I'm an Orthodox Jewish Woman, ask me anything.

[Jewishbookwork]

On the thread @Israelilefty started, people were asking about Orthodox Judaism. So I am starting (another) one here. Other Orthodox Jewish women are welcome to answer too, so we have more of a range of answers.

I am Chabad Chasidic, we are very religious - I wear a wig, my husband wears black and white and we have lots of books in hebrew in our house.

You now need to attend services and also do some volunteering to get in to a lot of United Synagogue affiliated schools.

I just want to add - I have a child at a modern orthodox primary school. While there are mostly Jews who attend, non-Jews are welcome to apply and also do get in despite it being an oversubscribed school. It doesn't matter what religion you belong to, or no religion at all, as long as you have attended the correct amount of synagogue services and done the required amount of volunteering ie collected your CRP. You can also get in just by living near enough the school (again, regardless of religion) but as it's so oversubscribed and there are so many siblings (who take priority) this is very rare.

Thanks it must have changed a lot since my DH's time, he is now 33!

Back in his day, there were no non Jews (not even people who weren't considered halakchically Jewish but otherwise identified as Jewish) and his school was very firmly MO. Though recently there was a girl at my synagogue who has a non Jewish mum but was very keen to do sixth form at DH's alma mater.

I have seen more than one post regarding Pesach and cleaning now, so I'm really intrigued. If I remember correctly then Pesach is a special day?
What is the cleaning for Pesach referring to?
And what is the significance of Pesach? Thank you

@jewishorthomum you mentioned it is forbidden to have physical contact with the opposite gender which is not immediate blood family (same in Islam too)
Have you ever been in a situation where a man puts his hand out to shake yours? And how to react to it without offending?

Yes I've had work meetings when men offer me a hand I'll say something like "For religious reasons I don't shake hands with opposite gender". I do my best to make it not personal. Sometimes it gets awkward, but most times men are very understanding.

The origin of Pesach (Passover) comes from the Torah/bible when the Jews were enslaved in Eygpt. Their redemption from Eygpt happened in the middle of the night and the Jews had to quickly make some bread for the journey out and they didn't have time to let it rise. The exodus from Eygpt took 7 days of open miracles culminating with the splitting of the Red Sea. This unleavened bread is called Matzah and on Passover, that's what we eat, instead of bread. Every year, for the week of Passover we do not have any risen bread/cracker inorder to commemorate these event. We must clean out our houses from any crumbs of bread in preparation for the 7 days of Passover. The law is that one shouldn't eat, own or benefit from risen bread.
Many homes take this time of the year to do an intense spring clean, but this really isn't needed for Passover.

There are many deeper spiritual thoughts behind the meaning of Passover, but the basic source is above.

There are non Jews who go to the trouble of attending synagogue and volunteering so their children can go to a Jewish school? (where they will be one of very few non Jews)?

My kids go to such a school but it is not oversubscribed by Jewish students so plenty of non Jews get in based on distance or other factors.

@jewishorthomum it's great to hear that most people have been understanding. My experience has been the same except one time I was at the hospital with my little one over the Christmas period and there was a man dressed as santa going around meeting all the children in the ward and out of the blue he gave me a big bear hug which I was not expecting at all! And in the moment I did not know what to do or how to react

Practically speaking a basic Pesach clean means removing all crumbs of food in the house that fall into the category of bread. Then a good cleaning of the floors, and a deep cleaning of the kitchen and anywhere else that food is eaten.

Maybe they are from interfaith marriages? 1 out of 3 Jewish people marry out.

I think the not hugging my son in law would be the hardest bit for me 😔.
When do you first cover your hair? Is it on the wedding day or the first day after?
Also do you know anyone that shaves their head? I always wonder if it's not do disappointing for their husband's!

@jewishorthomum thank you for the explanation regarding Pesach

Its so interesting how our religions align in so many ways.
I wasn't aware that Muslims have physical contact restrictions. For some reason I thought in Islam only affectionate touch was forbidden between genders.

@Parkingt111 this is a video that shows the steps in preparing the kitchen for passover.

@jewishorthomum yes it's for all physical touch except in times of need like medical care or anything to do with helping/saving a life. Although even then its preferred to have a female doctor or nurse if possible.

Yup! It's an academically highly regarded school, so lots of people want their kids to go there.

@literaryloveaffair the non-Jews at the school that I've met aren't from interfaith marriage. Both parents are non-Jewish but just really liked the school when they went to the open day, I guess! Actually, there is one who has a Jewish father and non-Jewish mother, but the rest of them are just not Jewish :)

This is pretty accurate😊

I first covered my hair on my wedding day. I wore a wig at my wedding. Some people have the custom to only cover their hair once the wedding night is over, so they'll cover the day after.
Many of my students are from the Chassidic community and they shave their hair. From listening to them chatting between themselves, I understand that some girls are totally fine with shaving, their mum did it, their grandma did it and its just part of life. And then some girls are more nervous and unsure about it. I'm not sure how this plays out and whether they feel they have a choice, it most probably varies between families.
I know that in Chassidic circles the hair covering/shaving situation is talked about before marriage to make sure the couple is on the same page so there are no surprises. I also know that there are many girls who start out shaving and then after a bit of time let their grow, and I've heard of vice versa too.

@jewishorthomum that's interesting about passover I just remembered we fast on the day we believe the prophet Moses peace be upon him escaped from pharaoh. There's other reasons too for why that day is significant and the fasting is not mandatory but holds great virtue if one does.

Slightly different to @jewishorthomum i didn’t cover my hair at my wedding (other than a thin veil) and only started covering the following morning.

the chasidshe people I know don’t shave. It’s not a universal custom with chasidim

The ones who do shave, do they still cover their head at home? I read that there is kabbalistic reasoning behind the shaving, but couldn't find anything on this. Any insight?

Some people cover their hair following the chuppa, others the next day.

People who shave keep their head covered, pretty sure that is the case although I don't shave. (Chabad women don't, they might cut their hair short though)

Are you all allowed to drive within your communities?

Yes

@Jewishbookwork
im not sure if you missed my question or not but I am genuinely curious about your answer to it….