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Original poster

CBB 'punch' incident. Views?

784 replies

YeOldeFishWife · 01/09/2018 11:09

Not sure about this as it is highly irritating to have someone jumping around you pretend to 'box' and he could have poked her by accident. She was in a car accident recently and could be tender there. Some could say she had a right to complain even though he was obviously not deliberately trying to hurt her.

The asking for him to be removed from the house (if she did that) and claims that he'd 'beaten her up' were a complete overreaction of though.

OP posts:
ShatnersWig · 03/09/2018 13:09

But frankly hilarious it being discussed on LW when they still haven't apologised for what happened on their own programme last week!

GabsAlot · 03/09/2018 13:25

the woman is manipulative i dont think any therapy woujld help it was calculating what she did

if she had gone straight back in and said sorry i think ive overreacted thne same day i might believe her-but she was standing with theothers crying the next day going hes lying hes lying

zippey · 03/09/2018 13:39

There is a wider point here. Does this mean movements like “we believe you” are fundamentally flawed? People can lie, exaggerate or even misinterpret the behaviour of others.

Whenever you see a thread on here by a man, someone always wonders what the partners point of view would be, whereas women are always believed.

ShatnersWig · 03/09/2018 13:47

@zippey I've aired this many times, I have never agreed with "we believe you" and some of that is due to a personal experience of a friend who was falsely accused and it was only thanks to some CCTV that was eventually found (and to do with some other case, so even luckier) that proved without any doubt whatsoever he couldn't have done what he was accused of.

I personally feel "we're listening" was more appropriate. It's about a complainant feeling they are being properly listened to and properly responded to and that their complaint is taken seriously. How do you believe both an complainant and their alleged accuser? You can't - you can investigate BOTH having listened to both and taken everything they say seriously.

birdsdestiny · 03/09/2018 13:47

No because the default is not to believe the woman. What were you wearing, why did you walk there, but you were drunk. Christ the NI rugby players left a woman bleeding from her vagina and they walked free.

ilovegin112 · 03/09/2018 13:52

lw and coleen must be ecstastic this has come out they’ve completely forgotten their own problem

GunpowderGelatine · 03/09/2018 14:03

I think the worst thing about this whole thing is not the 'false accusation' - Ryan Thomas will be fine, if anything he's got more fans and support than ever. It's the fact that closet misogynists can creep out the woodwork to perpetuate the myth that false accusations against men are common (they're in fact fleetingly rare) and say "See. SEE. This is what women do. Think about that next time your mate's wife accuses him of knocking her about when he probably just brushed past her". I'm not a Roxanne fan but it's not her fault that blame seems to be heaped on women constantly

GunpowderGelatine · 03/09/2018 14:13

I also thinks it's laughable that people are saying "if it hadn't been filmed as evidence his career would have been ruined". Don't be silly. Men are accused of domestic violence, sexual assault, even rape, and still have jobs and support from their fans. Look at Amber Heard who had bruises on her ace FFS, she was branded a liar, gold digger and even on MN, a fairly progressive site WRT women's rights, someone said "If he threw a phone at her she should have ducked" Hmm

If she's come out saying it had happened somewhere where there's no cameras (such as the bathroom) there's have been outcries of "lying bitch, Ryan would never do that because he is good looking/has a girlfriend/loves his Mum" etc etc. Don't be deluded and don't underestimate how little women are regarded in our society.

rainbowsandsmiles · 03/09/2018 14:18

I also thinks it's laughable that people are saying "if it hadn't been filmed as evidence his career would have been ruined". Don't be silly

How can you say that when if there was no camera to catch it, the fact his reputation would have been in tatters and people would be thinking he hit women?
Or does his reputation not matter? To have people thinking that of you when you know you're innocent?
He might have got work, yes, but his character would have been tarnished and that's unforgiveable, sorry.

rainbowsandsmiles · 03/09/2018 14:22

If she's come out saying it had happened somewhere where there's no cameras (such as the bathroom) there's have been outcries of "lying bitch, Ryan would never do that because he is good looking/has a girlfriend/loves his Mum" etc etc.

And THAT is why it is so bloody lucky that there were cameras to catch it, as there would have been seeds of doubt about him - yes, there'd have been "he'd never do that" from some, but you can bet that there'd be lots believing her and that he did.
She was absolutely adamant that she wasn't lying, proper going for it with the tears and turning people against him in the house - without the footage he wouldn't have had a chance.

GunpowderGelatine · 03/09/2018 14:25

The "we believe you" movement was formed after finding that so many women feared not being believed, and it's what held them back from reporting their abuser and/or rapist. It was to assure women that they would be treated in a matter which would be respectful and where the assumption was they were telling the truth - rather than trying to catch them in a lie (which is what many, too many, police officers have done in the past). It's about undoing decades of damage in a patriarchal system whereby the vast majority of female victims never saw justice, and often got blamed themselves for their assault.

It is not about saying "we think he did it as long as you say he did". It's not even about 'him'. It's a movement about victims. And importantly it's called "we believe you" because "we believe you unless it comes to light there is a reason not to, in which case our stance may change" isn't very catchy.

I can't remember the exact figure but off the top of my head only 0.7% of accusations of DV, sexual assault and rape are false. Let's have a movement for the 99.3% please and not complain about it because menz

DioneTheDiabolist · 03/09/2018 14:27

False accusations seem to be quite common for RP.Hmm It is not her fault that men assault women. It's not all her fault that women are disbelieved, but her conduct and lies contribute to the problem.

I think it would have been detrimental to RT's life and career had we not seen what actually happened. False accusations do happen and are devastating for the victims and their families who struggle to even ask for support because of the "there is no smoke without fire" attitudes.Sad

GunpowderGelatine · 03/09/2018 14:27

rainbows - his reputation would not be in tatters. There's video footage of Jonny Depp abusing Amber Heard whilst drinking a pint of wine, and he still has his adoring fans and multi million dollar Hollywood contracts doesn't he. I'm amazed that peopl think Ryan's career would have been even slightly blemished

GunpowderGelatine · 03/09/2018 14:29

False accusations do happen and are devastating for the victims and their families who struggle to even ask for support because of the "there is no smoke without fire" attitudes.

False accusations are extremely rare, and like I've said, I don't believe for a minute that they ruin men's lives. He'll, men proven to be abusers still get plenty of work. Donald Trump, Mike Tyson, Mark Wahlberg, Charlie Sheen - convicted felons (except for Trump but I'm including him because he confessed to being a sexual predator) still in work. Not buying for a moment that a man's life will be ruined by a 'false accusation'. She'd have been lambasted and never work again. He'd have been fine.

DioneTheDiabolist · 03/09/2018 14:30

RT is no Jonny's Depp. I also think that if Amber Heard's story was to come out now, post #MeToo it would be received differently.

rainbowsandsmiles · 03/09/2018 14:31

rainbows - his reputation would not be in tatters

So you'd be perfectly OK with people thinking he might or might not be an abuser then? Even if he'd done nothing wrong?

GunpowderGelatine · 03/09/2018 14:32

Bollocks. It was barely 2 years ago. There was a thread on here at the time with the most awful victim blaming. I said then, and I'll say it now, Jonny Depp could have beaten her up on he red carpet in front of hundreds of cameras and would still be worshipped by dumb fans afterwards, falling over themselves making excuses.

rainbowsandsmiles · 03/09/2018 14:34

False accusations are extremely rare, and like I've said, I don't believe for a minute that they ruin men's lives.

Have you even watched it? Turning people against him, saying he'd properly hurt her, she'd been punched repeatedly, and him crying in the diary room genuinely thinking he'd done something wrong?
What about his mental health from it all? Or doesn't it matter as he's male? Hmm

GunpowderGelatine · 03/09/2018 14:36

I didn't say that rainbows so I'm not sure why you got that impression? I don't especially care what happens to Ryan Thomas, TBH, or Roxanne Pallet (funnily enough my DH used to go out with her before she was famous and can confirm she is a nasty manipulative bully) I'm more annoyed that this whole thing has just given license for misogynists to vent their hate. I'm pretty sure she'll never work again though in the 'industry'. I'll never be convinced that Ryan's reputation would have suffered either way

ShatnersWig · 03/09/2018 14:39

Not buying for a moment that a man's life will be ruined by a 'false accusation'

Jay Cheshire, 17, accused of rape. Voluntarily interviewed by the Police, several weeks of investigations. Police found no evidence and the girl then withdrew her statement. Jay killed himself soon afterwards. It's believe he suffered abuse from people who knew him.

His mother killed herself a year later as she never got over it.

My friend's life was absolutely ruined by the false allegation against him. He lost his job, his marriage broke down, and he turned to drink because despite proof coming out there are always people who think "no smoke without fire". He was attacked in the street. Tried to kill himself. He is now, just about rebuilding his life.

I am willing to accept false allegations are a rare but they do happen. I find it offensive to make the blanket statement that you don't buy for a moment that a man's life will be ruined by a false accusation.

rainbowsandsmiles · 03/09/2018 14:39

I didn't say that rainbows so I'm not sure why you got that impression?

rainbows - his reputation would not be in tatters

False accusations are extremely rare, and like I've said, I don't believe for a minute that they ruin men's lives.

Which is why I asked if you thought his mental health was important - ruining people's lives isn't as straight cut as you seem to think - oh he'll get work, it won't ruin his life. It's not just about that, it's deeper.

GunpowderGelatine · 03/09/2018 14:40

Shatner - the Jay Cheshire case was NOT a false accusation. The victim withdrew her statement. They are very different things

rainbowsandsmiles · 03/09/2018 14:40

I am willing to accept false allegations are a rare but they do happen. I find it offensive to make the blanket statement that you don't buy for a moment that a man's life will be ruined by a false accusation.

Well said.

DioneTheDiabolist · 03/09/2018 14:41

False accusations are extremely rare, and like I've said, I don't believe for a minute that they ruin men's lives.
You may not believe it, but it's true.Sad

Thesearmsofmine · 03/09/2018 14:42

So you don’t think men could lose any work, relationships, have contact with children affected due to a false accusation made against them? Plenty would have been gunning for Ryan if this hadn’t have been caught on camera, many would believed he had hurt her from her lies, some who were in the house believed her.