I home educate - my DS has never been to school - AMA

[OvertheUnicornRainbow]

My DS is almost 13, always been home-educated and is thriving. Ask me anything

@Yorkshire - I've already answered all this in detail. But to be brief:

How do I know he's thriving?
Is he happy? Yes
Does he have friends? Yes
Is he achieving his educational goals? Yes

A few of those goals are:
He has a goal to study GCSEs. He started English and Maths in September.
He has a goal to work on his Art - he does 2 Art classes and has resources at home.
He wanted to learn Japanese. He is studying this with a friend.

Bad Points
+Has to be a narrower curriculum / worry they miss their niche subject greatness

• Struggle / awkward / expensive taking exams
• Social ability with peers

Good Points

• You decide everything
• Inspections are not as bad as you'd fear.
• Better social interaction with adults

Good luck

I was informed by my local authority that three hours a day is considered equivalent to a full time school place.

The thing with experts v specialist is that am expert doesn't necessarily have any skill or aptitude on passing their expertise on. Some will others won't. That aptitude doesn't have to mean a PGSE or other QTS- lots of people who aren't teachers "teach", they coach, instruct, train etc. Lots of experts are brilliant at what they do but aren't able to break down how or why or to pitch information at the right level for novices, intermediates or enthusiastic amateurs. Many top sports coaches coach at a higher level than they ever competed at because doing and coaching are not the same thing.

I'm astounded that so many posters are so convinced about the universal worth of state schooling considering such a large number of children with additional needs are not getting these social and academic benefits and parents are often forced into home education.

@wintersweet1977 - thanks for your experience. I agree no school is perfect and no home-ed programme will be either. We just try and do what is best for each individual child.

@wintersweet1977 - that's interesting. Someone upthread had been told 5 hours per week.

Mind you someone else found they needed to do 5 hours work per week with their DC on top of school!

@wintersweet1977 How are you managing to be on benefits? Is your DC disabled? I ask because I had thought you had to be actively looking for a job, and that giving up a job to HE would mean you are not entitled to benefits?

@Whattheother2catsprefer - it's true what you say - not all 'experts' can teach. Neither can all teachers, tbf!

@OverTheUnicornRainbow I was surprised too! I'd worked it out to four hours a day if you take off all the getting coats/putting stuff away/shuffling about so I questioned it but the Home Ed officer said yes, 3 hours of 1-1 work a day is equivalent to the whole school day.

But at least with home-ed you don't have to put up with someone who can't teach. Bit more difficult at school.

@janemaster I have four disabled children, I don't know much about benefits outside disability benefits, maybe if you're on unemployment benefit you have to be looking for a job? I don't know really I've worked since leaving school up until taking my son out of school.

@wintersweet1977 - I have found home education to be extremely efficient. I would guess the true number of hours is a bit less than 3, even.

@OvertheUnicornRainbow I suppose it would depend on your child? Mine struggles to work independently and has just started to learn true learning skills. He masked at school and always copied other children's work to try and fit in. It can take quite a while to teach him new maths systems or new concepts.

@wintersweet1977 All parents of over 3-year olds have to be actively seeking work to get benefits. There is no such thing as unemployment benefit now, it is universal credit. There are different rules if you have disabled children, but I don't know much about that.
But I know I could not just give up my job to decide to HE and get benefits instead. That is why most HE families have 1 person earning enough to support the whole family.

@janemaster it was that or watch my son try and kill himself again. So yes we all make sacrifices, I don't go out with my friends, I don't buy myself new things and the children only get new things at birthdays/christmas, we cook everything from scratch and don't eat out. I don't drink or smoke and nearly all our money goes out on bills, mortgage, food, petrol and upkeep of house and car.

I didn't choose to be a single parent, my husband couldn't cope with the stress or embarrassment of having disabled children.

I would prefer to work and support myself and the children but my son's mental health comes before mine.

@wintersweet You misunderstand me. I am not and would never criticise anyone on benefits. I was trying to understand your situation. I was unemployed about 6-months ago so I know how it works, and I know you can't just opt out of working and get benefits. If you could, I would.

@winter - yes, definitely.

@janemaster - it is only UC in some areas. Most home-ed parents I know work. 1 parent supporting the whole family is not as universal as you suggest. But honestly leave @wintersweet1977 alone - it's none of your business what benefits she gets. That is really not what AMA is for.

@janemaster - she hasn't just opted out of work - she has caring responsibilities so the usual JSA rules don't apply.

I don't think Jane meant any harm. Let's not start a row over this now! Although I do think the system is unfair. If you want to home ed your children you should be supported to do so if you're a single parent, but with that should come an element of oversight.

@janemaster - why would you choose to opt out of work and get benefits if you didn't have to??

@wintersweet1977

Universal credit has been rolled out to all areas. And unemployment benefit you also had to be actively looking for work.
You misunderstand me, I don't care what benefits any individual gets. But the comment made it sound as if was possible to HE and get benefits to HE. But that is not the case.
And that is relevant to anyone considering HE. They need to know that for most families, you do need to be able to support yourself. Whether that is 1 or both parents working. That is not a value judgement. But parents do read these threads who are considering HE, so they do need to know facts.