Oh for goodness sake. I have a crush on the builder

[Keyra]

I’m such a cliche - middle aged sahm crushing on the builder. I need strategies to look busy and keep out of the way.

There absolutely aren't any cat/pussy jokes I can make! That would be very much running before walking! I'm still working my way up to looking him in the eye for more than 2 seconds!

Not a redhead Lucy although I've always wished I was.

Your plan for tomorrow, Keyra..

CB has offered to show you his cat pics.

So tomorrow, say 'Hi, CB. Don't forget you promised you'd show me your pussy pics'.

The line must be delivered completely dead pan with just a HINT of raised eyebrow.

He will LOVE it and will think you're a total minx.

I love the cat/pussy joke OP it’ll break the ice

OP cant believe i have just found this thread. Have read/snorted my through it out loud to my DH whos a builder. Tomorrows staff meeting will be a list of appropriate biscuit to accept & further discussions about accepting a bacon roll alone in the kitchen 🤣.
His perspective is.. CG is actually being a wingman for CB because
A) he was being openly flirty
B) he openly told you CB likes you

He thinks CG is trying to wind CB up coz he knows he likes you and he was probably trying to find out if you fancied CB for CB when he revealed he liked you.
He says to make tea n give it to CG with a plate of plain digestives & one huge fancy biccy every day & tell him them the fancy one is just for CB.
Biscuit code for green to go 😁 Good luck

You could get some of these especially for CB

Keyra, I have fantasized about having a bff like you all my life. Please will you be my friend?
P.S. Good luck with cb. Hope it works out. Get your extension completed first though. Focus!

@NancyDonahue [big grin]

whoops that didn't work

I'm already excited for today's instalment! Will there be locked eyes over a chocolate hobnob?? A brush of hands whilst cooing over cat pics??  hope today goes well and he doesn't get sent away again!

Sass - thank you for the insider perspective. I’m inclined to agree with your DHs assessment of the situation.

Good morning all. Sassie very grateful for interpretation of the situation from a rl builder! And OkGoogle that's such a lovely thing to say but I am very very boring I promise!

Cg had a cup of tea waiting for me when I got downstairs this morning - he has a key so in the mornings lets himself in. That was really nice to come down to but cb was late so it was just the two of us for half an hour or so. And when he arrived cg ushered him outside straight away :(

I did get time to see that the teeth were out though - maybe he didn't have time to get them in if he was running late. They do, or rather their absence does, terrible things to me! I think he might do the bathroom ceiling later so potential chance to talk. I'm off to practice my lines!

Ushered him outside straight away.... clearly doesn't want cg swooping in and stealing ya

Oh bugger, misread. I thought CB ushered CG out straight away

Keyra here's my current thinking (as a fellow useless-at-talking-to-people-i-fancy sufferer)

If there's a glimmer that CB likes you, and we know he's a bit shy, then I reckon even the mildest compliment from you is going to mean something to him. So can you find something to compliment him on? Doesn't have to be "ooh what firm biceps you have!" Could just be telling him he's done a good job with the ceiling and a sincere smiley "thank you". Think about it - if you were in his position that would make you go all fluttery!

Op. In light that CG MAY be a wingman.. can i suggest at this stage finding yourself a good wingwoman who could
A) Engage in convo with CG to at least let u get a word in to CB
B) Accidentally, on purpose, tell CG u like CB by handing over the tea & echoing CGs words of " You do know Keyra likes CB dont you?"
That way you havent actually said a word or made a move. Classic wingman tactics. Lol . Get your mate or neighbour in n nudge them to go for it for you x

This thread is wonderful!

This is so hilarious.

The builder has a key, lets himself in and makes you a brew

@ Double crème biscuits

I think he might do the bathroom ceiling later so potential chance to talk. I'm off to practice my lines!

^

You're very witty op, brilliant

@double cream biscuits!!

It's like a porn movie

I've a couple days off so I can watch this thread in real time now

Is anyone else slightly concerned on op's behalf that chatty builder is getting wrong end of stick and is ever so slightly laying the foundations So to speak for himself ? He's not letting op get a look in with crushy builder is he? I'm quite anxious about this op . As previous poster suggested is there anyone close that you could ask to start casually intervening on your behalf And head him off at the pass?

Equally concerned Ooogetyooo. Avidly awaiting next update. Cg I think is definitely being obstructive. If cb is in your bathroom you might be able to pop up there and give CG the slip!

I too have grave concerns about CG. I wonder whether him telling you that CB likes you is to gauge your opinion on him eg hoping you'd say something like, "Oh no, I don't think of him like that at all [tinkly laugh], I prefer my men older/with teeth etc".

As a matter of urgency you need to get CG out of the way and get some quality time with CB. Perhaps he could sort out the bathroom ceiling whilst you're covered in strategically placed Radox bubbles and eating a Flake?

Oh oh - something (very small) to report!

Cg nipped off for 30 mins leaving cb doing the bathroom. So I legged it upstairs carrying the laundry basket as my prop but the bathroom door was closed. I lost my nerve last minute and couldn't bring myself to knock on it so thought I might as well actually put the washing away, instead of just pretending to. Was in my ds's room, opposite the bathroom, when out he came.

We engaged in bathroom talk (don't all swoon now) which in itself is progress - a whole conversation. Talk moved on to en suite discussion and I said (you're all going to be so proud of me) "do you want to see mine?' And he said yes! Well I don't suppose he could have said "not really", but anyway.

So not only has he now been in my bedroom, he said "this is a nice bedroom isn't it?". He liked the en suite too but that's by the by!

I have to own up to regretting my bravery and reverting to type by becoming monosyllabic and gazing at the floor once I had him in my room, and he must have been in there for all of 30 seconds, but still.

Tp hasn't shown again but the floor fitter has - he is large and hairy. Kitchen maker also shown - he is quiet and has three bulldogs

Going to read everyone's posts now.

I've caught up! Those biscuits look very, er, continental?

The problem with getting a wingman of my own is that I'd have to admit to my crush, and I think all my rl friends would not be as understanding as you folks! Particularly in light of the teeth (they're in now by the way but definitely weren't earlier). I can probably go down the compliment route and tell him later what a good job he's done of the ceiling even if he hasn't

My progress doesn't look nearly as exciting now I've read it back :(. And the latest exchange was very disappointing:

Me (as I passed him on the landing): I can't find my car keys.
Cb: Oh dear

:(