I have quite a different gifted child

[PennyRa]

Reading through the ama yesterday I realised I have quite a different gifted child on the severe end of the gifted spectrum. If you'd like, I can answer questions from a different perspective.

FAQs:

Are they Autistic?
Yes, on the far end of that spectrum too.

When did you know?
When they were 2 and went from nonverbal to reading out loud everything around them, followed by them demonstrating they could do arithmetics, and so on.

So they have hyperlexia and hypernumeracy?
No, upon testing we discovered they had full understanding. They just figured it out.

How's their emotional intelligence?
Very high too. As a 6 year old they were able to identify and discuss complex emotions characters might be feeling and potential motivations behind their actions in a way not even expected of GCSE students.

What areas are they gifted in?
They are globally gifted. It's not about subject areas, their brain just functions differently.

Are they in school?
There are no appropriate provisions available for children in this position. They would be in year 6 if they were.

Are they good at sports?
No, sports are physical so being gifted does not affect it. They are pretty average. Same for art.

Will they take their GCSES and A Levels early?
No, they could easily but there is no point. They may not take them at all, only if they become necessary for something they want.

Do they like the things other children their age typically do?
Some, they've never been interested in children's TV but some games, books, things like Lego.

What is the hardest part of having a gifted child?
It's a lot and very full on all the time.

What is the best thing about having a gifted child?
Seeing the amazing things they do with utter joy in their heart.

7 days a week is a lot. It sounds like they are trying to bury their anxiety in learning. That won’t help them in the long run.
Are they part of any groups/clubs outside the home? Have they had any form of therapy?

No, they are happy, and yes

We do child led, semi structured

I support my child in everything they want to do

Will your gifted child cope in the external adult world, support themselves and be able to thrive? On your current regime.
Parenting is not just about academic achievement, it's about teaching in life skills too.

What future are you preparing them for?

That's a bridge we will have to cross when we come to it. I was asked once by the LA what happens when they run out of maths? My child responded that they will discover more.

They get very destructive when bored. Not in a naughty way, in a I wonder how this works, I should take it apart to see, or this needs to be limit tested, or I wonder what would happen if, kind of way.

As expected the age old story here on mumsnet -

The moment home education is even suggested the totally uneducated and frankly ridiculous comments start rolling in!

“you need to send them to school to socialise, they aren’t in the real world”

“you aren’t even trying to encourage any socialisation?”

Why don’t you think they are socialising? I genuinely would love to know what evidence you have to show they aren’t!! Do you know the OP child’s weekly timetable?

To the people making short minded statements like these. Just stop! You know nothing about how successful home education is for millions of children around the world.

Home education is a lifestyle choice. Lifestyles include socialising. Our home education looks nothing like the lockdown home schooling that lots of people have been through - where children were restricted in their socialisation!

My children socialise every single day. They are confident, friendly and sociable. They are easy to talk to, make jokes and small talk. They are polite and kind and enjoy other peoples company. In a typical week they might socialise with family, larger groups, smaller groups, individuals, close friends, acquaintances, strangers. Of all ages, backgrounds, race, gender etc.

When my children socialise with peers who attend school you wouldn’t be able to tell which ones go to school and which ones don’t! I attended mainstream school myself and they are definitely more socially able than I ever was in my schooled years.

As an adult I’ve really learnt to realise - relationships and socialising - quality trumps quantity. Children who go to school might be ‘around’ other children more often but does this always equate to positive socialisation?!

My child might learn more socially from spending a couple of hours playing at a home Ed park meet up than a whole day in school. My children and my friends children still have conflicts and resolutions. They learn to appreciate everyone is different- just like many say children have to go to school to learn!

This isn't a post about me hating school ( I enjoyed a career myself as a primary school teacher for many years) but it is one to stand up to all the misconceptions about home Ed!

Just give home educating families a break!

What a boring post. Enough of the naval gazing by proxy OP!

I agree every child is different but it's fascinating to learn about these gifted kids - they have such unique qualities and struggles. I may have come across someone like them in the past but never been able to approach with questions so I personally don't think it's boring at all.

It's not easy, it's 100 times harder than raising an average child with none of the usual support or infrastructure

Maybe a home ed ama might help?

If there's a question that interests you I'd be happy to help

I'd be grateful if you could answer my question about what medical textbook/resource defines any medical 'diagnosis' of 'giftedness'? And what the diagnostic criteria is? As you claim it's a 'diagnosis'. As far as I'm aware it's not listed as such in the DSM or any other similar medical book of psychological diagnoses...?

What are their problem solving skills like? Have they ever done any of the Maths challenges run by ukmt?

I think awareness is important and when people feel comfortable asking questions it removes the mystery and stigma.

So it's usually by an educational psychologist and there are a few different assessments they can use. For those on the far end of the gifted spectrum they use one with extended norms.

I don't know what textbooks the doctors use to study this as I am not a doctor myself.

They have amazing problem solving skills, often they can see a solution instantly. We have been working on not immediately carrying out their first solution rather taking a moment to see if there is a more efficient solution possible.

Unfortunately those are only for school children, but they have done some unofficially for fun.

@PennyRa ukmt offer junior/indermediate/senior challenges for home Ed kids as well. www.ukmt.org.uk/what-we-do/advice-for-parents

Can my home-educated child take part in UKMT competitions?
Yes. Young people educated at home may participate in our competitions through a school that is a registered UKMT centre, at the discretion of the school. Parents or carers of home-educated young people should contact a nearby school directly to make such arrangements.

The schools won't take external candidates. At least not the junior schools

If you mean I said no learning today, well that's just not an option for us. Even Christmas, their letter to Santa has textbooks, electrical parts, and oranges because of tradition

Where I live G&T is not limited to academic subjects. It includes arts, sports, leadership abilities etc. So yes, a child can be physically gifted.

Are you in the UK @LadySweetPea ? Here when the government brought the term into schools gifted referred to academic ability and talented to music, sports, arts. It's not an official thing any more but Progress 8 was introduced to supposedly make sure schools were meeting the needs of all children academically.

Aware this is a dead post but stumbled across it. I think unless you have a gifted child (as distinct from "very bright") then you probably don't get it.

State schools in particular, and even private, don't have the resources to work with truly gifted kids in peer groups. It just is what it is.

Are they Autistic? You said on the far end. What does that mean?