So embarrassed - too fat for Alton towers

[Anchovies12]

So we booked a couple of days at alton towers with our 3dcs and the first ride I tried to go on (galactica) the overhead restraint wouldn't lock into place and to my absolute horror I had to leave the ride in front of everyone.

Clearly got no one to blame other than myself but a combination of teaching full time, taking venlafaxine for depression and attempting to "stop dieting" has meant a horrendous diet, zero exercise and a weight gain of about 5 stone.

What do I do? I don't want to diet as I am convinced that the diet/binge cycle is not good for me - the minute I feel deprived in any way I feel sorry for myself and can only think about the scales and eating. Yet there is no way I can exercise enough to compensate for what i eat.

Am sat here on my own in alton towers feeling pretty hideous. Haven't let on to my dh/dcs how bad I feel, have just waved them onto every ride while inside I am dying of shame

They MyFitnessPal forums are very good - lifestyle over diet.

Let this be your 'moment'. Change starts now.

Could you try something like Slimming World or WeightWatchers? The plans mean you don't have to deprive yourself of anything with the syns/points systems, but everything in moderation. I wouldn't say they are "diets" either, more of a healthy lifestyle change.

You feel sorry for yourself when you deprive yourself of shit food? Without sounding harsh, you should feel sorry for your body and the shit you feed it - feed it healthy, nutritious foods, eat slightly less than your bmr requires and you will lose weight without feeling ‘deprived’

In your place I would diet if it has been effective for you in the past to restore a normal weight and then focus on maintaining the healthy weight.

Yy to PP about lifestyle over diet.

Could you start by making small changes e.g. No sugar in tea/coffee and increase other smaller changes along the way?

Please don't feel down OP, the important thing is you are recognising the need to change, that's the hardest part

Can you change your AD? Venlafaxine is terrible for weight gain, you'll put on weight even if you starve and exercise. It changes how you metabolize food and makes hungry.

‘Without sounding harsh’ and then being a dick. Nice.

OP, see this as the start. Your catalyst for action. There’s load of support on here and at meetings so you can begin a healthier lifestyle. You can definitely do this and you can do it being kind to yourself, not berating yourself for the past.

Without knowing what you eat it is difficult to give advice. Could you say what you eat on a typical day? Do you eat when you aren't hungry?

In the kindest way possible, you have to have self discipline. It'sts no good saying you don't want to diet - if you want to lose weight, there's no other way. Exercise won't cut it, it's got to be dieting. You need motivation. Join Slimming World. You'll get encouragement, kindness, recipes and suggestions that really work. You can eat nice food in large quantities and lose weight slowly but surely. Go tomorrow. (I lost 4 stone myself).

Tulip don't be a dick.

You feel sorry for yourself when you deprive yourself of shit food? Without sounding harsh, you should feel sorry for your body and the shit you feed it - feed it healthy, nutritious foods, eat slightly less than your bmr requires and you will lose weight without feeling ‘deprived’

And the award for least helpful post on MN ever goes to.......

Agree with itlhallhappens..those diets let you eat what you like but you certainly learn about nutrition and hopefully make good decisions for life. I would suggest bring packed lunch to theme parks a

and kind thoughts for you, OP. As a fat-assed chair breaker myself, I know these moments are the pits. The moment will pass and then you can think about how to tackle what needs to be tackled.

Helpful reply from Tulips there...

If it’s a psychological problem, could CBT be used to try to address it? There may be something online you could do, or the NHS does recommend some books. It probably feels like a lot of weight to lose but even after dropping half a stone you would feel a big difference.

Exercise won't cut it

But it bloody well helps!

Trying achieve long term weight loss requires both a sensible diet and exercise.

I was going to reply to the "without being harsh" post by being defensive but to be honest I can't defend what I currently eat. There's virtually nothing processed but generally too much of everything, lots of veg but also lots of carbs and fat too.

Thanks for the venlafaxine info, it has spurred me into making an appointment with the psychiatrist. I've tried to come off it before with only the gp's advice and it was a disaster.

Thanks to the posters who have given advice and ideas - you're all right - I need to look at this as a start of something not focus on how terrible I feel right now (as hard as that is!)

What do you do? You change this:

has meant a horrendous diet, zero exercise.

Do it gradually, there is a wealth of advice on MN and the rest of the internet I am sure you can find a plan/system that suits you.

Also may be worth speaking to your GP about this:

I don't want to diet as I am convinced that the diet/binge cycle is not good for me - the minute I feel deprived in any way I feel sorry for myself and can only think about the scales and eating.

as this perception/attitude will negatively effect anything you try, you will be setting yourself up for failure and when you do fail you will feel vindicated.

you don't need a Psychiatrist, you need to eat less and move more.

Also, I cannot recommend a diet called Lipotrim enough.

I did it for 3 months after I had my children and lost just over 5 stone.

You don’t need to feel deprived of food if you carefully examine what types of food you are eating

Your body size tells me you are probably carb intolerant/ insulin resistant and have been over doing the carbs for years

The only way to solve this is restrict your carbohydrate intake and get your body to fuel itself on FAT (via ketones)

You will feel full, energised and lose your weight but if you continue with your high carbohydrate diet you will continue to put on weight, and eventually develop some symptoms of metabolic syndrome e.g. diabetes t2

Read the forums here of what people your size are doing with this way of eating.

It’s not just about weight loss....it changes your life in many ways - for the energy and mental clarity you will gain. A lot of people cannot tolerate high carbohydrate, you are clearly one of them

Being fat is hard.
Losing weight is hard.
Maintaining is hard. But it gets easier.

So it's hard whatever you choose, but two of the options will let you ride the rollercoaster with the kids.

From reading your OP I'd start with working on your relationship with food. It sounds like you think about it a lot (been there) and that's a hard habit to break.
Would you be open to counselling?

I'm on a high dose of venlafaxine and have been for about 5 years. In that time I've (very slowly) lost 4.5 stone with Slimming World, put 3 stone back on, then lost it again with Exante (a VLCD).

I would recommend Slimming World, as you sound like you are a bit fed up with your eating habits anyhow, so starting a supportive healthy eating plan should fit in well. Forget about the medication - if you need it to keep you well then it is worth it. It's unlikely to be much of a factor in your weight gain.

Telling yourself that you are 'going on a diet' and will be depriving yourself is a sabotaging tactic. Instead try to say to yourself that you are now going to look after yourself really well, by eating a healthy balanced diet, and meeting some nice people at the SW group. It's not necessarily going to be easy, and be prepared for other group members to seem to lose weight more easily, but it is worth it in the end.

you don't need a Psychiatrist, you need to eat less and move more.

I'd be wary of telling people with diagnosed depression to stop seeing Drs and do a milkshake based diet instead.

I have sympathy op - I am also on meds that make you put on weight/make it difficult to lose it.

It's lifestyle changes as pp have said - walking rather than getting the bus/car/train (or getting off a few stops early), trying to incorporate activity into daily life. That can change your appetite/need for food. You'll feel better about yourself if you're fitter/more active. I can recommend swimming, even just walking on a treadmill for half an hour when you first start to start to feel better.

In terms of foods, there are a number of things you can try:
If portion sizes are a problem, buy smaller plates. We bought "salad" size plates and use them instead of dinner plates.
Only cook enough for "normal" portions for everyone (so there are no leftovers to finish)
If you're prone to snacking, can you not get in biscuits/crisps (or only get the ones you don't like!) and snack on nuts or similar - they still have calories but also more nutrients than junk food.

I understand what it's like to be an emotional eater so please go easy on yourself.

How the fuck can you say the OP doesn’t need a psychiatrist of course she does if she is under one and needs to question her meds. What sort of advice is that myheartbelongsto ?

Also, you can’t view a diet as something that has a start and a finish date at which point you revert back to your previous eating habits. It is an ongoing and long term lifestyle change. It does not mean having to eat boring and bland food forever or indeed going on some hard to adhere to spartan fad diet. Instead, through some basic changes consistent weight loss can be achieved. Aim to reduce your calorie intake by 15%, you will be surprised how easy that is to remove from your day to day eating.