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Original poster

Please can you help my DD?

278 replies

Teddydilemma · 03/10/2018 19:39

I have name changed because I might show DD this thread.

DD is 10. Since she was a baby she has had a much loved teddy. Currently she sleeps with it and will cuddle it if she is upset. It stays in her bedroom.

Recently she has become convinced that she should not have teddy any more. She thinks others would say it is babyish to still have a teddy.

What do you think? Is it OK for a 10 year old to have a teddy at night? What age should she give it up?

OP posts:
TickTickBoomBoom · 03/10/2018 20:33

My 10 yo DTDs have so many teddies/bunnies that there's hardly space for them on the bed! But the most treasured are the bunnies they got when they were born. They used to be pink and fluffy and are now brown and threadbare, but they refuse to sleep without them. The don't take them on Cub camps as they are too precious, but take a different cuddly. They simply won't sleep without something to cuddle. I sometimes sleep with one of their cuddlies - one is never too old Grin.

shutupandgotosleep · 03/10/2018 20:33

I still have my teddy, and yes I still sleep holding onto it. DH doesn't get a sayso on the teddy situation.

Even though I know full well that his teddy from when he was a baby is still very much in existence and is now loved by the oldest in their bed.

Mamabear4180 · 03/10/2018 20:33

My 15 year old has her favourite teddy on her bed as well as countless fox related stuffed toys and others. Where do kids get these crazy ideas about growing up too fast?

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Thebluedog · 03/10/2018 20:34

My teddy still sits on my bedside table and 45

MirandaWest · 03/10/2018 20:34

My DD is 13 and definitely has her bear. DS is 14 and his bear lingers round the place too

Thebluedog · 03/10/2018 20:34

My 10 yr old still sleeps with her favourite, and a selection of other teddies

Armchairanarchist · 03/10/2018 20:34

DD has lots and lots of teddies. Her favourite comes on every long car journey and holiday too. DD is 12.

Athena51 · 03/10/2018 20:34

I'm 51 and I still have my beloved Black Cat (inventive name eh?) who was a christening present. It's fine, better than fine in fact to have a cuddly toy that you love and cherish as you get older.

I don't have either of my parents around any more and BC is a reminder of how much they loved me .

April2020mom · 03/10/2018 20:35

It’s totally fine.
I still sleep with my childhood teddy bear on my bed. My two children have a toy each which I put on their beds (they are almost 2) now. My 9 year old sister still has a baby blanket someone knitted her when she was a infant. DS also still has a toy and some trinkets some kind soul gave me at the hospital when he was discharged. I’ve kept all them.
There is nothing wrong with it.

IloveSaturdays1 · 03/10/2018 20:35

I'm 30 years old and I still have my monkey :)

DailyMailFail101 · 03/10/2018 20:35

I still have lots of my teddy bears (which sleep in the middle of me and my husband) I also still have my rag dolls at my parents house, I’m in my 30s my Dads in his 60s and still has his childhood bear which sits on a chair in his bedroom,

MagentaRocks · 03/10/2018 20:36

I’m 45 and I still have my first teddy in my bedroom. It was the teddy my dad brought to the hospital when I was born. It has gone everywhere with me.

wildewillow · 03/10/2018 20:37

I lost my teddy on holiday when I was 16 so my mum gave me hers and I've still got him now at 30!

HettySunshine · 03/10/2018 20:37

My teddy is my most loved possession and still lives in the corner of my bed. I'm 39, married and have three children.

My oldest (5) sometimes asks for 'mummy's teddy' when she feels poorly and her own cuddlies aren't cutting it!

Alabasterangel6 · 03/10/2018 20:37

Not suggesting for one minute anyone parts with their bears (my DD is the same age and her bed of filled with them. Plus a hammock above the bed filled with more, plus she has a super special one too) but SHOULD you have an excess of bears as someone unthread asked then there is a charity called Bearly Loved who collect them up and send them overseas to children who really do appreciate them. They have a FB page.

BlueGlasses · 03/10/2018 20:37

My son's 15 and I quite often wake him in the mornings with his ted tucked under his chin. He obviously wouldn't advertise this fact to his mates but what they don't see can't hurt Bear

AnnieAnoniMouse · 03/10/2018 20:38

I’m in my 40’s, my ted sits on my bed and comes to bed with me if I’m alone, she’s too fragile to share with other people these days.

Even now, when I pick her up, she calms me if I’m upset or angry. YEARS of hugs and comfort.

I’m sad she’s so fragile these days, but she’ll out live me 😊🐻

If you’re feeling a little embarassed, she can always go on a shelf, on your mum’s bed or on a chest of drawers etc. At your age she came on family holidays, or to stay at my cousins/nana’s etc, but she didn’t come on my school trips/guides etc type things.

Though DC’s school trips have stated that ALL children are to bring a teddy/cuddly etc.which I think is lovely because then no one feels embarassed.

Whatever you do, you need to keep teddy, you’ll regret not.

Immigrantsong · 03/10/2018 20:38

Aw bless her. I absolutely hate it when our lovely kids feel the pressure to grow up and give up the joys of childhood. Please tell her that her teddy or any other precious belonging of her childhood are not childish. Many people here have already said they have theirs still and she should not feel bad if she wants to keep hers. Ask her why she feels she has to give up something she clearly loves. If its because of people and peer pressure. And explain that real friends and people that love her would never make her feel bad about this. She is not childish. No one is childish for wanting to cherish precious belongings that bring comfort and good memories.

sakuramiyagi · 03/10/2018 20:39

I'm 31 and still have my teddy. He lives in his own wee shelf in the wardrobe. Very much still loved and now lives next to DHs childhood teddy.

Absolutely nothing wrong with keeping a teddy. I would worry she would regret it, if she parted with it.

LittleMissPonsible · 03/10/2018 20:39

I’ve still got mine! They stopped sleeping with my every night when I went to uni - I left them at home, not because I was embarrassed by them, but because I was scared someone else would fall in love with them and pinch them!

VelociraptorRex · 03/10/2018 20:39

I'm 38 and I still have my teddy - he's been around the world with me, into operations with me (and I've come round to find him next to me with a cannula matching mine Grin), he's been through thick and thin with me and still has a treasured place in this house! I think it's a good lesson in doing what feels right for your DD, and not doing something to try and seem "cool" (I've never been cool, for the record).

donajimena · 03/10/2018 20:40

This will only out me if my mother is a mumsnetter but at 46 I still sleep with Lambsy

CloudCaptain · 03/10/2018 20:40

Can you teach her how to brazen out any bullying? A shoulder shrug and a negligent 'i love my ted' with a smile should do the trick or some such.
Some resilience tricks may give her more confidence.
I still have one cuddly. So does dh. Although I have it in a drawer for sentimental reasons.

Starlings27 · 03/10/2018 20:41

I still have my dolly and my mum had her teddy until the day she died. Dolly sits on a shelf. Definitely nothing wrong with keeping a teddy until you feel you don’t want it anymore.

negomi90 · 03/10/2018 20:41

I've gone through a couple, the one I got when I was 7 is always with me. Comes away wherever I'm going to stay over.
My mum was doing a clear out and threatened to clear out the one I had as a baby (and was supplanted by the one). That one was rescued. I now have two on my bed, though only one travels.
The 14 year old girls take their bears everywhere. And on the last family holiday the then 16 year old boy took his (but was very low key about it, and I don't think anyone is supposed to know).
Please show your dd this thread, so that can see you're never too old!

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