DD Aged 5 wants her ears pierced!

[PFB1]

DD is asking me to have her ears pierced. I initially said she can once she's older but she's really keen to have it done.

Is 5 way too young? My mum was extremely strict so I don't feel like I have any guide as to what is reasonable and what's not.

Would appreciate some advice.

Thanks.

Looks common ☹️

I would be fine with it as long as she understands what is involved. And I am totally against it with babies, only if the child wants/consents. I wanted mine done when I was 5 and didn't stop badgering my mum about it until she gave in when I was 12. I firmly believe that the reason I then got tons of piercings done at a time when it was still unusual is because it was forbidden.

One thing to be aware if if school make them be taken out is that not everyone heals in 4-6 weeks so they might close up.

I don't think that 5 is too young my dd was 7/8 but if she had been younger I would have said yes. Tbh as much as I don't like earrings on babies I wish I had done it the so she didn't have to go through it. I think that the social norms around this are pretty arbitrary just get a small plain stud she'll be delighted but they won't be too ott.

10 here so Dd will have to wait till same age. Mine closed up when I took my earrings out as DD kept grabbing them as a baby. I recently had them repeirced and DD 4.5yrs hasn't fussed over getting hers done.

I’m so surprised that most people wouldn’t allow it. I begged for pierced ears at 5 and was allowed them. Mum tried clip on and stick on ones first to put me off asking but I was persistent! It was only a difficulty during weekly swimming lessons.

If I had a 5 year old DD who wanted her ears pierced, I would have said yes until I read this thread. Maybe it is a nice end of Yr 6 treat.

The are lots of things 5 year olds want, but that's no reason to let a child have them. It's a painful intrusive procedure and the rough and tumble of playing at that age makes injury much more likely. Also, people will form a view of a child and its family if the child is very young and is wearing earrings. That's not to say it's right to judge, but it will happen.

I don’t really get the ‘get it out of the way younger so they don’t have to go through the pain when they’re older’ argument. Having ears pierced at any age isn’t compulsory! I know plenty of people who haven’t got them pierced.
I had mine done at 13 after begging. Wore earrings for about 2 years then decided I didn’t like how it looked. Haven’t worn them since.

DD got hers done in the summer holidays, she was 6yo at the time. She'd been asking to have them done for around a year and knew what was involved.

I took her to a piercing studio to get them done and they used cartridges rather than a gun, they also did both ears at the same time. The cartridges were preloaded and steri-sealed with a gap in the middle for her earlobe. The piercer lined them up, said count to three, and then pressed them closed. No bang, no jump, and the earrings were in. She didn't even realise! She said it hadn't hurt at all and we had no complaining from her while they hurt, usually she's a bit of a drama llama and will milk the tiniest scratch for every bit of sympathy

I'd recommend a studio rather than somewhere like Claire's and try go off a recommendation from people you know who have had them done. The studio we used was recommended and they were great. Spoke to DD about what would be happening, showed her around, showed her the equipment, helped her choose her earrings (all surgical grade metals, nothing plated), gave her several opportunities to back out if she wanted to (with no charge). The aftercare was great too with free cleaning solution, instructions and a demonstration on how to use it, and an open door policy on coming back if there were any problems (including a full refund if the piercings had to be removed due to infection).

Piercer was cheaper too. £20 including earrings and aftercare instead £50+ at Claire's.

She's 5. Say no. Practice saying no and meaning it. Tell her she's too young and NO.

I suppose I may have an issue in the sense that I don't like telling her no unless it's something that is very serious. She is very well behaved on the whole and I suppose my method has been to teach her to make good choices rather than saying NO all the time. I don't know if I'm setting myself up to fail with that method.

It has worked on this occasion though. I explained about the position of the piercing can change as your ears grow so the hole can end up in the wrong position and she has decided she'd like to wait until she's older.

You don’t like telling her ‘no’?

My mum was very strict. She was abusive to me growing up. Her answer to everything was no. So yes, I do find it difficult to say but I obviously do say it when really required to. Other than that, I just give her information to help her make good decisions. Like I say, it's probably a flaw of mine. No one's the perfect parent though are they. We can only do our best.

Other than that, I just give her information to help her make good decisions. Like I say, it's probably a flaw of mine

I don’t think it’s a flaw at all. My parents did the same with us and I do the same with DD. Works for us. Obviously works for you!

Just saying 'no' without explanation is bad parenting. Much better to support them to make (age appropriate) decisions and when you do say no, explaining why. Helps them in the long run.

OP you can say no if you feel she’s too young. i pierced my DC ears when she was a baby and she’s fine, healed very quickly all the females in my family had the ears pierced as a baby were all fine.

no one i know that had there ears pierced done as a baby regretted it as an adult, i know there were plenty of people in my secondary school that got it done on their early teens and wished their parents had pierced their ears as a baby as it was a faff to keep clean etc when using certain hair products. (afro hair)

My granddaughter wanted hers done at 5 eventually her mum caved at 8.5
She’s been very sensible with them and doesn’t go to school and not a problem

Oh and I let my daughter have hers done at 12

My DD5 asked for her ears pierced. I (rightly or wrongly) showed her some You Tube videos of girls her age having it done then asked her to have a think about it and let me know.
She's asked Santa for clip on earrings for Christmas...

My five year old wants it done for her sixth birthday and I’m in two minds.

I don’t like the look of earrings on young children but most of her class have them done and she is the odd one out (her and one other girl). Not to mention the pressure from DH’s family because they are from a culture that pierce baby girls ears and find it weird that I have not had it done (and keep giving DD earrings as presents - grr). DH thinks I’m making way to much of a big deal about it because they can be taken out if you change your mind.

I’ve discussed it at length with her but haven’t actually shown her a video which I may do. Hopefully that will put her off.

I had mine done at nine and was planning on letting DD have hers done at around a similar age. If she does get them done it will be at a proper piercing place not Claire’s.

Looks awful. Just like my 11year old who would like to wear tops with all her belly on show and hot pants! ( only one in her class not allowed) still not gonna happen matey

I think eleven is early enough. People I know with girls had theirs done at eleven, they asked for them and earrings as a treat post eleven plus. I was actually fourteen but that was years before of course.

Generally little kids don't have ears pierced unless it is a cultural thing and it isn't so with us.

i'm well aware it's not a popular view but i actually think pierced ears on little girls are adorable 😁 my mum had mine done when i was a baby, but she had lived in spain where it's very common. personally i'm glad because it meant i never had to deal with the aftercare and don't remember the pain (obv), and luckily i've never had any trouble with infection or closing over. that said i've told my five year old she can have hers done when she's 10, for the safety reasons pp have discussed. my heavily pierced and tattooed hisband says she has to wait until she's 18 and i've told him he's a knob

At 5, not a chance. I have 4 girls, the oldest of them is 13, the youngest 3. My 13 year old for quite a few years and was told no, she could have them done when she is a teenager.

On her 13th Birthday I took her to a reputable tattoo/piercing parlour and was given the choice of needle piercing or gun, she choose the gun (which I wasn't really happy about but had given her the choice) and she had them done. She said it was extra special having them done on her first teen Birthday and was glad she hadn't had them done earlier. My 11 year old daughter keeps asking and she has had the same answer, she can have them done when she's a teenager.