Daughter in the neighbour's carpark

[iancoady]

We moved into a great cul-de-sac around 5 years ago, and most of our elderly neighbours are brilliant. Our 7 year old daughter makes cards for our 3 closest neighbours and has recently started 'popping round' for a chat, a drink and a biscuit.

On the opposite side of the road is a woman who can only be described as a busy body. I once turned my car around in her drive and there she was banging on the window and gesturing at me. It did no harm whatsoever but I've respected her (somewhat petty) wishes and not turned the car around there since.

Recently though, my daughter has started playing out the front of the house (so her other friends in the road can see her when they get home from school) but due to the large volumes of traffic in the road we have asked her to play in the two communal car parks in the road.

These are two large open spaces where residents know what their space is but they are not marked out in any way. As most residents also have garages AND drives these are rarely used, so provide a great off-road play area that is reasonably large.

Yesterday my daughter came in in tears as she had been playing 'schools' in the car park (she says she was pretending to teach Spanish and wasn't any louder than talking) when the woman started banging on her window and gesturing for her to get out of the car park. The poor thing was crying because she didn't even know what she had done.

My first reaction was to knock on her door and have a go at her but I try not to act impulsively as we all still have to live in the same street at the end of the day.

My first question is am I unreasonable to let my daughter play in the street providing she is not noisy (and she really isn't)?

Secondly, if the car park is a communal area, should she be allowed to play in there?

Finally, as I'm not even sure if this woman has a space in the communal car park (given she also has a drive and a garage) how can I find out if she does without checking the deeds to her house?

Any help you can give is appreciated, as I've already decided I need to talk to this woman and tell her that she isn't to interact with my daughter again. If she has an issue then she knows where I or my wife are and she can talk directly to us. Just not sure what to do about the rest.

The OP's daughter was playing schools I think. Not sure how that damages cars in a rarely used car park.

My neighbour lets her 7YO 'play out' all the time. It basically means that he comes round here, wanting to come into our house every bloody day. It's a total PITA

Playing outside isn't an issue and the car park sounds safe.

Reversing in someone else's drive is rude and would annoy a lot of people.

I'd tell your DD to come and tell you straight away if the lady bothers her again and then go and calmly ask her what the issue is.

I would also go and check with each of the neighbours she pops in to visit that they aren't being bothered by her. They may love seeing her, but they may equally find it annoying. Give them an easy out by saying that you're going to tell your DD not to 'pop round' unless she is invited to (without her prompting it) as you were worried she might be bothering them.

No sparkling, not at that time she wouldn't have been but perhaps she has previously been playing a ball etc. I've made it clear to the kids round here I don't want them anywhere near my car. Ball or otherwise. They are absolute shits round here tho.

Yes, but the OP hasn't said anything about a ball so I can't assume. Plus she says the car park is rarely used not packed to the brim with cars as yours is.

I do understand what you are saying Raskova it's just that the OP doesn't read like that IYKWIM.

No I don't think it reads like that either but the op does make it sound like she's as miserable as I am so perhaps she just gets pissed off for pissed offs sake

Car parks are not for playing in . Why does she have to stand where her friends can "see" her when they come home?
Surely they can call round...

Car parks are not for playing in

Well used car parks aren't great places to play. However two large open spaces that are rarely used for parking cars sound perfect for playing and far more appropriate than the road or driveways where cars will be parked and moving round.

It's much better for children to learn to play outside choosing appropriate spaces and playing in ways that don't irritate reasonable people or risk damaging property than it is for them to be kept on a short leash until they become teenagers and have freedom they don't know how to use.