I am an ex Jehovah's witness. AMA

[gem584848838]

Not sure if this will be of interest to anyone! As per the title I am an ex Jehovah's witness that had been disfellowshipped from the religion. AMA

What's the difference between Heaven and paradise on earth? Presumably Heaven is the main goal? In which case, isn't this like pyramid selling? I.e. The more people you convert, the greater chance of getting into heaven, but the harder it will be for those further down the chain to secure one of those 144,000 places in Heaven? I've never understood the logic behind their 'recruitment/conversion' process.

I don't fully understand the skirt thing. It was never really explained to me I just grew up accepting it. Btw just to confirm. JW women only have to wear a dress or skirt to the meetings or on the preaching work. They can wear trousers at any other time. Oh and if you are a non JW and walked into a meeting in trousers then you would not be turned away. This applies to those that are jws.

We were encouraged to only associate with those outside of the religion when necessary. E.g. work school etc. So them going to your house for playdates would not fit that category.. i know this sounds harsh but we were taught non believers were bad associations as they celebrated pagan festivals and holidays, didn't believe in Jehovah and may even be living in sin

Oh those bloody carts!!! No matter where I go I see them. Even when I went to Prague they were right outside my hotel!!

I'm afraid I can't answer your question as they didn't have them when I was in the religion..they have only come about in very recent years

Do JW's get any personal 'benefit' (can't think of the right word) from trying to save people? Does it give them a higher status in their church?

Hi @gem584848838

Like@Walnutwhipster I’m an ex as well, I walked away like her 21 years ago and I totally agree about the brainwashing etc. It’s hard to understand the level of control if you haven’t been exposed to it abd you d just seen the nice friendly reaching out side.

(They’re trained in how to do that, it’s not because they want to be your friend btw)

If you ever fancy a chat pm me. I know how hard it is to find yourself after all that and to an extent I’m still a work in progress 21 years on.

PS I think the trouser thing was to do with women wearing men’s clothing being a Bad Thing

Yes they are living with the thought that tomorrow Armageddon may come. It is TERRIFYING. Can you imagine being taught that as a little child? I still have nightmares about it.
That is how they keep people in the cult..constant terror. If you slip up today and Armageddon comes tomorrow, you may not survive

Would you really have refused a blood transfusion if it came to it and what are your thoughts on that now?

Sorry if this is too sensitive, but have you parents ever reached out to you or contacted you in secret?

Even though brainwashed, it must be devastating to them as well as you.

Wishing you strenght .

Ugh. Even if the adults truly believe it, it's child abuse.

We were encouraged to only associate with those outside of the religion when necessary. E.g. work school etc. So them going to your house for playdates would not fit that category

^This is really sad. It does fit with the 'brainwashing', in a similar way to them not being allowed to take part in activities at school to do with other religions, eg making lamps at diwali, taking part in Christmas play, etc.

There are a few JWs at my DC's school so I guess they don't feel too isolated, but it doesn't seem right to me that children can't learn about people's different beliefs, or non-beliefs. Surely that's what helps build tolerance and understanding.

No that is not how they believe heaven and earth works.

The 144,000 Are chosen, not by the order but they are called and chosen by god to be in heaven and rule with Christ. That means that they believe even now that people are still being chosen to go to heaven after Armageddon.

They believe that if you are in this select group that you will just 'know' that you will be going to heaven.
All other Jehovah's witnesses will remain on earth which will be a paradise like Adam and eve originally lived in.

Hope this makes sense, I am struggling to put it into words after all these years!

They don't get personal benefit as such but they would be viewed favourably e.g. if they had a bible student that was attending the meetings and doing well and progressing then this would reflect well on them and even more so if they got baptised

What do JWs believe happens to Bon JWs on the day of judgement? My reading of the book of knowledge (DHs friend was a JW and gave it to us - I used it for work) was that the 144,000 would go to heaven and everyone else would be recreated to a paradise earth? So no downside to not believing?

Sorry non JWs!

@RJnomore1 Thank you, that's really nice of you. We have to support each other becuase it is bloody hard. I struggle a lot but I know I could never go back. I need years of intense therapy due to that cult which unfortantly I can't afford!

Yes I would have refused a blood transfusion as I believed that it was better to die rather than sin. That was what they taught us
I would 100% accept one now if I had to have one
Btw I know a couple of people that were disfellowshipped for having blood transfusions!

Did you ever have any positive responses from knocking on doors? Did anyone ever want to join? (Not sure if join is the right word!)

It does get easier 💐

I have spoken to my parents over the years, only a couple of times like when my auntie was really ill and when I had to collect some things I had left in their attic. it's really sad as they've lost all their children as we've all left the religion and they are missing out on their granddaughter.
It was really hard when we did have contact those couple of times. I was really close to my parents but when I saw them they treated me like a stranger. I do feel like I don't have parents anymore.
I was actually in an abusive relationship not so long ago and I did go to them hoping they would take me in while i sorted myself out but they didn't

Do you speak another language? I was stopped by a couple Jehovah witness a few months ago and they told me that they chose to learn this particular language, they were preaching door to door, as part of saving people.

They seem to be a bit wishey washey with what happens to non believers at Armageddon and you may struggle to actually get a straight answer from them about this.
The answer is that non believers will not survive. Apparently by them doing the preaching work and trying to warn us all that is enough warning so if we haven't done anything about it it's too late!

This is quite different to my experience.
My mum was a JW - converted over 50 years ago after my sister was born. She went to about 3 meetings a week and then did her knocking on doors another day.
She did Christmas & Birthdays for us always, after we left home she stopped but would still buy us presents, just not wrap them in Christmas or Birthday wrapping paper. We respected that was what she did and she reflected that we weren't interested in joining her.
When she died, we had a JW Minister for the funeral & they sang a JW song but were quite happy for us to play other music etc that she liked at the funeral.
My mum's religion brought her a lot of comfort, she had good friends there & they were all v kind & supportive when she died.

So sorry about you parents and lack of support.

Do you have an ex-JWs community, where those who have escaped can seek support and you can talk experiences through?

Though she did say that she wouldn't let me have a blood transfusion so I was careful that she was never down on any forms as next of kin - even though officially she was! ☹️