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Original poster

So upset - school trip

151 replies

princessdonna87 · 01/12/2018 00:30

Hi ladies

My daughter (9) was due to go to a panto today. Like a lot of schools we use parentpay. The trip went online on 24 Sep, I paid 25 Sep.

Imagine my surprise when I get home from work to be told by the childminder that my daughter hadn't been allowed to go on the trip as her permission slip was late. Instead, she'd been sat in the reception area all day on an ipad.

Nobody told me she wasn't going, nobody mentioned the slip (I'm pretty sure this was on time, and at any rate it's been 2 months since!)

She was naturally very upset. Especially as kids who hadn't paid got to take the places of kids who were off sick that had paid.

I've emailed the school but obviously it's the weekend, so no reply til at least Monday but I am so so so upset I could cry!!

My daughter looks forward to things more than most due to what she's been through and she only joined the school in September (she lost her dad last year to suicide, and her gran last month unexpectedly, she's moved home and school etc)

She'd been telling everyone about this trip for weeks - I could cry I am so upset!!!!

I don't care about the money, though I would like it refunded - I just don't know how the school can make this any better? She's really upset but not the type of child to make a big deal to other people as she's shy.

She said 2 other kids were also not allowed to go because their slips were late.

Ironically the kids who hadn't paid - their parents were phoned to ask for consent this morning.

I wasn't phoned or contacted in any way!!!!!!

OP posts:
mamaduckbone · 01/12/2018 08:58

I absolutely agree with previous posters - I’d be livid if this were my child, and I’m a teacher who has untold experience of parents marching in complaining about x,y and z with no good reason!

There is no excuse for the school to have left your daughter behind - you had paid for the trip and returned a consent slip (it’s irrelevant whether it was late).

Definitely take her out of school for a lovely day out, and I would expect a refund from school as well. The school can’t put this right, but as her mum you can make it up to her!

Frazzled2207 · 01/12/2018 09:00

If some schools can do a tick box for consent on parentpay why can't others?

Permissions slips sound like a nightmare to me-
Our school still does them. Surely with the best will in the world some will go missing and it's very admin intensive sorting it out. I'm sure school staff have far more worthwhile things to do (not saying that permission isn't necessary but come on guys it's 2018!)

ForalltheSaints · 01/12/2018 09:14

It seems bad in this age that payment cannot be indicated as giving permission, via a tick box. The worst thing about this is that the school could have said weeks ago that the deadline had been missed and the OPs DD could not go.

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General education
iluvsummer · 01/12/2018 09:17

Teacher here too, that’s awful! I spend the week before the trip sending out permission slips to those who haven’t returned them and I do so daily until I get it back! On the day of the trip if I haven’t had a slip back I’ll ring for verbal permission and get the parent to sign the slip retrospectively. I’d be questioning why this wasn’t done and be making an appointment to find out why!

StripeyDeckchair · 01/12/2018 09:17

Parent pay has a facility whereby the parent completes the permission slip when paying - emergency contact details, medical details, the lot.
You have to complete it when paying

Result - no lost permission slips. All permissions & info in the same place & format.

Why isn't your school using it?

NellieBee · 01/12/2018 09:20

I'd be booking a meeting with the board of governors first thing mONDAY MORNING.

Oblomov18 · 01/12/2018 09:20

This is really poor. Thus just lacks common sense.

rainbowstardrops · 01/12/2018 09:35

Oh your poor daughter 
I'd definitely have very stern words on Monday!

MrsWombat · 01/12/2018 10:03

As a school admin officer, I am finding it very that they haven't contacted you at any point to chase the permissions slip. We would have taken a quick email or text as confirmation for a last minute oversight. I am also finding it hard to believe that she was in the school reception all day. Are you sure it wasn't the reception class with the 5 year olds?

I would definitely be looking at the school complaints procedure (probably on the website) and sending an email in before Monday.

seven201 · 01/12/2018 10:10

Your poor daughter. Whilst I don't think schools should have to spend time chasing parents about things all the time, in this instance they should have just called you to ask about the slip. It's the fact they let replacement kids without slips or money go at the last minute that makes it so rubbish. And especially as your daughter has had such a hard time lately. It's really shitty of them.

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 01/12/2018 10:11

@iluvsummer would you be able to get permission on the day for a ticketed event where the tickets were bought in advance though? It’s not quite as simple as lots of other trips because it’s going to rely on the theatre having kept enough spaces around each school’s block booking in order to accommodate a late slip.

I’d be fuming, but I don’t think attributing this to anything but a complete cock up at this point is helpful. Realistically, I think the OP needs to find out how a permission slip she thought was on time ended up being considered late and why the school didn’t tell her earlier that it was late and her DD wouldn’t be going.

Betaday · 01/12/2018 10:17

This is my worst nightmare- but “kids who hadn't paid got to take the places of kids who were off sick that had paid“ doesn’t make sense- the school must have contacted those parents to ask permission so why couldn’t they do they same for your DD?

MrsWombat · 01/12/2018 10:17

I've just read the thread again Blush and the slip was handed in on time or at least well before the trip. This really does not make sense. I can only think that the slip was lost so they didn't book her place in the the first place, not realising that it had been paid on parent pay. Very shoddy either way.

MsJolly · 01/12/2018 10:23

I’m another who thinks maybe the permission slip was lost and payments weren’t cross referenced with permission slips in.
I would definitely be speaking to the class teacher on Monday with a quick escalation to the head. No point going to governors yet as you have to have followed the school complaints policy-it should be up on the school website so check that out first and follow it to the letter.
So sorry for your DD and yes take her out for a treat Flowers

BitOutOfPractice · 01/12/2018 10:25

Oh goodness that's so awful and upsetting. I'd love to hear the excuse on Monday. Hope your dd is ok.

Disfordarkchocolate · 01/12/2018 10:27

I've been called by the school once to ask me to drop in and sign a permission slip that day. Our school payment app has an option to give permission too. I'd be furious and would definitely take her to panto if I could afford it.

TheMightyToosh · 01/12/2018 10:36

This is awful! Glad to see so many teachers and school support staff giving advice, so you can confidently give the school hell on Monday!

FabulouslyGlamorousFerret · 01/12/2018 13:24

There must be more to this, surely? Let me just clarify. You paid but forgot the permission slip? Other children didn't pay, nor have a permission slip? So, rather than just ringing you for verbal permission - they chose children that hadn't paid and rang their parents for verbal permission?

Did they try to call you and you didn't answer? clutching at straws here

I'm genuinely shocked at this!

00100001 · 02/12/2018 10:29

OP had paid and had permission, but for some reason the school decided because it was late, she couldn't go, and OP somehow knows that children were off sick, and she knows which children didn't pay, and somehow knows that their parents were rung for permission? HOW DO YOU KNOW THIS??? Confused

Apple23 · 02/12/2018 11:52

You need to find out what happened. Something has gone badly wrong with the school's communication systems.

If the trip was wholly within the school day, parents need to be informed but consent is not required (assuming you are in England, don't know about elsewhere).
Two possibilities:

  1. Is it possible the reply slip was only for parents to refuse consent, the teacher had the slip and the office had the money?
  2. Could your DD's father have contacted the school to refuse consent? Schools accept consent from one parent but if the other refuses, the "No" trumps the "Yes".

However, in both cases, if a child was clearly expecting to be on the trip that morning, the school should have rung to check. They definitely have the right contact details, don't they?

Aside from that, she should not have just been sat in a Reception area on an iPad. Did she have unsupervised Internet access during this time?

Contact the head and find out exactly what happened. You should get all of your money back and, assuming school is in the wrong, an apology.

ChippyMinton · 02/12/2018 11:56

@Apple23 - please go back and read the OP and get your insensitive Post deleted before the OP sees it.
And next time RTFT.

brizzledrizzle · 02/12/2018 11:58

Especially as kids who hadn't paid got to take the places of kids who were off sick that had paid.

Presumably they phoned the parents for consent - which is what they should have done with the OP.

Wednesdaypig · 02/12/2018 12:07

Omg, what a lack of communication from school ! Poor dd. One thing, your Parentpay, has it been set to your new school? and is your dd on the class list in the office where they 'follow up' things? Schools I've worked in sometimes update stuff on Sims but the print outs don't match up! I'm assuming this morning you said have a good time at the panto so did your dd not feel she could speak up and say something when she knew you were expecting her to go? I'm surprised no one contacted you, but again, are their contact lists up to date etc?

Absolutely take her out and go to the panto yourselves. You both need a grovelling apology from the school

Witchend · 02/12/2018 12:14

I'd be booking a meeting with the board of governors first thing mONDAY MORNING.
Because the group of voluntary people are just waiting for a phone call on Monday morning to come and have a meeting about something that will probably be sorted out at form teacher level.

It doesn't really add up. They phoned parents who hadn't paid to ask for consent, but not you who'd only sent the form back late, so they had it?
Firstly, how do you know they did this?
Secondly schools can't demand payment, it has to be voluntary, so why would they do that? If they knew those parents couldn't pay then they're not allowed to exclude on that basis, so why would they choose to phone those parents rather than you?
Next, if it was a full school trip, then it would be far more hassle to have children still in school. If it was just her class, then schools would tend to put her into another class rather than in the reception area. I've never seen a school reception area that isn't rather squished.

Yes get clarification, but I would suspect something else went on-you didn't strike out the wrong box and tick "I do NOT give permission" instead?

SheCameFromGreeceSheHadaThirst · 02/12/2018 12:17

I’d also want to know how they managed to get permission from the parents of non paying children but not yours as a paying parent.

That seems really odd

That does seem very odd - though I'm confused how the OP knows that, as it's not as if the school were likely to say 'yeah, we didn't bother ringing princessdonna even though we know she'd paid, but we rang some other non-paying parents instead' Confused

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