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Original poster

So upset - school trip

151 replies

princessdonna87 · 01/12/2018 00:30

Hi ladies

My daughter (9) was due to go to a panto today. Like a lot of schools we use parentpay. The trip went online on 24 Sep, I paid 25 Sep.

Imagine my surprise when I get home from work to be told by the childminder that my daughter hadn't been allowed to go on the trip as her permission slip was late. Instead, she'd been sat in the reception area all day on an ipad.

Nobody told me she wasn't going, nobody mentioned the slip (I'm pretty sure this was on time, and at any rate it's been 2 months since!)

She was naturally very upset. Especially as kids who hadn't paid got to take the places of kids who were off sick that had paid.

I've emailed the school but obviously it's the weekend, so no reply til at least Monday but I am so so so upset I could cry!!

My daughter looks forward to things more than most due to what she's been through and she only joined the school in September (she lost her dad last year to suicide, and her gran last month unexpectedly, she's moved home and school etc)

She'd been telling everyone about this trip for weeks - I could cry I am so upset!!!!

I don't care about the money, though I would like it refunded - I just don't know how the school can make this any better? She's really upset but not the type of child to make a big deal to other people as she's shy.

She said 2 other kids were also not allowed to go because their slips were late.

Ironically the kids who hadn't paid - their parents were phoned to ask for consent this morning.

I wasn't phoned or contacted in any way!!!!!!

OP posts:
Mayra1367 · 01/12/2018 08:01

In reference to paying being accepted as permission, our school insists on a written permission slip with contact phone number of where you will be on the day. It’s unbelievable the amount of parents who change number and never think to tell the school.

KitNCaboodle · 01/12/2018 08:04

I’m utterly shocked at this.
First thing Monday, call the school for clarification and justification of what happened. Then follow with an email to the Head and the Governors.

Your poor daughter. I absolutely agree with the PP who said to ask for a refund and take your daughter to the panto on another school day, all the while insisting it goes down as an authorised absence.

Lessons need to be learnt from this.

GreenFieldsofFrance · 01/12/2018 08:04

I could see this easily happening at our school. They have this hybrid "system" where sometimes you pay online and ticking a box is taken as giving permission, and then other times it's payment and a separate slip in the bag, other times a form emailed from the office. I've not yet mucked it up but I bet plenty do and I will too one day.

Totally agree with the idea to take your dd to the Panto on a school day.

Interested in this thread?

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General education
Podemos · 01/12/2018 08:06

Are you in England? Private or state? State English schools can't charge for trips - only ask for a voluntary contribution so no idea why children who hadn't paid would be offered last minute - they should have always been going.

As a teacher who is really fed up at the moment of parents complaining over the most ridiculous things, I say REALLY kick up a fuss about this. Head, governors, even Ofsted. Complaints procedure should be on the website (although this school seems to follow it's own rules so ring up and ask for contact details of chair of governors).

Really there is nothing the school can do now to make this right. I feel so so sad for your daughter.

WoodyOak · 01/12/2018 08:08

Schools legally need parent/carer permission to take pupils out of school grounds even if the trip has been paid for. I have pretty much hounded parents for permission slips so that my pupils can go on trips so, especially reading your daugher's history, I would have called you and accepted verbal consent. I have also allowed pupils with permission slips to go on trips without paying because I have known about their families' financial situations.
If I were you, I'd call the school. The other poster's advice of requesting a family day is a good one and I hope your daughter has a lovely time spending a special day with you at a panto.

00100001 · 01/12/2018 08:09

This makes no sense

How do you know which kids didn't pay and how do you know their parents were phoned for permission??

StrongTea · 01/12/2018 08:11

Such a shame for your daughter and the other 2 who didn’t get to go. If you know the other children could you all have an outing together?

Redcrayonisthebest · 01/12/2018 08:12

Oh Gosh! Am not one to suggest marching down to the school but this is awful, the fact that they didn't contact you in the run up, they phoned other parents but not you, also, the fact that she got left sitting in the reception area with an iPad is a disgrace, so yes, go and make a fuss then take her out for a Christmas themed day. So sorry for your tough year op!!

BirdieInTheHand · 01/12/2018 08:16

This is deliberately spiteful behaviour on the part of the school. Your poor daughter

HarveySchlumpfenburger · 01/12/2018 08:18

THat’s not quite true, podemos. It only applies to some trips, although schools are likely to have some system to help parents pay for the extra trips if they are struggling financially.

Definitely go in and ask them to find out how this happened and how they are going to make sure it doesn’t happen again.

Strictly1 · 01/12/2018 08:20

I'm furious for you. They should have been chasing slips last week. I'm so sorry for your daughter.

Frazzled2207 · 01/12/2018 08:22

I'm furious on your behalf op.

It makes no sense at all, there must have been some misunderstanding, such as the school thought you'd explicitly not given consent.

I hope you can make it up to her.

AtSea1979 · 01/12/2018 08:26

This is awful. I would be very concerned about their general behaviour towards their pupils if this is how they treat them on a day that’s supposed to be special. How do they treat them on a normal day when a child displays minor behaviour?

I wouldn’t just email them. I’d make a formal complaint.
If you can get the time off work then def take her to panto or do something special.

tinstar · 01/12/2018 08:34

Schools legally need parent/carer permission to take pupils out of school grounds even if the trip has been paid for.

If that's true, and payment isn't proof enough of permission, then they should have been chasing slips days before the trip. And particularly in the OP's DD's case.

theSnuffster · 01/12/2018 08:36

I'd be furious! If they had no permission slip but you'd paid surely it's obviously you wanted her to go and they could've just contacted you to ask for the slip? If you didn't want her to go you wouldn't have paid?! Plus if it's okay for those who hadn't paid (therefore I assume hadn't given them a permission slip?) to give permission over the phone why on earth couldn't they have phoned you and dealt with it over the phone? So basically one of those children used the ticket you paid for!

topcat2014 · 01/12/2018 08:40

How stupid - surely by paying you have obviously given "permission".

Mississippilessly · 01/12/2018 08:44

Teacher here. This story is terrible. We chase permission slips if we are missing them and as long as we have it the child goes - even if its handed to us as they get on the coach!
I would give her a day off and take her.

Quartz2208 · 01/12/2018 08:45

Yes definitely speak to the school

VisitorsEntrance · 01/12/2018 08:45

Whenever I run trips I spend the few days before chasing up permission slips.
I want this to not be true because I don’t want to believe a school would do this.
Why were you not phoned?
Why was she in the office all day rather than in another class?
How do you know about the other children and phoning for permission?

Bitlost · 01/12/2018 08:46

OP, i’m so sorry for what you’ve been through.

Like someone else said, i’d be concerned about what else is going on at the school. They sound like complete imbeciles. And in any event, kids who didn’t should have been attending classes instead. I’d make a proper complaint to school and the LEA (if applicable).

eatingtomuch · 01/12/2018 08:47

MAy DC school has parent pay. When they originally had it (it started while DC at the school) we still had to send in permission slips. However, that soon changed and now we tick a box on parent pay that comes up for each trip, it states that by paying for the trip you are giving permission for your child to attend (or something like that). It's far easier and must save the school time trying to get in the slips. I would be making this recommendation to your DD's school.

I also agree that what they did was awful and I'd be requesting a meeting with the head teacher on Monday.

tempester28 · 01/12/2018 08:49

If this has been done to punish you for the late reply (assuming they had the slip but that it hadn't been in by X date) I would be looking for a different school. Because if this is the case and they had the slip and knew your child would not be allowed to go and didn't let you know then they are cruel and not the type of school you would want your child at.

If someone in the office has decided that someone who hasn't paid or replied can get a last minute call and be allowed to go. Using the ticket of someone who has paid and sent their reply in before the day of the panto but later than requested - Then the person who devised this policy should be severely reprimanded. If it is the head then write to the governor's.

I would complain in person by asking for a meeting with the head.

strawberrypenguin · 01/12/2018 08:49

I agree with everyone else. You had paid, they clearly had the permission slip as well it was just 'late'. They then phoned other parents who hadn't paid for permission. This makes no sense on their behalf at all. Even taking your DD's circumstances out of this I would hit the roof. With them it's even worse.

Sitting in reception all day on an iPad is terrible as well. Surely they could have found them something to do.

I'd be in the heads office first thing Monday demanding an explanation.

bananasandwicheseveryday · 01/12/2018 08:50

@Podemos - you are only partly correct.
When a trip is curriculum related, we are only allowed to ask for a voluntary donation. This ensures that children are not disadvantaged if a parent does not pay, although, if insufficient parents choose to pay, a trip may be cancelled. Trips which are 'fun', can be charged in full and children whose parents don't pay, don't go, although there may be arrangements by individual schools to assist parents of Pupil Premium children. Some schools, ours is one, have parents sign a general permission for trips which take place entirely within the school day AND which do not involve any vehicular transport. Our school is within walking distance of several local venues - swimming pool, theatre etc, and trips to these are covered by the general permission as children can walk to those.

As a governor, I would not be happy with this situation and I would definitely want go know why you were not contacted to ask permission. Who was looking after your dd when everyone else was out? What was the cut off date for the permission slip? Why, when yours was 'late', were you not contacted at that time? Since they knew that the slip was 'late', why did they not refund you the money you had already paid? This is a huge error on the part of the school and they need to ensure this can never happen again. Sadly, it will not make up for your dd missing a fun activity with her friends. I have never before advocated taking a child out of school for anything 'fun', but in this case I absolutely would. And I'd put it in writing why.

nottakingthisanymore · 01/12/2018 08:53

School have really mucked this up. Given your family’s circumstances they should have been particularly sensitive. We have phoned parents on the morning of a trip and got verbal consent. Any person with an ounce of common sense can see that payment implies consent. I feel very sorry for your dd and I hope you can take her to the show soon.