I'm just an average gypsy AMA

[GypsyAMA]

I've noticed a lot of hatred towards gypsies on here so I thought I'd answer any questions anyone may have that could help you to understand my culture more. You might still disagree with many aspects, but at least you'll be coming from facts and not stereotypes.

I honestly don’t know that many single parents. I don’t mean to sound judgemental but my family is very close and we really rely on each other. Gorjas I know tend to stick with their nuclear family but barely see their nan or cousins. So even the single parents aren’t alone by the same standards.
i also know women who have successfully opened their own businesses in cleaning and catering. I went to school til 16. I would allow my children to make a choice on their education based on how they are. I strongly disagree that only going to school and uni will make you financially independent. I know gorjas that did the stereotypical education and are unemployed. I just don’t think there’s only one way to do things.

How do you differ from Irish travellers?

Please make your own AMA! :)
I just leaned of separate showmen subculture and I am fascinated! :)

@GypsyAMA i work in a local council and the prejudice I see levelled at gypsies (and travellers and showmen) is awful. It appears to be the final area where people feel comfortable being outwardly disparaging to whole communities.

but it’s not even in my professional work that I see it. The use of the horrible ‘p’ word seems to fall of people’s tongues who would otherwise say they aren’t racist.

i was lucky enough to mentor a young girl from the gypsy community and she has absolutely flown in her career although so many were against her. Sadly she changed her name to break connections.

my question is, what can be done to break down these prejudices? Do you think they ever could be?

😂 I'm old, ethnically uninteresting and all my shoes are wedges! I feel more secure with whole-foot ground contact, and need some heel elevation due to pain. <end of shoe diversion>

Thanks for a fascinating thread, OP! I’ve really enjoyed reading and learnt a lot. It’s sad how prejudice society is.

My questions are:

Are there things you would allow your DC to do which you weren’t allowed to do yourself? (You mentioned school trips, for example).

Also, if you would have had a career, what do you think it would have been?

Thanks for this post ! I have so many questions and apologies in advance for sounding clueless or ignorant.

1. Are Roma/ Gypsies/ Travellers all the same or just different ethnicities .ie. Irish, Romanian etc?
2. What are the men REALLY like? I read about the "grabbing" culture for the unmarried youngsters and that apparently, there is a high rate of women suffering with abusive husbands within the Gypsy communities. No offence, but the men I've seen speaking in the documentaries usually come across as controlling and over- macho. Do you think this is a fair representation?
3. OK, I feel embarrassed to ask this question , but I need an answer! I always associated Gypsies with those old school depictions of horses, beautiful hand painted wagons and mystical women that would go around reading peoples' fortunes and offering herbal cures (A life I wouldn't mind leading myself lol) So imagine my surprise when I was watching one of those Ch4 documentaries years ago and saw that the Travelling community in the UK/ Ireland all seem to be super Catholic and really showing up for the major Holy events. Whats going on lol? Or am I confusing Irish Travelling culture with Gypsy culture or Roma culture?...

Thank you for making this thread and being very open with your answers. You’re very articulate, which makes me very ashamed that I was surprised.

your thread has made me re-evaluate my prejudices.

Are you worried that technology/internet will erode your culture by presenting your children with different ways of life?

simple question for you. why is it that when travellers leave they always leave a load of fucking shit (literally) and crap behind for others to clear up? Is this some kind of badge of honour?

I am reading this thread which is very enlightening.

I just can't get over the education stance and pulling DC out early. Genuinely, I don't know another culture that has access to free education that would do that.

Who would choose to stay ignorant about facts on loads of different topics? (I am not even talking about sex ed - geography, art, maths, science?)
Who would choose to give their DC less options in life?

Please could you expand on that.

The average household income in the UK is £36k - do you think most gypsies earn above or lower than that amount?

I don't know if they still do, but the Amish used to. And of course in certain muslim countries, they go one better and just ban it.

Really interesting thread.

I live in Portugal, are the gypsies here the same community/follow the same way of life as you?

What to you do in the evenings? Do you watch TV, or is it more a social kind of thing? Also, toilets/bathrooms - do you have/use one in your home? I think you said you are in a static caravan. I thought most gypsies nd travellers didn't like to use the one in the caravan, but how does that work on a practical basis if that is the case, especially with kids?

Perhaps neither; all those I know were from my exH's family, and they ran funfairs

Naturally most of these are in the summer or at least better weather, so at these times they stay in large caravans, and in the winter months most had normal houses to return to

Travelling showman here. What do you need to know? There aren’t many last names in our culture, so if you share it, I may know the family line. He would’ve been working with carnivals, travelling between cities.

@godmum56

I meant living in the UK or a democracy.

Amish is a religion not a race like a gypsy.

Wow, do you have and idea how offensive and derogatory your comment is?
70yrs ago, the UK was saying the same about MY people (West Indian) when our parents and grandparents were attempting to build their lives here...

This is a great thread, thank you for it. I don’t know much about gypsies or much about the stereotypes surrounding gypsies. I just know there’s a general dislike of them from so many people. Why is that?

Even reading this thread to see you say that education isn’t really valued is really interesting. How come? So what do people do if they don’t finish school? I’ve only read a few comments so will hopefully educate myself by reading the whole thread

Can I ask what the difference is? Is it just two groups that are from different countries but their way of living is the same?

I am clearly missing something but why is schools starting to "teach about sex" at a certain stage a negative thing?

No question.
Just wanted to drop by and say I'm from the New Forest and my Dad had loads of Romany Gypsy friends and they looked out for him as did he for them. Only good vibes.
People are either nice or not and respecting our differences is not difficult.

I am finding this thread really interesting, thank you @GypsyAMA . I can't think of anything to ask you that hasn't already been asked, but you sound like a nice person. Thank you for sharing your life and your culture with us.

@DreamTheMoors My understanding of Big Fat Gypsy Wedding was that the people featured were Irish Travellers. The OP is Roma, who have a different approach.

OP, thanks for starting this and rising to the challenge of navigating the discussion with decorum and grace.

I have Roma heritage and confess to not knowing much about it but I do often draw on it to make points at work about the difference between race and ethnicity, diversity and inclusion, and call out colleagues for using slurs.

I work in health care and we struggle to reach into the Roma and Traveller communities to support them, so I'm really interested to know about how the community engages with health care generally. Not vaccinations and breastfeeding, more about seeking medical help and handling long term health conditions.

Is health talked about in families or more widely? If care is needed, is it handled within the family?

Would someone go to doctors for tests if they were concerned about something or not?

Are there any beliefs about illnesses that influence the approach? (Eg we hear a lot from South Asian communities that a diagnosis is karma or punishment)

Op- thank you for the thread. Imo you've answered with dignity and honesty. I'm shocked by continued attacks and comments re waste etc. we don't judge all brits by the often contemptible actions of chavvy louts, and nor by the often contemptible actions of the wealthy blue blooded- these are minority shitbags who we distance the general
Population from. I see no reason why people are so very eager to judge all gypsies by the worst of their communities. I personally refuse to be judged by the worst of British behaviour- because it's often awful.

My question is are you superstitious? And if so, are there specific superstitions to your community that wouldn't apply elsewhere? ( I ask because my grandmother was riddled with superstitions- not least of which that we had to buy from any gypsy that offered goods, not because she feared "curses" but rather she had a deep seated belief that they were "lucky" )

@Kacijade

I honestly don’t know that many single parents. I don’t mean to sound judgemental but my family is very close and we really rely on each other. Gorjas I know tend to stick with their nuclear family but barely see their nan or cousins. So even the single parents aren’t alone by the same standards.
i also know women who have successfully opened their own businesses in cleaning and catering. I went to school til 16. I would allow my children to make a choice on their education based on how they are. I strongly disagree that only going to school and uni will make you financially independent. I know gorjas that did the stereotypical education and are unemployed. I just don’t think there’s only one way to do things.

The statistics speak for themselves though. Have you looked at them. They are shocking. The outcomes for GRT community are really poor compared with the national population. They are more disadvantaged than any other minority group and the women are the even more disadvantaged than the men.
Literally no one has said that you need to go to university to be financially independent.

What do the GRT community see as the cultural value of pulling girls out of school early. How do they think it benefits the girls? You've commented that you will let your children choose themselves but that's a cop out. The chances of your kids choosing to stay at school must be very low when you clearly don't value education.

I'm also interested what it is that makes it so much more likely that a GRT couple will separate than a couple in the general population? It seems at odds with the idea that family is so important in the GRT community. What do you think?