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Original poster

I'm going to get sacked tomorrow

110 replies

mimbulusmimbultonia · 13/01/2019 21:24

That's just it really. Shitting myself

Had a miscarriage in November so had 2 weeks off for that work were not happy at all at that but couldn't help it.

Was in and out of hospital over Christmas because it turned out to be a molar pregnancy so I had to go to Sheffield for tests and chemo . All over now but definitely had more time off over Christmas than I should have but couldn't help that.

Then on thursday 3rd January my mum killed herself and I've been off work since then sorting out her affairs and the funeral. I'm 27 and now have no one apart from my DH, I'm going to get sacked tomorrow because I've taken so much time off work and I couldn't give a shit.

I really don't want to face up to it but I can't not go in again, even though I could do with another few days to sort some more stuff out.

Things will get better soon right? I can get another job if I tell the reason why I got sacked?

OP posts:
SeptemberIssue · 14/01/2019 00:09

Oh god how awful for you, what an horrific time you’ve had and this will not be adding to it.

Your employer sounds incredibly negligent here — they cannot penalise you, let alone dismiss you, because of pregnancy related illness and if they did, you have the right to claim automatic unfair dismissal. E.g. you do not need to be outiwth the 2 year “qualifying period” to claim.

Have they followed a fair and correct absence policy? You should’ve been subject to prior disciplinary proceedings and gone through the stages of this before they can dismiss you.

Also, they should be offering you (not legally, but many employers do) compassionate leave for the death of an immediate family member.

If they have not given you 1. A formal letter/email explaining their case and reasons for inviting you, 2. Followed a correct and fair process, 3. Given you the right to representation at the meeting tomorrow — then you should email whoever is in charge of the meeting explaining you will not be attending and the reasons why. If they have not followed the process to the letter then they are acting unlawfully. You should contact ACAS.

I don’t think the NHS would be as negligent as to dismiss you, you find that with these government departments they’re very scared of negitive press/tribunals.

Hope you get through it, you don’t need the stress of your work breathing down you neck too! Sending you hugs xxx

HauntedPencil · 14/01/2019 00:25

I'm so sorry OP.

I would go to your GP first thing then call work. Tell them what's happened. Get signed off officially and get that out of the way so you can concevtrate on yourself. M

Before you ring then I'd definitely echo the advice to ring ACAS who are really kind and helpful.

I don't think you will be sacked but it's incredibly stressful in itself when circumstances mean you need absences as that's an additional worry.

Original poster
mimbulusmimbultonia · 14/01/2019 00:33

@Howmanysleepstilchristmas I'm not on any stages Blush I just thought I'd sack me after taking so much time off and got confused they hadn't rung me because my previous trust used to ring every day you were off to see when you were coming back so I think I just assumed because they hadn't rung they didn't want me to come back. My head is all over the place frankly I'm not usually so useless but I can't think about anything for longer than a minute or two at the moment.

OP posts:
hamtoastiesandpickledeggs · 14/01/2019 00:50

Hello! I work in the nhs and I'm also a union rep :-) I can assure you that they won't sack you for time off (as you have genuine reasons) and if they did want to speak to you about your time off then there are a LOT of steps :-) also pregnancy related time off does not count towards sickness (this would include the time off you had for your molar pregnancy).

I'm sorry you've had such a shit time :-( I have been there myself with a couple of mcs and just wanted to let you know that there are a lot of us out there to talk to if you want to :-) Look after yourself and definitely get to the GP to get some time off sorted!

abbsisspartacus · 14/01/2019 00:53

Get signed off take some time to recover deal with it later

FenellasRedVelvetDress · 14/01/2019 01:14

Do as most other people have said and get GP to sign you off sick.
This gives you some breathing space.
You shouldn’t be thinking of going back until you feel mentally strong enough after the funeral.
If I were you I wouldn’t bother with ACAS. A Company get ‘ let you go’ without reason in the first two years. Disability discrimination and whistle blowing are the only things I know you can take them to IT for if under two years. But they could say it’s not because of the time off due to your pregnancy but due to the extra time off you had due to a bereavement ( a lot of companies give you three days for a bereavement, unless it is your child. So mum, dad, husband etc , three days is the standard in a lot of contracts) and the fact that you didn’t ring in every day. They should have been checking up on you as duty of care but there we go - that’s bosses for you.

I would use the time off to look for another job.
Keep on the sick as long as you can.
They might sack you by asking you to come in for a meeting or by letter. If they ask you to go in for a meeting and you STILL feel you are going to get the chop then resign. If they send a letter to you and it’s not recorded delivery they don’t know if you have received it or not. I would then play innocent and resign by post .

But whatever happens/you do it’s only a job.
You will be able to find another.
You are going through a terrible time so please please try not to spend too much time worrying about a job. We work to live, not live to work.
Make use of friends/family wh9 are offerning you support - you need it.

Just get through the next few weeks . I send you many hugs and a furry snuggle off my lovely doggy. Flowers

Spagyetti · 14/01/2019 01:20

Pls contact ACAS:. m.acas.org.uk/index.aspx?articleid=1410

Regardless of your length of service, your pregnancy shouldn't be taken into account.

SeptemberIssue · 14/01/2019 01:38

you may also claim automatic unfair dismissal if you have been dismissed as a result of pregnancy — www.peninsulagrouplimited.com/guides/automatically-unfair-dismissal/ it is not only applicable if you’ve whistle blown or are disabled. It’s applicable if you’ve been dismissed by any characteristic that is covered by the equalities act, pregnancy being one of them.

As many others have said, an organisation the size of the NHS will have all bases covered with these things are therefore are highly unlikely to dismiss you so you shouldn’t look for a new job just yet Smile, your employer will support you through this too and will be understanding. They may even offer you some sort of employee counselling service/occupational health.

Hope you get this sorted OP! As I said before, it really is the last thing you want over you at the moment! I can’t imagine how you’re feeling xx

Sweetieepea · 14/01/2019 01:43

NHS usually very good in cases of absence. Only things that would worry me is whether you have abided by the Trust’s Sickness Procedures? When my mother had her stroke, we were told that there was nothing that could be done and she was expected to die quickly. We were given a quiet room to be with her. As I didn’t want to leave her my husband phoned my work as I was due in on a night shift that night. However later that day she was transferred to a ward (as she hadn’t died as quickly as they thought she would). I phoned my Manager that afternoon (Thursday) and briefed her on the situation. I was asked to keep them updated and would get 3 days bereavement leave. Mum hung on and died in the early hours of the Sunday morning. I phoned my work and told them and also said I would phone my manager the next day, which I did. Manager asked if I had had any Carers Leave that year, which I hadn’t. I was given 3 days Carer’s leave on top of my Bereavement Leave. I think the key to it all is ensuring you keep your Manager properly informed. On my return to work one of the questions is did I adhere to the Trust’s Guidelines, which I had, so no problems. However you do not seem to have kept your work properly informed, which may be brought up. Don’t think they will dismiss you but you may get a Written Warning! I know it’s hard when things happen like this but you should probably been in touch with your Manager more frequently to avoid this.

InSightMars · 14/01/2019 01:54

You’ve gone through a lot in a such a short time, I’m so sorry. It bloody sucks that workplaces can’t see that sometimes random events converge all within a short timeframe where under normal circumstances you wouldn’t need so much time off. Honestly though, if they do sack you, it might just be the break you need. You’ve been under relentless emotional pressure you and it does sound like you need a period of extended leave to sort out your mums affairs and then to allow yourself some healing time. Like pps said, there will be another job down the road when you’re better placed to give it your full attention and attendance.

CatchingBabies · 14/01/2019 02:53

I also work in the NHS, they cannot sack you based on those absences. The pregnancy related ones are totally separate and therefore don’t count towards you sickness records. That means you have 1 absence, no one can be sacked after 1 absence. Go to the GP and get signed off for as long as you need, work will still be there when you’re ready to go back x

KeiTeNgeNge · 14/01/2019 03:49

Did you get signed off?

ApolloandDaphne · 14/01/2019 04:27

I agree you need to be signed off. I am sure this can all be sorted out and you won't be sacked. Take care fo yourself.

StealthPolarBear · 14/01/2019 10:38

Any update op? Hope you're OK x

Original poster
mimbulusmimbultonia · 14/01/2019 14:22

Been signed off for 'at least 2 weeks' with instructions to come back in 2 weeks to have another chat. My manager rang this morning and I missed her call so I spent 2 hours pissing around not listening to her voicemail because I was worried about what she might say but I sucked it up and rang her back and she was lovely and told me to take as long as I need to get right. So I've gone from
Shitting myself about being sacked to feeling pretty supported

OP posts:
OllyBJolly · 14/01/2019 14:25

That's good news, OP. Take care of yourself.

MzHz · 14/01/2019 14:27

Oh love, you have been through so much - I'm delighted that your manager is so supportive! Look after yourself (((hug)))

Rudgie47 · 14/01/2019 14:34

I knew you wouldn't be sacked. I'm pleased things are a bit brighter for you.x

Dream37 · 14/01/2019 14:46

Your story made me go cold, you've been through so much. Pleased to read that work have been supportive and you have some time off. Look after yourself hun x

spiderlight · 14/01/2019 15:00

I'm so very sorry for all you've been through, but it must be a huge relief to know that your manager is supportive. Take care of yourself Flowers

HoraceCope · 14/01/2019 15:05

So glad to hear

StealthPolarBear · 14/01/2019 15:08

Oh op I'm so pleased for you

Ethel80 · 14/01/2019 15:18

I'm so glad that your manager was supportive. You deserve nothing less but it's not always the case so that's good news.

Please don't rush back to work, you've had a horrendous couple of months and need to take some time to process this.

I'm so sorry about your baby and your mum. Be kind to yourself and ask for help if you need it. People will want to support you.

Awwlookatmybabyspider · 14/01/2019 15:32

I'm so sorry for your heart breaking losses.
You sound extremely strong and brave.
My thoughts are with you.
Take things slowly and easy. You've been through more in a few weeks/months than some people go through in a life time. xFlowers

Missingstreetlife · 14/01/2019 15:37

Good news, and so they should

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