I'm just an average gypsy AMA

[GypsyAMA]

I've noticed a lot of hatred towards gypsies on here so I thought I'd answer any questions anyone may have that could help you to understand my culture more. You might still disagree with many aspects, but at least you'll be coming from facts and not stereotypes.

My dad is a gypsy, but my mum isn’t and I never lived with him growing up. I was struck by how the girls left school so early, it leaves them with no (or at least very limited) options to get a job in later years and so their only economic choice is really to get married and have kids, which is the life my cousins are now stuck with. I don’t think it’s fair to say they could do it if they wanted to but at home, with all due respect you’re not a teacher and I can imagine it’s extremely hard to home school at that level without additional support. I understand that this is cultural but just as with other cultures I don’t think that makes it beyond reproach. Kids should be getting GCSEs at an absolute minimum

I've always wondered what happens if a couple experience fertility issues. It seems like family is such an important aspect of life for you, and many people are also Roman Catholic. What happens if a couple can't have children naturally? Is IVF allowed? Is there any stigma for couples who are childless, even if it's not their choice? Thanks this is a really interesting read!

Which is by design, of course.

The old adage of pregnant, barefoot and in the kitchen.

If vaccinations are verboten, I can't see IVF being allowed.

I completely agree. I’ve cut off contact with my family as I found it too depressing. I would go and see my grandparents and when my grandma had terminal cancer my grandad would bark at her to make him cups of tea because ‘that’s what women do’. I’d told them I wanted to be a lawyer at age 11 and all they would say was that I’d never be able to find a husband or keep a home. Was a very damaging environment for me

I have full access to DH money and don't need permission to spend

My husband didn't want me to work as he wanted to provide but if there was something I really wanted to do he would be supportive

Yes contraception is used, but not spoken about in front of men or children

My DC would be able to come out to me but they would certainly face being ostracised by a lot of people. I've never actually seen a gypsy same sex marriage

Personal choice after doing my own research

Romany gypsy is an ethnicity, same as British etc

If you all claim to be so clean why do you leave a massive vile mess every time you camp somewhere . We had gypsies camp in the school car park twice and both times they leave from human waste to food waste all over . Why can’t you respect others ?

I've visited about 20 countries, I love to travel.

I don't know/teach any foreign languages, I wasn't aware this was a thing beyond learning the basics when going on holiday

OP, you've just reminded me of an anecdote i read about a little girl who had just learned about the birds and the bees.

And her first response (to her mum) was 'oh my god. Does Dad know??'

Racist, prejudice. Yawn.

So many people have been able to ask productive and challenging questions and that's what you choose to write. Pathetic.

I’m not from the UK but sadly have very negative experiences too. From trying to steal absolutely everything in my father’s store, the men trying to occupy my dad while women with huge skirts just took stuff and getting abusive when confronted. Same thing year after year, when they came to our village. Scared the shit out of everyone.

What does your husband do for a living. I've seen you've said he's self-employed, but as what? I imagine he's on a decent income as the sole earner in the household, especially if you enjoy travelling.

Because it’s the one that bothers me the most . I went to school with gypsies we get along even now fine , but I cannot grasp while their homes are sparkly clean why the outside of the homes or campers is vile . It’s a fair question and far from racist …. In fact I think you mean xenophobic , which in fact it isn’t either

Hi OP and thanks for this interesting AMA.

You have acknowledged that some teens may have relationships in secret and their parents are unaware. Are you not concerned that the lack of sex education could result in unwanted pregnancies?

Also, can I ask what age Gypsy children are allowed smartphones and if they are allowed to access the internet?

Interesting that you say on the one hand that you're not identifiable as a gypsy, and on the other that you are asked to pay before eating etc. Which is it?

I also don’t like that the eldest son (unless disabled because he wouldn’t count) gets the most food, and gold and things and the youngest (girl) gets starved rather than denying the eldest. Here you can see who the eldest son is because he is the fattest. Madness, in my eyes.

You will be called racist as she is not replying to the questions we actually have similar to this 🤷🏻‍♀️

you would allow them to make their own decisions but you would pull then out of school? Do you think that is a contradiction there?

We have had horrible messes left in our village by some traveller camps. It's disgusting. But I would never assume all travellers, gypsies, romanies would behave in the same way because that would be racist!

I've also seen some ethnically British people leave a right mess...

Interesting thread, op is it harder now to keep the younger ones growing up as part of the gypsy community and way of life or do they all grow up knowing that this is the way and they don't look at other options of breaking away and living a completely different life?

Unfortunately having grown up next to Romany gypsies it’s not occasionally, it’s often . Even if hen they where given homes in the area I grew up the outsides where damaged and full of accumulated rubbish and fences where destroyed etc . Off course I assume there are exceptions but normally if there is an illegal camp set up they will leave a massive trail of mess and destruction . Both times the school had to close for days too as police couldn’t guarantee anyone’s safety .

I was taught by an older woman at uni, who had worked all her life close with gypsies, that is NOT racist to say certain things to or about them. Because they have to face modern life to and be challenged. So we should not be afraid to challenge certain aspects at all. It’s not ok to starve a child because she is the youngest and the eldest son should have everything before the rest. For example.

@GypsyAMA

I think Irish travellers still get married a lot younger as far as I know, maybe that's the confusion

It was definitely Roma gypsy - but the ones I speak of had recently come into the UK from Eastern Europe. It's probable that your culture, being settled and within the UK, is completely different.