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Original poster

So upset - school trip

151 replies

princessdonna87 · 01/12/2018 00:30

Hi ladies

My daughter (9) was due to go to a panto today. Like a lot of schools we use parentpay. The trip went online on 24 Sep, I paid 25 Sep.

Imagine my surprise when I get home from work to be told by the childminder that my daughter hadn't been allowed to go on the trip as her permission slip was late. Instead, she'd been sat in the reception area all day on an ipad.

Nobody told me she wasn't going, nobody mentioned the slip (I'm pretty sure this was on time, and at any rate it's been 2 months since!)

She was naturally very upset. Especially as kids who hadn't paid got to take the places of kids who were off sick that had paid.

I've emailed the school but obviously it's the weekend, so no reply til at least Monday but I am so so so upset I could cry!!

My daughter looks forward to things more than most due to what she's been through and she only joined the school in September (she lost her dad last year to suicide, and her gran last month unexpectedly, she's moved home and school etc)

She'd been telling everyone about this trip for weeks - I could cry I am so upset!!!!

I don't care about the money, though I would like it refunded - I just don't know how the school can make this any better? She's really upset but not the type of child to make a big deal to other people as she's shy.

She said 2 other kids were also not allowed to go because their slips were late.

Ironically the kids who hadn't paid - their parents were phoned to ask for consent this morning.

I wasn't phoned or contacted in any way!!!!!!

OP posts:
PeachCokeZero · 01/12/2018 02:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Hidingtonothing · 01/12/2018 02:13

Nothing constructive to say, just sending you a hug OP Flowers Love PP's idea of taking her next week, definitely do that.

user1andonly · 01/12/2018 02:52

Oh, your poor little girl, I feel so bad for her Flowers

Any of my three would have been devastated by this. As would I. Poor things must have been so bored and sad all day.

Do you know the parents of the other children who didn't go? I would be looking to make a joint complaint.

Punishing the children for something beyond their control - without giving the parents chance to sort it. Nasty.

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Lozsawyer · 01/12/2018 03:08

Disgusting and I am a teacher x

whaletastic · 01/12/2018 03:09

It sound like your family has been through a lot. I'd use this opportunity to spend some quality time together and (as PP have said) go on a school day.

tinstar · 01/12/2018 03:24

In what scenario would someone who wasn't prepared to permit their child to go still pay for the trip? That's so ridiculous.

Your poor dd. I'd be furious too.

Mummyoflittledragon · 01/12/2018 03:43

The school clearly doesn’t have a good pastoral record. Excluding children, whose parents Pay but fill slips in late. Not supporting a child, who has recently lost a parent. I would be writing the head a very strong email pointing out they have failed your child and asking how they are going to address it. What a lack of basic human decency! Your poor dd. How humiliating.

I’m sorry you’re going through such a tough time. Flowers

MissWimpyDimple · 01/12/2018 07:08

I'm not usually the sort to be outraged but I'm actually gobsmacked. The school has some serious issues there and I would make an enormous fuss over this.

How unbelievably petty of them. Is this the sort of thing they do in other areas of school life?

Your poor DD. How ridiculous.

MinecraftMother · 01/12/2018 07:21

Same @MissWimpyDimple

OP - I'm so sorry for you and your DD. I'd be writing a fucker of a letter to the school, governors and maybe even the LA, if that's a thing?

I'd be letting them know I won't stand for this shit for as long as that child is at their school. They'd treat you with kid gloves from then on...

Belindabauer · 01/12/2018 07:28

Wow. What a balls up. How horrible for your child. Why on earth didn't school ring you?

Miscible · 01/12/2018 07:34

Surely by paying you gave permission?

YearOfYouRemember · 01/12/2018 07:36

Your poor dd.

ResponsibleMushroomForager · 01/12/2018 07:37

So sorry for you and your DD.

How does your DD know that the parents of the kids who hadn't paid were telephoned for consent? Was this done in her presence? Shock

Maryjoyce · 01/12/2018 07:39

To take another child with your money must cross into some legal issue for sure.
And to ring and ask permission on the morning off unpaying parents surely means they had no permission slips atvall fir them children so it seems they have crossed many lines here.
Deffinately they must return your money and I’d make official complaints and take it as far as possible if you don’t get a apology and answers that you are happy over.

Mayra1367 · 01/12/2018 07:40

Makes no sense for the parents of children who had not paid to be contacted.
Are you sure they have the correct phone number for you ?
In terms of risk assessments the slips would of been checked days ago to make sure everything was in order . Something very strange here .

Feefeetrixabelle · 01/12/2018 07:40

This school needs a rocket up the arse. If the slip was late does that mean they actually had it all along? Or had it not been returned at all?

I would be expecting an apology not only to you but for the adults to apologise to your daughter. And I would be telling them that the day you take her out of school to go to panto will be recording as authorised absence and will not affect any entitlement to any attendance awards she may be eligible for.

I’d also want an explanation as to what kind of education they were providing sitting her on an iPad all day.

wheresmyliveship · 01/12/2018 07:40

From a safeguarding perspective, I can’t believe they didn’t inform you about your child’s whereabouts. We call parents urgently on the morning of a trip if their child can’t go because they’ve forgotten their asthma pump/epipen etc (secondary). You have a right to question why you weren’t told that your child wasn’t in the place you expected her to be!

madroid · 01/12/2018 07:44

I feel furious for you. How mean and spiteful to punish the children for the parents fault in not returning the permission slip. Not saying you haven't - just sounds like such a mean spirited thing to do to children at Christmas anyway.

I hope they apologize and learn and you get the pleasure of taking your daughter.

MyOtherProfile · 01/12/2018 07:46

Im so shocked at this I don't know what to say.

chocatoo · 01/12/2018 07:49

Look on School website at the complaints policy and raise it as a formal complaint, that way they have to take your complaint seriously. What a shitty thing to do to your child.

AnElderlyLadyOfMediumHeight · 01/12/2018 07:54

'I would be expecting an apology not only to you but for the adults to apologise to your daughter. And I would be telling them that the day you take her out of school to go to panto will be recording as authorised absence and will not affect any entitlement to any attendance awards she may be eligible for. -'

This, and if it were me, I would be telling them that a hisper of an unsatisfactory response and Ofsted would be finding out, at the next inspection at the latest.

ADastardlyThing · 01/12/2018 07:54

"Especially as kids who hadn't paid got to take the places of kids who were off sick that had paid."

so some parents sent in a permission slip but didn't pay?

On parent pay doesn't it say payment is also providing permission? It does on ours.

I'd suggest there's more to this.

AnElderlyLadyOfMediumHeight · 01/12/2018 07:55

Whisper, not hisper, obv.

fizzicles · 01/12/2018 07:56

This just sounds bizarre. At my school we would be chasing up permission slips for days to ensure everyone could go on the trip. They said she couldn't go because it was late? So you had completed the permission slip and returned it to school?

I just cannot understand why this would occur. It's not in the school's interests to have a kid sitting watching an iPad all day.

NotAnotherJaffaCake · 01/12/2018 07:59

Schools also don’t need permission to take children on trips that occur wholly within the school day, so if they left after the school day and came back before the end, they are doubly incompetent for not knowing the situation regarding permission!

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