DD Aged 5 wants her ears pierced!

[PFB1]

DD is asking me to have her ears pierced. I initially said she can once she's older but she's really keen to have it done.

Is 5 way too young? My mum was extremely strict so I don't feel like I have any guide as to what is reasonable and what's not.

Would appreciate some advice.

Thanks.

I had mine done when I was 12, my DC can have theirs done at the same age if they want.

I had mine done at 6. I'd wanted for ages (probably few months). Mum explained what would happen, that it'd hurt etc. I was still insistent for a few more months, so they got them done for my 6th birthday.

I was so pleased!

It's her body. If she understands the process and you feel she'll comply with you cleaning them etc then I'd get them done at the summer holidays.

It’s a body modification, albeit a small, socially normal one.

Mine will be waiting until they’re 16

I was 13 and had to take full responsibility for keeping my ears clean and healthy. A five year old can't do that and I'll be following suit with DD and making her wait.

I also have to be honest and say that I hate seeing real earrings on young children. How about playing for time with stick on alternatives?

Dd pestered me for a year @4-5. Told her it hurts and she would need to clean them etc. Took her and dd 6 and she smiled while they did them. Unlike dd 6 who screamed hysterically!! Once we left the place both were happy!! No regrets.
Cleaned them diligently and no problems at all.
Now 12+13 and none traumatised.

I let DD at 8, no issues. She looked after them perfectly.

I have always had the opinion that as soon as they ask then they are old enough.
My daughter has decided she would like hers done for her 6th next year. I've explained it hurts for a second and she seems to understand.

Too young.
They need to understand not only that it will hurt but also be able to undertake aftercare. I'm heavily pierced myself but won't allow DD aged 6 to have hers done until she's much older.
If you do go ahead please don't even consider Claire's Accessories. Go to a real piercer.

I'd say maybe about 10. 5 is too young to make a change to her body and too young to look after them. Plus it looks tacky imo.

A good opportunity to practice 'no'; you'll be needing it a lot more as she gets older.

Time to decide your rules and red lines.
On this subject my red line was not until the end of primary school both so DD would be mature enough to look after them properly, and also because in my personal view they look awful on young children.

My DD asked recently (also 5). I think she'd seen a friend at school with earrings and wanted them too, but had no real idea of how they actually got there so I showed her a video.

She no longer wants her ears pierced

Say no. It is allowed

My dd asked in reception year if she could have them done. I checked the school policy which was fine, and then explained how it would hurt and we would have to clean and turn them daily and that might be painful. I was hoping it would change her mind but she was adamant she would like them done so we did.

Too her credit she was great at allowing me to clean them and turn them. I was hoping she would be older but I wasn't against them being done earlier as long as she understood it would hurt.

I think its fine for you to decide what age.

I had mine done at 7 and I think I was the first.

I think at 5 is too young imo.. I would wait till at least juniors.

I would give her an age... Its good to wait for some things in life and I think it is important for children not to get everything they want the minute they want it.

It is also the practicality ... I work at school and the number of girls who come in because the ear has torn when taking off jumpers horse play ...

As soon as they ask they are old enough???

Mine wanted a tattoo when she was five!!!

Ridiculous thing to say. Do you give them everything they ask for?

Ears continue to grow until a child is about 11yo, so I would say no any younger than that because otherwise the home can end up too low down.

My DD has asked for all sorts of things I don't want her to have. I say no and suffer her protests until she moves on to wanting something new wanting guinea pigs was 4 days of crying and begging

I let DD have her ears pierced when she was 13. She totally understood what was involved and was able to chose between a needle and a disposable gun.

I had mine pierced at 5. I think piercing ears as a baby is wrong but at 5 they're old enough to understand that it'll hurt and they'll have holes in their ears and make their own decision

@ohamIreally there's always one!
No, I don't give my children everything they ask for.
I think it's important that she has asked for them. I didn't ask, offer, encourage etc she has seen them on her sisters and asked. I said how about next year for your birthday- that's almost 9 months away- she said yes. It's not a crazy on the spot decision, she understands it will hurt and she will have time to have a think about it. She often talks about having different kinds of earrings in etc and we now look at them in shops.

I've discovered a great answer! It's in two parts, first of all I let DD wear the clip on ones, which get sore after a while so that puts her off
Second I've told DD that she will get her ears pierced by a proper piercer (ie at a tattooist) and the one we've chosen won't do it until she's 14.
She's never asked me once, but likes playing with mine - I let her practice taking mine out and putting them back in again (in my ears obvs!)

I tell my dds that once they remember to actually brush their hair then I'll consider it. At this rate it's not happening before they're 20
In all seriousness, you have to decide where your line is and go with that. For me, it's unnecessary at primary age and dangerous so my dc can have it done in the summer holiday at the end of year 6. This is the age Dh and I have agreed on and I'm not interested in what other parents choose to do.

Personally I think five is way too young. They play lots of energetic and physical games, which increases the risk of catching the earring and causing pain or even tearing the ear lobe. Yes, she could play more carefully and be wary of catching the earrings, but surely five is an age where children don’t need their activity curtailed by something that is just for adornment.

Then there is the issue that other posters have discussed of the school rules - if your school says that earrings have to be taken out for PE, how well is your dd going to cope with the discomfort of taking them out and the (probable) pain of putting them back in.

And finally - children are keen on lots of things - not all of which are suitable or age appropriate - it is up to you as the parent to decide if you think something is suitable (not to mention affordable and practical),and if you decide something isn’t appropriate/affordable/practical, saying No to them won’t damage them irreparably.

Dd1 had hers done at 9 and despite daily cleaning she managed to sleep on one funny and it got stuck inside her ear. We had to go up to a&e to have it removed as the ear lobe had swollen around the piercing.

A year later she has asked to have them re-done. I have said only if we can find somewhere who will pierce with small hoops and during the 6 week holidays (dd2 6 also wants hers done) I'm kind of hoping she goes off the idea or forgets by then.

Gosh I got mine done at 18 months!