is sensible enough to put herself to bed later.
Hope you all have a good, restful night tonight- sleep well

Blimey Slipways...perhaps take an iron supplement. Actually while you’re at it how about A-Z vitamins and minerals, or vitamins for menopausal women (aka expensive wee!).

Freshprincess, that’s the problem, we can tend to downplay how crap we feel to our GPs. Despite that, I think the 5yr HRT thing is outdated. It does depend on other factors (family history of cancer etc) but there is more of a thinking nowadays that HRT can be taken much longer. Hop over to the menopause matters website for further info and advice.

Slipways, have you been tested for anaemia?

So you will get through this, but by God I remember how bad it was. The Mirena coil & sage tablets saved my sanity. Good luck.

Thanks for asking Peridot and for the suggestion of iron tablets over50
I'm taking multivitamins with iron also calcium and vit B complex daily.
If someone's diagnosed as anaemic are they then given iron tablets? which I'm already taking. So perhaps naively I was thinking it wasn't worth wasting the doctor's or my time?

Some kinds of anaemia need a specific type of iron- the iron is there but you can't take it up, or something. Definitely worth getting checked.

Also, dairy and coffee/tea prevent iron absorption, vit c helps it. So wash the tablets down with orange juice, not coffee!

One of my DDs was diagnosed anaemia years ago and told to get Ferrous fumarate (you can get OTC but they do ask if your GP has recommended it). Warning gives you black poo and can make you constipated if in too high a dose.

Other DD recently had blood tests, was told she was low in iron and told to take vitamin B vitamins, the alternative being vitamin B shots which work faster - here’s why: www.nhs.uk/conditions/vitamin-b12-or-folate-deficiency-anaemia/
So I guess it depends on what kind of anaemia.
Personally I tend to prefer a good diet if possible and Vitamin D with calcium tablets in the winter. Deficiencies tend to sometimes need high dose supplements. If you are feeling faint, I would go and see your GP.

You guys are scaring me. I'm 33.

Thanks for your replies. I had no periods with Mirena and had a bleed not long after removal in August. Nothing since then. I currently use the POP but my GP says it’s a mood surpressor so she would rather another Mirena. I just dread the insertion process after a bad experience. I’m looking forward to my fave to face with the GP to answer some of my questions and move forward positively

You guys are scaring me

You're right to be scared, we're psychotic with the hormones 🤣

Interesting that I'm offering a potential solution in DIM supplementation and watching Eric Berg youtube tutorials for lifestyle chanfges that can massively help perimenopause and no one has commented or expressed interest.
Cake, gin etc will make all of your symptoms worse - it's time to take our health into our own hands without drugs.