I'm just an average gypsy AMA

[GypsyAMA]

I've noticed a lot of hatred towards gypsies on here so I thought I'd answer any questions anyone may have that could help you to understand my culture more. You might still disagree with many aspects, but at least you'll be coming from facts and not stereotypes.

I just can't get over the poor treatment of animals. Obviously it won't be every traveller or gypsy person that mistreats animals but it seems very common. Abandoned dogs that have been bred to within an inch of their lives and horses whipped and chained to the side of the road with no water. There are zero excuses, cultural or otherwise. Is there just less value placed on animals in the gypsy community I wonder ? The upper classes seem to have a similar problem to fair, racing horses to their death etc

Op you said you'd be curious why people go to university. I did because I love learning about new things. Not to earn money, but to learn for learning's sake. It's curiosity. how do things work. physics, astronomy, science in general. And that curiosity did in the end give me a profession. I could apply my learning to the field of finance. But that wasn't the impetus, curiosity about something much bigger than me, my immediate surroundings, society and time.. I had no idea what profession I'd have. If your children are curious too, would you tell them to be practical and choose a trade or would going to uni for this be ok?

When I saw I thought "that's brilliant" and just after "oh dear god what are we going to read". I think you're very brave and it was a brilliant move. That's exactly how you fight ignorance and racism, you've made the right decision and I've learnt lots. Where I'm from (south of France) there were several families in caravans staying a few days/weeks in the parks where they could fit, but I could see that little by little the town was closing them off (adding huge rocks along the edge, etc). I went back some time ago and I saw that they had created a specific area for travellers, which is being used very often. I think that's a great idea, it's near a big supermarket, they seem to have good facilities, and it looks like an arrangement that benefits everyone. I cannot understand why you would throw out a whole community repeatedly and not try and accomodate their needs. If they go through your town, it's their way of life, surely you can spare a bit of land to allow them to stop.

Definitely an outcast 😂
I kept myself to myself really. I had a couple of friends there but didn’t advertise I was a gypsy but also didn’t hide it. My cousins went to the same school so we mostly stuck together

Apologies if I am saying anything offensive. If so please correct me so I can learn.

I was under the impression that it was travellers rather than Roma gypsies who leave the mess and mistreat their animals.

When I was a teen our family came to know an extended family of Roma gypsies. They were all settled in houses although there were two brothers who lived in a caravan on their own plot of land. The family, and especially the two brothers, were highly respected locally as dog and horse trainers and would be first port of call for many farmers locally before they called the vet. The whole family had huge respect for the environment. My understanding was that caring for the land around them was important to the Roma whereas the Travellers didn't care. Is that accurate or am I stereotyping?

An excellent thread OP with very informative & interesting answers to questions.

With respect my question is regarding the belief gypsies are more likely to be psychic & they place importance on tarot card readings, glass globes etc. Is this prevalent in your culture & is this actually a true assumption. Thank you.

There are many Roma people settled where I live. My main question is...

Why do they all wear wedge heeled sandals?! Is it a style of footwear that's similar to a traditional Roma footwear?

Thanks!

@GypsyAMA

Another education question, sorry, but to put it in context so it hopefully doesn't come across as too judgemental, I'm currently considering the pros and cons of home education and one of the things I'm weighing up is the interest the local authority might want to take in what we're doing - I'd been reading about how local authorities may approach satisfying themselves that children are in appropriate full-time education...

What kind of scrutiny do you and your children get about home education - how do you manage that? I'd read about local authorities being able to use legal powers to enforce school enrollment if they aren't satisfied a child is receiving what they consider to be an adequate education - is that something that you've had to challenge?

No, most of the men I know just learnt the trade from their dads, uncles, cousins. I guess the point of an nvq is to learn a trade but we just learn from each other so no need? Most men I know are self employed so employers aren’t looking for qualifications.
I guess it’s just not the education that you’re thinking of but there’s a whole world to learn that’s not in a book or taught in schools. Maybe just a different perspective and different education from
the norm?

It's a way of earning money that's all.

Much like any other 'psychic' or 'tarot reader'.

Is fighting a primary means of conflict resolution or a last resort?

how do you think the fighting culture plays into the negative stereotypes of your community? I had not heard of fighting as a means of conflict resolution, but you do hear tales of aggressive responses to seemingly benign interactions. Your post makes me wonder if this is simply a mismatch in what is considered the appropriate way to speak and the appropriate body language during these interactions.

Ok that makes sense, thanks for answering?

does any sort of education happen at home? Is there not potential consequences from the local authorities? (Not trying to be goady, genuine question as I don’t know)

what about the expectations being different that OP mentioned? How might that be different?

No - that just reinforces my point actually. Anyone can travel round in a caravan with a ladder on the roof and thieve things - that doesn’t mean they’re either Irish Travellers or Romany Gypsies - the council (and you) are associating a behaviour with an ethnic group, there’s loads of people who behave this way who belong to neither.

And I know you feel like you have answered the schooling question, but you really haven’t. You ignored my question about escaping abuse. It was not an accusation towards your community. It is the same exact question I ask every woman planning to have children without marketable skills. How will you support your children if the father has a personality transplant?

money and education don’t protect women from abuse, but they make it much easier to escape. If you can earn enough to pay for childcare and still run a household, then you can always get out.

a side-hustle the equivalent of selling on Etsy rarely is enough to support a family.

I'm confused now.

Are you the OP under a different name?

Or just answering questions put to her?

Earlier this week, there was a thread where a poster said that if anyone tapped her on the shoulder to get her attention, she would punch them in the face.

When challenged, the woman said that she was gypsy, and that this was part of her culture.

I would like to know, are you that poster? And if you are not, do you agree that punching someone in the face is a normal/appropriate way to react to someone trying to get your attention by tapping you on the shoulder? If so, please can you explain why that is part of gypsy culture?

*potato57 · Today 19:03
JuvenileBigfoot · Today 18:57

I'd just like to remind everyone that's posting about "leaving rubbish in parks" about the utter state of places like Clapham Common and Primrose Hill on the first sunny day after lockdown a couple of years ago.

and the mess left after festivals. After concerts. In the cinema. At football stadiums. Utterly disgusting and nothing to to with Gypsies.

Dirty disrespectful people exist in all walks of life, including middle class suburbia.
I don't agree with it, but they don't do it 24/7 and they don't trespass, and if nothing else at least they pay council tax to contribute to the clean up, or they're in places where cleaners and hired to clean. I agree this country is disgusting though, it's third world when it comes to litter and filth.*

I live in a small town in central Europe that is currently an extremely popular holiday destination for people of all ages, from all over the world. Young British people (very much secondary school educated, typically aged 18-30 and definitely not gypsies or travellers, just the typical children of many mumsnetters) massively stand out for how they behave - loud drunken, wandering about in swimwear, and, most of all, vomiting everywhere leaving unbelievable amounts of rubbish behind them. No attempt whatsoever to put so much as an empty water bottle in the bin. I run self catering apartments, and it is very noticeable that young people from other nationalities are not like this. Just saying.

My father in laws birth certificate states that his father was a travelling showman - would you think that means he was part of a circus or a traveller? We've often wondered and no means of finding out

Thanks for asking this, it is the same where I am, it intrigues me a lot, all age groups of women wear wedge shoes and usually with socks. At my time in life I wouldn't be able to balance on them, I would tip over and probably break my ankles

@Kacijade
No, most of the men I know just learnt the trade from their dads, uncles, cousins. I guess the point of an nvq is to learn a trade but we just learn from each other so no need? Most men I know are self employed so employers aren’t looking for qualifications.
I guess it’s just not the education that you’re thinking of but there’s a whole world to learn that’s not in a book or taught in schools. Maybe just a different perspective and different education from* the norm?*

Thats ok for the males but, as I mentioned in my earlier post, it leaves the women in an extremely vulnerable situation. Women in GRT communities are almost three times as likely to be lone parents than in the general population so that combined with the fact they are much, much more likely not to work leaves them up shit creek.
It might be nice being a home maker when you have a man to provide for you but if he buggers off how does that work. I suspect the fact more men in the GRT community are self employed means that single parent mothers are less likely to receive child support.

Maybe, just maybe there is some argument that the boys can benefit from helping their Dads out when they are teens but you can't convince me that female teens are better off at home when they could be at school. It's not difficult learning how to cook and clean.

I'm struggling to find any way how anyone can justify it. It seems like it's only going to continue to cause more hardship to females in the GRT community.

Hi sorry for the confusion. I am a gypsy who commented and someone asked me a question so just answering back

You mentioned in the beginning of the thread somewhere about being followed around in shops and having to pay first in restaurants etc, but you also mentioned about being normal and unnoticeable. So how do people distinguish if you are gypsy or not to end up following you around? (due to the bad stereotype)

Why are there so many antagonistic questions? And daft ones?

Do Roma people swim? - I mean. 😆

Someone mentioned The Boswells from Bread earlier - I would say no, they weren’t meant to be gypsies. I am related to the Boswell Romani on my husband’s side. His grandparents were the first to settle in a house but kept their old wagon out in their garden and would sit in it most of the day. They were the last ‘gypsies’ of the line.
My son has done a huge ancestry trail and it’s fascinating. Sone of the first names we discovered are very different like Comfort.

I know some Romani who have settled nearby. They live in more chalets than vans and are a small community. They have lived there for decades and were fairground folk. They live peacefully and there has certainly been no problems with them.

The travelling community can be very different and you shouldn’t lump everyone in together!

Thank you for answering but it doesn't really cover my question to the OP which was how prevalent is it in the culture & how much do they rely on it.

Why are the children encouraged more to box/fight (boys) and clean (girls) rather than get an education and a half decent job?