A new term at the Faculty of Armitage Studies, University of Milton North

[LaVieEnTechnicolor]

Do come in. It's never too late to enrol. We have an extensive programme of rigorous academic study and a never-ending supply of Chateau Gizzy and ratafia biscuits.

::Sets out enticing buffet on the common room sideboard::

::Warms the tea pot, steeps the leaves, arranges ratafia biscuits on a Spode plate and gets ready to welcome distinguished guests::

Dear Jonny....

Is there still a cup in the pot for me, then? I guess it's gone cold by now.Good afternoon, ladies. And gentleman.

Did you see who the Q & A id with on mumsnet Latest?

Gizzi...ROFL

We don't want this one to feel left out, either. He's looking a bit indignant.

Wrong Gizzi, ROFLMAO. No wonder Guy looks p**d off!

Oh, very elfin, that first one Theresa. Elfin sounds so much nicer than gnomic, don't you think? As for the second, he doesn't look as if a mere cup of tea would quell his indignant wrath!

How do you think we could placte him, then, Techno? I don't think a ratafia would cut the mustard, either...

placate, obviously. I thought Lucas looked a bit like Harry, there.

You could offer him an apple, Theresa. We know he likes apples.

::Gets Nell Gwynn costume out of the academy armoire::

I had to chuckle at Rob Kazinsky on Twitter yesterday moaning about the horse riding element of their Hobbit training.

I bet at least one of his co-stars isn't having the same problems

Save the apple for Richie. I have a better plan.

Shut up, Teri, for goodness saks.

You confused me there for a moment, Theresa. I thought you meant Harry Pearce! By the way, did you notice in one of yesterday's research documents, where Lucas/John Bateman and Harry were sitting head to head, you could see what big feet grandma really has.

We know what you mean, MrsLN

Hmm. I knew Teri would have plans that were less vegetable and more carnal.

I thought of that too when I read that tweet, MrsLN. Thorin Oakenshield sits his horse like a prince.

Teri is incorriglble. I would never have thought of that myself. Whatever it was she was thinking of, she adds hastily.

I overlooked the big feet, Must have been looking somewhere else.

My friends Dh said to me last night 'Surely you won't fancy him when he's dressed up as a dwarf?'

I told him that having fancied him in 'Benny from Crossroads' mode in Sparkhouse I really couldn't rule out the possibility of fancying Oakenshield.

TBH I have already resigned myself to that one

While on the subject of riding, I just had a thought about the horses. Are there special dwarf ones that they ride? If not, they are going to have difficulties with the size ratio. Has anyone seen what they did about the problemm in LOTR?

Teri's been very quiet recently. Is she well? Or is she kept locked in the attic like the unfortunate first Mrs Rochester?

Isn't the point about the horses that they have full size actors riding full size horses and then digitally tweak them to dwarf proportions?

::Yearns for a nice Merchant Ivory film with sprigged muslin, heaving bosoms and no CGI::

I haver been a bit worried about Teri, actually, I think she has nefarious plans to lock me in the cupboard and take my place. I came on here once to find her rambling on about clumpy boots and spurs, of all things...

I was just wondering how they managed when dwarf and non dwarf horse and rider combos were in the same shot.
Okay, I know. the trench.

I thought that's how they did the heaving bosoms. With CGI.

Hmm, yes, further complications. But again I assume it's all done with wizardry of the technical sort. Still, it seems to me we need less of this and more of this.

I suppose we shall just have to wait. But they will have a job to make him anything other than tres charmant

Obviously, there can be no sequel to N&S, it is complete and perfect as it is, but what would be your ideal costume drama part for him, other than dear Johnny?

I think it's time to bring back.