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Original poster

Please critique my wedding timetable

110 replies

BuffaloCauliflower · 12/01/2019 20:28

You lot are always great for pointing out snags in plans others haven’t thought of. I’d be grateful for some critical eyes on my wedding day timetable.

We’ve changed this plan so many times trying to get what’s best for us, best for our guests, and doesn’t cost more than we can afford. Current thoughts are as follows. This is for all guests staying all day, no separate evening guests.

2.30pm - Church ceremony starts. Hopefully late enough most people will have been able to get lunch in before coming. Ceremony roughly an hour.

4-4.15pm - guests get to reception venue 5-10 minutes drive away, assuming ceremony takes until 3.30pm, allowing for some picture taking at the church, some general faffing and possibly waiting for some people doing car ferrying to go back and forth a couple of times.

4.15pm - crisps/dips/nuts/olives. Drinks. Some entertainment TBC.

5.30pm? 6pm? (I cant figure this out. Is 6pm too long from arrival?) wedding breakfast, which is substantial sharers, hot fork buffet, mini dessert options - the food is really important to us and won’t be scrimped on.

7.30/8ish - speeches. Will be 4-5 of us speaking so needs plenty of time.

8.30ish - cake cutting, first dance.

9/9.30pm - Cheese (cheese wedding cake) laid out with crackers, naice breads, chutneys, olives, nuts.

Finish - Wrap up whenever, private land so don’t have to be out by any time.

How does this sound? What am I missing? Would you be hungry? Thanks all.

OP posts:
Original poster
BuffaloCauliflower · 12/01/2019 20:31

Oh there’s a DJ in the evening. Didn’t mention as this is mainly time/food focused.

OP posts:
SBDB · 12/01/2019 20:32

Hi there

I had a similar timetable for my wedding day in 2015. In the invite I included a sheet of paper with info on like places to stay nearby etc and a very clear indication that dinner would not be served until 5.30 so eat first!

It worked fine as people had eaten already and as far as I’m aware no one was unhappy with it as they all knew

spaghettipeppers · 12/01/2019 20:33

Can you do two speeches before the main meal? Otherwise people will be zoning out (unless you are very strict on timings!).

I think 6pm is too long. 5.30pm sounds perfect.

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Weddings
Ragwort · 12/01/2019 20:34

Why are 4 or 5 of you speaking? Sorry to sound harsh but as a guest the speeches are incredibly tedious and boring. Please reconsider this part of the day.

NWQM · 12/01/2019 20:34

Just a couple of thoughts....

  • 6pm for the main is more like most people would be used to. Gives you a little bit longer for photo’s etc
  • cheese board etc sounds lovely to me but are you offering an alternative?
Dextrodependant · 12/01/2019 20:39

Do you have any guests with a nut allergy?

fruitbrewhaha · 12/01/2019 20:39

Do the speeches before the food, when everyone has sat down. Its not the traditional way but, if anyone making a speech is nervous it's good to get them out of the way, and they can enjoy their food.

shpoot · 12/01/2019 20:42

I'd definitely say do food earlier. Nibbles almost from when your guests get to the venue. They won't want to hang around the church having already been there 1.5 hours. I'd try and nudge the food to 5 and the speeches either split to before and after or even one between courses. 4 speeches is a lot. People are ready to dance and mingle by 7.30. Good on you for asking. So many don't!

DuchessofManchester · 12/01/2019 20:43

Sit down for 5.30 for speeches then serve the wedding breakfast at 6.
More than half an hour and its going to really drag for your guests.
Have a wonderful day

Amazonian27 · 12/01/2019 20:44

If poss I would move the start to 3pm then people have plenty of time to eat, get ready changed and travel to venue etc. For a wedding at 2pm people may be expected to eat incredibly early.
So many people speaking sounds too much unless you limit each one to well under 4 minutes or something.
Can you check timings with any professionals involved I.e. photographers etc as you may be underestimating?
I would indicate an approx start time for wedding breakfast so people no eating time in advance they don’t need to know the whole timetable.

IggyAce · 12/01/2019 20:47

I would say 6pm for food, as it will give your photographer longer to get all the shots you may want, as well as giving you a chance to mingle with your guests. My dh is a wedding photographer and he requests 30mins minimum for the bride and groom photographs, then group shots can take time because someone key has wandered off.

Mayra1367 · 12/01/2019 20:51

4/5 speeches is way too much

LoniceraJaponica · 12/01/2019 20:55

"Why are 4 or 5 of you speaking? Sorry to sound harsh but as a guest the speeches are incredibly tedious and boring. Please reconsider this part of the day."

I agree. I also think a 3pm wedding would be better. That's what we had.
My ony other concern is the assumption that all the guests will be driving. How will public transport users get from the church to the reception?

Original poster
BuffaloCauliflower · 12/01/2019 21:34

Thanks all

On speeches - because I’m going to speak, groom and best man want to speak, and the family friend giving me away wants to speak (my dad has passed) maid of honour might say a few words. Personally I love the speeches at weddings and I’ve been to weddings recently where this sort of range of people spoke, and it was lovely to hear from everyone not just the men. Could definitely split them up though, or do before dinner. They won’t be more than 5-7 ish mins each, no need to go for ages.

There will be nibbles straight away as soon as we get to reception, that’s on the timetable above.
Timings will definitely be on the invite, as will all other details.

No I’m not anticipating an alternative to the cheese and accompaniments. Not sure what else I could do without paying the caterer to do a whole extra evening thing (we’re in a field, everything has to be brought in) and as people will have just eaten a massive dinner at 6-7.30pm I didn’t think loads more food was needed. It will have breads and humus etc out too.

No known nut allergies but would obviously check for any allergies.

OP posts:
Original poster
BuffaloCauliflower · 12/01/2019 21:35

@LoniceraJaponica I don’t assume all will be driving, some will have come on the train, that’s why I said about those ferrying other going back and forth, like ushers taking people without cars to the venue then coming back for others

OP posts:
LoniceraJaponica · 12/01/2019 21:38

Sorry, I missed that bit. I hope it goes with a swing. It sounds lovely.

Original poster
BuffaloCauliflower · 12/01/2019 21:39

Thanks Smile just trying to plan all the details! I’m always the host but never on this scale

OP posts:
Original poster
BuffaloCauliflower · 12/01/2019 21:40

But liking the idea of speeches before the food, makes a lot of sense with these timings and everyone can get on with drinking and dancing as soon as food is finished

OP posts:
BackforGood · 12/01/2019 21:56

I know having the speeches before the meal has become quite popular in recent times, but I think it is better to have them afterwards, as everyone has had a couple more drinks and they are no longer hungry, so everyone is more receptive to the weak jokes and the corny (and sweet) things people say.

IME, I can't see the Church service lasting an hour. I've been to a LOT of Church weddings over a number of decades - both as a guest and also as a volunteer at my Church. It is very unusual for a service to last that long. Unless there is something you know that you haven't put in your OP, I'd guestimate the service will only last 40mins.

So I'd have the ceremony at 3pm.

Photos 3.45 to 4.30ish
Everyone moving to the Reception
Short time for a drink, but cut down the 'hanging around time' at that point.
Eat 5.30 or 5.45.
Then speeches as and when everyone is ready.

itsalloverforanotheryear · 12/01/2019 22:01

I wouldn't have dips...only because I'm greedy, would dip a breadstick in the dip, it would drop onto my outfit and I'd look like the sloppy trollop I am for the rest of the day 😉

Original poster
BuffaloCauliflower · 12/01/2019 22:21

@BackforGood thank you. I’m a Christian but I haven’t actually been to a wedding in a church in a while and have a pretty terrible memory! I’ll work with 45mins in that case. Only planning to have a few pictures at the church, most will probably be at the reception, but I will chat to the photographer.
Good point on people having drunk more! There will be booze as soon as we get to the reception though, not hanging around for that.
So maybe 5.30pm for food then speeches after?

I originally did think 3pm ceremony to give a bit more time to everyone, but for some reason 2.30pm just sounds better in my head? I think I’d rather go 2.30pm and bring dinner forward to 5.30pm, rather than 3 and then 6.... but take the point of people travelling before

OP posts:
whiteroseredrose · 12/01/2019 22:26

I'd just spell it out that people need to have lunch first.

Londonbum · 12/01/2019 22:27

I don’t know why everyone is being so negative about speeches. They are just about my favourite bit of any wedding, and i love to hear from a range of people.

HildaZelda · 12/01/2019 22:32

I don't see what's odd about 4 or 5 speeches? That's what we had when we got married.
Actually we had 6. Bride, groom, both fathers, best man and priest.
They were all quite short though. 5 minutes or less.

Who do people normally have to speak at a wedding if you think 4 or 5 is odd?

Beerandpancakes · 12/01/2019 22:33

I think your timings sound fine, but do put the approx meal time in invites so people know to eat before.

As a guest personally I much prefer speeches after dinner as you're not hungry, usually have a drink/coffee and can relax. You'll never please anyone, so stick to what you personally prefer - it's your wedding!