I'm a wedding Registrar AMA

[Loveweddings]

I've been a part-time wedding Registrar for a couple of years and love my job. Happy to answer any questions.

Has anyone ever objected at the wedding?

Which is correct: Registry Office or Register Office, please?

Has anyone ever changed their mind as they say their vows?

Has anyone ever not turned up for their own ceremony? Do you ever suspect people for not taking their vows very seriously?

Do you have any big weddings planned over the winter months this year?

What's the latest anyone has been?

If someone writes their own vows, have there been times where they have been hilariously awful?

Do you get a feeling about whether the couples will go the distance? You must see some odd pairings

I've never had an objection but it's always a relief to get past that bit of the ceremony!

I would love to do your job!

I'm told lots are ex teachers, because they're used to public speaking and crowd control . Is that right?

Register or registration office are correct, but most people call it the registry office. Maybe that used to be the official term, I'm afraid I don't know.

Ooh timely. We're getting married in 2023.

Are there restrictions around vows? Ie what you can/can't include, length etc?

Is it possible/allowed to have an interpreter repeat what the registrar is saying in another language? (60% of our guests are my family/friends for whom English is a 2nd language)

How does it work now with signing the register? It's all digital?

Are kids allowed to be involved in the ceremony eg to do a reading?

Is there a limit on number of readings?

Re music; I understand it's not meant to be religious. Would eg "What the world needs now is love" be okay?

What an interesting job. Do you ever suspect any fake marriages (ie. For residency or whatever) ?

What's the most unusual venue you have been to?

I've never had anyone change their mind, but my colleague had a couple who had a blazing row during the ceremony! We have to be quite unflappable!

what is the difference between yourself OP a Registrar and a Celebrant 🌸

How can someone get into this as a job?
Thanks

Most of my weddings are at venues, with the bride and groom already there, so timings aren't often a problem. When I speak to the couple beforehand I do stress that they need to be on time, as depending on our schedule for the day, if the ceremony starts late we may need to shorten it, which we really, really don't want to do. To answer your question, only about half an hour.

Yes, several of my colleagues are / were teachers

How did you get the job, and what is the salary? Do you get a clothing allowance?

There are two of us at each ceremony, a registrar and a celebrant, but we all do both roles, so for some weddings I'm the celebrant and the others I'm the registrar.

Do most registrars specialize in marriages vs births and deaths or are you unusual in just doing marriages?

No question to ask but this has brought back happy memories. I temped for quite a while in a registry office in my early 20s and I loved working there.

Black dog - I don't have any really unusual venues in my area but have heard about a plane licensed for weddings which would be quite something, and would make for an amusing 'in case of emergency' speech!

Justajot, most councils employ Registration Officers, who work normal working hours and register births, deaths and marriages, and part time Ceremony Registration Officers who do weddings, mostly at weekends.

Someone on here wanted a couple of Mumsnetters to be witnesses in a place I was going to be on that day.

My friend wouldn't do it as she said things like that are connected to people trafficking and if it turns out to be a sham marriage then we, as witnesses, would be criminally liable.

Is she correct? What controls are there in place?