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Original poster

I think I'm dying of the peri menopause

214 replies

MorningsEleven · 29/01/2019 18:33

I've had kids, labour, c sections - one crash- an endometrioma the size of a jaffa orange on my ovary, an operation to remove the ovary and several paper cuts 😉

I went to bed this afternoon because the cramping and the flooding and the clots and the fucking anxiety and sleepless nights have ground me down. I've got a migraine aura and I'm just so bloody angry that my fertility can't gently fade away with a whimper.

I've always been the "get your bodyform and go roller skating in white jeans" type but I can't do this. DH gave me a hot water bottle, he's on my good list

If anyone has any advice, chocolate, chips, wine, bread, cheese, weight loss tips, similar peri distress please come share.

OP posts:
Eloisedublin123 · 30/01/2019 07:05

Thanks aqua ❤️

PeridotCricket · 30/01/2019 07:14

Highly recommend hrt for those who can. And wool duvets for anyone having night sweats!

mizu · 30/01/2019 07:16

I had a full hysterectomy at 42 3 years ago and now take HRT despite not being able to take oral contraception due to migraines - and many other symptoms.
Has changed my life and in the main I feel fab.

Not suggesting an op Grin but perhaps a rethink on HRT.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Menopause Women's health
oreosoreosoreos · 30/01/2019 07:34

I'm peri menopausal and have endo. I'd highly recommend lavender oil (a few drops in a carrier oil rubbed on the abdomen) for period cramps - I know it's a bit woo, I have no idea how or why it works, all I know is it works for me so I don't care!

Also, CBD oil, greatly helps my anxiety/sever pmt - the latter of which seems to have got worse with peri.

picklemepopcorn · 30/01/2019 07:34

I get very hot at night, but don't sweat. I don't want hrt as I don't want periods back. GP says after a year without periods, there is an HRT which won't bring them back. That is what I'm hanging out for!

picklemepopcorn · 30/01/2019 07:35

It's the exhaustion I'm fed up with, though. I could do nothing all day, just sit around dozing.

AuntieStella · 30/01/2019 07:37

I didn't realise how bad the anxiety was until it started to lift.

The abbatoir periods were - um - memorable

WrenNatsworthy · 30/01/2019 07:46

I'm on low dose anti- depressants which made all the difference. Been on them for 2 years now.
I can't really drink alcohol without getting a temperature spike but the night sweats and debilitating anxiety are gone.

I'm thinking about doing a 'swap' with anti - depressants and hrt but I'm going to wait until the Spring.

Sympathies from me, Op, hope you find something that works for you.

Original poster
MorningsEleven · 30/01/2019 08:47

Good to know mizu. I'm considering having my entire abdomen amputated.

oreosoreosoreos not at all woo. I've put some on, I use lavender for headaches anyway so there's always a bottle by my bed.

PeridotCricket baavet all the way here.

picklemepopcorn I can't sleep at night but I could sleep the whole day. When DH works away I pack the kids off to school and go to bed with the dog. We snooze and fart gently at each other.

OP posts:
Squeakyheart · 30/01/2019 10:46

I thought I was peri with heavy periods and horrendous pmt that lasted longer and made me into someone I did not like at all. Then I fell pregnant! (Long-standing infertility issues so didn't bother with contraception) now I'm just waiting for it to start again when I stop breastfeeding with a baby in tow !

juneau · 30/01/2019 10:53

My concern with HRT is that oral contraception gives me migraines and, on balance, I'd rather this.

You don't have to take HRT orally OP - you can have patches or gel to rub on your skin. Have you discussed these other options with your GP and what does s/he say re: migraines? Don't assume it will the same as taking a pill orally without checking first.

As for this: wants me to go onto anti-depressants which is a road I refuse to go down Why Catniss? If a medication can help you, and a low dose antidepressant has been shown to massively help a lot of women with miserable peri symptoms, why wouldn't you give it a go? I have a good friend who was suffering horribly with all the usual symptoms and she was put on oestrogen gel + mirena + a low dose antidepressant and she says it's changed her life from one of misery and anxiety and horrible mood swings to something she's once more enjoying - she feels like herself again. Please don't cut off your nose to spite your face, unless you have a medical reason why can cannot take antidepressants. They really can and do help a lot of women.

picklemepopcorn · 30/01/2019 12:13

I'm also on vagifem which is making a huge difference. I didn't even realise I needed it until a thread on here mentioned it. I'd had vague 'am I getting cystitis?' feelings, which never came to anything, and a slight awareness of the area- not strong enough to ask GP about, or bother over really. But I feel much more comfortable now!

Asta19 · 30/01/2019 12:16

I posted about this on the menopause board yesterday. I'm nearly 50 with lots of peri symptoms but the worst is whenever I get my periods (which are still annoyingly regular). It makes me feel like death. I napped for two hours yesterday lunchtime. Then I was back in bed by 7pm and slept right through till 7am. Didn't have dinner or anything. Every flippin month this happens. I've been holding out on HRT but not sure I will for much longer!

Lavenderdays · 30/01/2019 12:52

Yes, I am sure I am experiencing many of the symptoms of peri-menopause but no night sweats yet. My mood is not great and my hormones have always led me a bit of song and dance. I have young children in the mix too, not a great combination when all I sometimes want to do is crawl into a dark space on my own!

Lavenderdays · 30/01/2019 12:54

Squeakyheart, I could have written your post, except I have just stopped breastfeeding and my periods have returned these past few months.

granadagirl · 30/01/2019 13:02

Thought the lead upto peri menopause was bad, I’ve been period free 7 years now.
Post is just as bad if not worse, anxiety of the scale often rising it’s head when you think you’ve got past it. Irritability at a snap, from nowhere. Aches and pains, you never thought could ache there.
Tiredness, headaches, no libido, VA. Just to name my issues only

No HRT, no thank you. Works for some, but you still get symptoms

Original poster
MorningsEleven · 30/01/2019 13:04

@Squeakyheart

Noooooooooooo! If DH's vasectomy fails, there'll be trouble 🤣

OP posts:
bananaramaspyjamas · 30/01/2019 13:20

It's crap isnt it. Anxiety, depression and I keep getting a boiling hot face. Plus laying in bed wondering why I can't get to sleep. And oh the non stop periods. I've either got PMT or a super heavy period, with literally about 2 days in between where I feel not to bad.

Squeakyheart · 30/01/2019 13:38

*Lavenderdays

Morningseleven
*
It's my husband I feel sorry for peri and sleep deprivation are not going to make me s happy bunny! I have wondered if I can breast feed till it's all over and done with!

pickletickled · 30/01/2019 13:39

Sympathy to all Flowers
I have been sure I switched into peri meno mode but according to the GP secretary when I rang for blood results this morning, I'm not! Hormone tests came back fine with NFA she said......
So what the frig is going on with me then....
I'm 40, I've never had a regular cycle as such but somewhere between 23 and 27 days was normal to me. Last month jumped to 33 days then this month was just 20 days.
Along with horrific mood swings, increased anxiety and not being able to control my temperature, It's more painful and heavy but the length of them has started dicking around now as well. I'll flood for 3 days then there will be a break of a day or 2 and it'll return again - I have no idea what that is all about.
I am not on any hormone meds nor can I take any.
I am awaiting pelvic scans for a separate issue (may be related, but who knows? because I sure as shit don't)
I have a knackered thyroid which has never given me period issues before. It's currently behaving itself though so wouldn't have thought that was to blame anyway.
Also recent tests i had done flagged up extremely low levels of Vit D and B12 in my body which I've just began treatment for. I know B6 plays a big part in our hormones but don't know what part, if any, B12 plays. Time will tell I suppose.
Urgh!

brownmare · 30/01/2019 13:42

I had a horrendous perimenopause and ended up having a hysterectomy. My one regret is that I didn't seek help sooner, I had about a decade of misery where I couldn't go anywhere!

The good news is that I am now much happier period free, had my ovaries removed and no hrt and I feel the best that I have in years once the flushes and sweats settled down. It will end Flowers

Lavenderdays · 30/01/2019 13:48

Squeaky, I've handed the night feeds over to dh (to ease baby off the breast). DH is in a bit of a mess after just a few days with lack of sleep! It's not that dh never woke up to help sometimes but he is getting the full brunt of it now...whilst I feel so much better getting more sleep, sleep deprivation was almost driving me mad. DD is still waking up in the night for comfort and she has a formula feed, and I am inevitably woken up but I feel less drained somehow. Now that I am winding down the breastfeeding, my hormones feel scrambled but I am almost certain that I have peri-menopause (previously confirmed by a fertility consultant that I was destined for early menopause and highly unlikely to have anymore dcs = dc3).

justilou1 · 30/01/2019 14:01

Try summer in thecAustealian tropics when you’re dealing with bastard perimenopause. I’ ve got the rapid-cycling auras and the insomnia, the sweats (who doesn’t, here?) the belly, the suddenly dry skin and thin, greasy hair (wtaf?). I had a hysterectomy years ago, so no periods, but I “feel different.” Ladies, you need cooling pillows! They’re kind of magic. I bought two! You can get them on amazon, etc!!!!!!

picklemepopcorn · 30/01/2019 14:36

What do you mean by 'rapid cycling auras', Lou?

aethelgifu · 30/01/2019 14:53

What do you do if you have a GP who will only prescribe anti-d's (and one that is KNOWN to cause weight gain) and not try HRT?