I'm a hoarder - AMA

30 replies

Unorganisedchaos2 · 16/05/2025 16:23

Just that, I know its been covered a lot lately on telly with Stacey Solomon etc but ask away if there someone thing you always wanted to know.

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Unorganisedchaos2 · 16/05/2025 18:13

SummerInSun · 16/05/2025 17:40

Was money tight when you were growing up? My DH is bad at throwing things away and I think it tracks back to this. Eg we will agree we need new towels, we will buy new towels, I will keep a couple of old ones for those sort of situations where you need old towel eg a leak, but then when I want to throw the others away, he wants to keep them “just in case”, and I think the “just in case” is that subconsciously he is worried a day may come when we need additional towels but can’t afford to buy them.

Very interesting to hear you say you feel awful when the stuff leaves the house. I think most people - certainly me! - absolutely love the feeling of chucking big bags of stuff at the charity shop and in the bin. It makes me feel great, not dreadful.

Yes they were and looking back it was probably badly managed when they had it.
I had very poor money management skills and lots of debt so I wonder if the guilt from running up debt to buy things makes me less likely to throw things away as there were times I hadn't even finished paying for stuff.

Interesting though I have a sister very close in age who doesn't hoard at all and loves clearing out?

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Unorganisedchaos2 · 16/05/2025 18:14

MounjaroMounjaro · 16/05/2025 17:45

Dilly Carter, from Sort Your Life Out, has a business where they go in and sort things out for hoarders, much as they do on the show. She grew up with a mentally ill mum who hoarded and she really understands it. I think she's amazing.

Gosh really, I missed this.

I might look into it and its reassuring to know Im not the only one - if she has a business doing it there must be plenty of us?!

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FlowerUser · 16/05/2025 18:31

I understand about the pain of getting rid of things. I probably have ADHD and Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria.

I’m not really a hoarder now that everything has its place, but I do have drawers with stuff in that feels too good to be thrown away. For example I had a Boots beauty advent calendar that included things like nail polish. I don’t use it but I can’t bear to throw it away because it was new and shiny and unused. Throwing it away felt criminal.

DH now has a system where something I can’t bear to part with is put away out of my sight until I almost forget about it and then he says he will take it to the Kitten Cloud. There the items will be looked after in a beautiful restful place by the cute kittens.

I think they go in the recycling or the bin, but it feels emotionally better.

AndrogynousElf · 16/05/2025 20:13

Unorganisedchaos2 · 16/05/2025 17:19

Part of me would love too and she seems really too but the shame would be too much. I've found since really trying to tackle the hoards that if I clear a space I can maintain it so it would probably be life changing.

I've found watching her show really helpful and it spurs me on to clear a cupboard or drawer. I think it does highlight that even when a house is still functioning and not got to how people typically imagine a hoarder house to look it still really isn't right and people deserve to live better.

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Yeah it’s interesting how much of a difference it makes to people’s lives. Especially when they can now start inviting friends over. Or just don’t get stressed looking for things all the time.

Next question is actually what I’d want to ask someone on Sort Your Life Out. Do you ever think about how much money all this stuff has cost over the years? Or how many natural resources have been used in manufacturing? I’m not a hoarder but even I think about this a lot.

mepipesneedlagging · 16/05/2025 22:49

Agree with a PP about how good it feels to offload something.
I have noticed that I get the urge (and that's exactly how strong the feeling is) when I am feeling stressed or anxious or upset..

I comb my house from top to bottom in search of stuff to donate.
My attic is one of my favourite places, it has so much declutter potential and I feel thrilled. It's so weird 🤔
I also have to have everything completely ordered and labelled and living in it's own place.
The complete opposite of my childhood home.
My childhood was neglectful and abusive 😞

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