The Inclusive Academy of Sword Fighting Skills for the Vertically Challenged, Milton North Campus

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Selected master classes available in;

Beard Plaiting
Grimacing
Application of Prosthetics
Dragon Taming

Please make welcome our <a class="break-all" href="http://www.google.co.uk/imgres?imgurl=www.ramascreen.com/wp-content/uploads/The-Hobbit-thorin-richardarmitage.jpg&imgrefurl=www.ramascreen.com/the-hobbit-first-look-at-thorin-oakenshield&usg=__O91GQN2kC1_7KRh88mB40XHMmYw=&h=1600&w=2400&sz=1063&hl=en&start=0&zoom=1&tbnid=KHapa_DPfVYNhM:&tbnh=137&tbnw=174&ei=2UkkTraJC4a38gPS2PGkAw&prev=/search%3Fq%3Dthorin%2Bpictures%26hl%3Den%26sa%3DX%26biw%3D1920%26bih%3D880%26tbm%3Disch%26prmd%3Divns&itbs=1&iact=hc&vpx=1270&vpy=422&dur=1623&hovh=183&hovw=275&tx=143&ty=96&page=1&ndsp=54&ved=1t:429,r:41,s:0&biw=1920&bih=880" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">new lecturer.

Do the LittleDamerels know any first aid? Do they know what to do if Mama faints dead away in the street?

Now if he'd told you to say ''look back at me'' Maud, things might have been very different.

Night night, Spiro.

Lady D, brilliant plan! The account of the Miserable Meal was given before your time. I will PM you rather than inflict it on everyone else again, okay?

They know how to stab me with an Epipen . I may have to give them a crash course in the vital differences between a nut reaction and a nutty reaction

Yes please. I may feel slightly less of a fool (unlikely but where there's life there's hope) if I know it's not just me.

Yes, Massive, although that still leaves the problem that I would have had to clamber over several seats (and their occupants) to get close enough to say "look back at me" or anything else. Besides, he was looking in my direction anyway, as I reported at tedious length at the time.

I suppose there was that, Maud. Plus the fact that you are far too polite to make a cake of yourself in such an unBritish manner. As are we all, naturally.

Where did you see him, Maud? Or is that classified information?

I simply feel, Massive, that I have long since filled my lifetime quota of making a cake of myself incidents so must now leave well alone. Plus I do have a deep sympathy for anyone who daily has to find a dozen different ways of responding politely to protestations of undying love/fandom/appreciation.

We had dinner together at The Ivy, LadyDamerel.

Now I'll PM you the truth.

. Naturellement, dahling. We've all done that. So passe and a trifle dull.

Passe and dull? Passe and dull? Classic and timeless, I think you'll find, my dear.

I always prefer Micky D's, myself, when I am in Town. So fun and ironic, doncha know.

Of course, I am judging by the standards of the Metropolis, not of the ::sniffs:: provinces whence Jasper has sequestered you. How is the old boy, by the way?

::snort:: at Massive and Mickey D's fun and irony.

Well I guess it's time I headed up the wooden hill.

Goodnight, ladies and sleep tight.

That was a very unladylike noise you emitted there, Maud. I collect you are not a purveyor of the quality gourmet available in MickeyD's?

Dear Jasper is very well, he sends his regards but would like to illustrate the correct tying of a cravat. He feels MrT's is a little stark.

Alas, the only comestible purveyed by Mickey Ds which I enjoy is the French fry. My dear husband opines that the victuals purveyed by The Monarch of the Burger are to be preferred.

I am glad to hear that Jasper is well, although his cravat appears somewhat louche to me. My dear Mr Thornton's daytime cravat is, naturally, neat, tidy and in all ways comme il faut but he does like to go a little wild in the evening.

I think I prefer MrT a little more at ease or hard at work.

The Monarch of the Burger would also be LordD's eating establishment of choice were he looking for a speedy service.

Have it your way eh? Saucy!

Wild Mr Thornton. Now there is a thought to retire on.

Nighty night all. once again.

Oh, LadyDamerel! The sight of Mr Thornton in a state of undress has quite disconcerted me.

Phwaorgh . He has a lovely neck, Maud. Tis a pity to cover it up with so much unnecessary fabric.

It is a dictum of the Academy, LadyDamerel, that part of the pleasure of a gift is the unwrapping of it.

And never a truer word was spoken, Maud.

I would particularly like to unwrap this gift.

I suppose you could find a loose thread on the woolly jumper and slowly unravel it or just rip it to shreads.

I don't think I'd have the patience to unravel it

::instant gratification girl::

::appreciates that the best things allegedly come to those who wait but does not feel that is applicable in these circumstances::