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AMA

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Original poster

Im a retired shoplifter AMA

278 replies

WorkingGirlJem · 04/01/2019 15:17

That's it really. Have been a shoplifter for approx 10 years, and have recently decided to stop.
I'm not proud of myself, am fully expecting to get flamed, but and am hoping getting this out there will help with my resolve to stop permanently.
AMA

OP posts:
NeptuneNellie · 04/01/2019 22:02

Did you steal on impulse or was each item/shop planned in advance?
I initially thought you must see something and just pick it up, but it sounds like you planned.
I guess planning helps you not get caught?

Original poster
WorkingGirlJem · 04/01/2019 22:16

2018SoFarSoGreat
There was a kind of high from being successful, but mainly from not getting caught.
look back and cannot imagine how I was stupid enough to do it, and where I got the courage to think I could. Literally, it does not seem like me in any way.

^ this

OP posts:
Original poster
WorkingGirlJem · 04/01/2019 22:21

Neptune
Mostly it was impulse. I saw an opportunity and took it. Occasionally I decided beforehand that I wanted something specific and would have to plan how I was going to steal it and from where.

I would presume planning helps to not get caught, but I don't know.

OP posts:
OhioOhioOhio · 04/01/2019 22:29

I worked in a shop where a £600 winged wide open very large eagle ornament was stolen. Op you sound really nice but honestly stealing is such a selfish thing to do.

ColouringPencils · 04/01/2019 22:34

You mentioned how you have to concentrate very hard in the act of stealing, and with your medical degree and master's, I imagine you are cleverer than most. Maybe there is a bit of a thrill in using your brain to outsmart the system?

To stop you getting bored now that you have given up, maybe you could now think of a way to use your brain for good? How could you help people or make the world better?

Original poster
WorkingGirlJem · 04/01/2019 22:35

Ohio I wholeheartedly agree on both things , stealing is selfish, and no matter how big or heavy an item is, stealing it is possible.

OP posts:
MrsCar · 04/01/2019 22:37

Have you ever stolen something online?
I've never shoplifted, and not sure if I'm allowed to say this, but I have thought that it must be very easy when some items aren't tracked and traced... e.g. you could just say you never received the item and you'll be refunded? (Again, sorry MN if that's not allowed)

Original poster
WorkingGirlJem · 04/01/2019 22:44

ColouringPencils I don't believe I am particularly clever, I am just educated in my field. I do believe my way of thinking is different to most though, I don't always see things that are very obvious to others. However I do have a knack of seeing ways around things, so that obviously helped.

I am taking early retirement in a few years and I intend to dedicate time to work for free for those who otherwise could not afford my services. Again, I cannot elaborate as i'm scared I will out myself.

OP posts:
Original poster
WorkingGirlJem · 04/01/2019 22:48

MrsCar No, I haven't, although I am sure that would be fairly easy to do too.
I would worry that somebody would get the blame for that and it would be my fault.

OP posts:
HowlsMovingBungalow · 04/01/2019 23:01

You mentioned how you have to concentrate very hard in the act of stealing, and with your medical degree and master's, I imagine you are cleverer than most.

Really?

Fucks sake, what about a 20 something whose homeless and addicted to drugs and shoplifts to eat - got credit for them fucking the system to live? Nah I very much doubt they would get kudos.

Got a degree and a HCP? Shoplifting for 10 yrs because things are pretty and all that - Hat off to you for not thieving for Christmas.

OneStepMoreFun · 04/01/2019 23:04

OP have you ever wondered why some people can get away with it and others never could? It wouldn't occur to me to shoplift. I know I'd be caught. Everything about my body language and expression would giuve me away. I've never wanted to either, even when I've been poor.

How come I'm certain I'd get caught and you were so confident for so long that you wouldn't?

By the way I've had to deal with shop lifters and thieves in shops I've been in and every single one was a smartly dressed woman in a long belted coat of expensive, pale, heavy material. Is there a uniform?

Original poster
WorkingGirlJem · 04/01/2019 23:14

OneStepMoreFun I'm not sure why some get away with it but others don't. Is it a case of looking confident? Or maybe thinking outside of the box in the way that you go about it?
I wouldn't say I was always confident I wouldn't get caught, sometimes I just put it out of my mind. sort of pretended to myself that I was doing no wrong. Sometimes just hoped for the best.
As for the uniform I have no idea. I don't dress that way, and I've never met any other shoplifters in real life, only online.

OP posts:
BrylcreamBeret · 04/01/2019 23:41

You seem to be taking accountability for your actions op, that's quite brave. Have you considered that the items you stole (and still have) could benefit someone else? They wouldn't be around you, could be donated to charities/people in need and although it won't undo what you have done you will be atoning I suppose?
I doubt anybody saying harsh things here is as pure as the driven snow so please don't take the hurtful comments on board when you're clearly vulnerable.

Pinkyyy · 04/01/2019 23:44

I really find this post horrendous and I'm shocked than MNHQ are allowing it to stay.

ColouringPencils · 04/01/2019 23:47

Howls, I am not giving the OP kudos by saying she is clever. Unlike the drug addict, she has no need to steal, so I am speculating on what she gets out of it. If she doesn't recognise that, then I doubt she will stay 'retired' for long. Also, she had said that she couldn't think of a way to repay her crimes and I am suggesting that if she is clever she can probably think of a way.

Pinkyyy · 04/01/2019 23:50

If it bothered you that much and you really were disgusted with yourself, you'd give away every item you've stolen. But by the sounds of it, that's the entire contents of your house and you're not interested in giving back.

HowlsMovingBungalow · 04/01/2019 23:51

Pinkyy it is ok as the OP is terribly sorry for being a middle class thief.

Not driven snow here. I don't rock up on the internet stating how clever I was nicking stuff for 10 years and getting away with it.

HowlsMovingBungalow · 04/01/2019 23:54

Fair enough Colouring - I read your post all wrong. I see your point.

Pinkyyy · 04/01/2019 23:55

@HowlsMovingBungalow MNHQ should pass her details to the police along with this thread. Nobody is perfect but she's basically telling us all she's so tired of stealing and has given up now she's stolen everything imaginable and doesn't need anything else now, until her early retirement.

HowlsMovingBungalow · 04/01/2019 23:58

Agree with the thread being report 'worthy'. For sure!

MarilynSlumroe · 05/01/2019 00:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Botanica · 05/01/2019 00:04

If you at some time felt remorse and wanted to start to make amends, you could perhaps anonymously send a letter to the shops you stole from and tell them where their security gaps are and what further steps they could take to prevent theft.

That might also help you come to terms with not going back to that way of life, especially if you know you've closed off some of the opportunities you had.

Banjax · 05/01/2019 00:04

So, op, when are you planning to donate your stolen stuff to charity then? Seeing as you're all reformed etc?!

Pinkyyy · 05/01/2019 00:14

She won't give a single item away. Look at her list of what she's stolen-

soft furnishing/my clothes and shoes. My make up, perfume, jewellery, candles, photo frames, Freesat box, games, juicer, kitchen knives, china cups and saucers, bedding etc.
The list is massive and I don't like to think about it

That's pretty much everything but the food in the fridge, although I bet that's only because she's eaten the food she stole before her grand reformation.

TooTrueToBeGood · 05/01/2019 00:26

I never stole from independents or small shops

Good for you!
A few years ago i had the dubious pleasure of conversing with a self-confessed prolific burglar. He seemed to think he was not a bad egg because he only targeted well-off houses - people that could afford it and no doubt had insurance. I thought he was lower than scum regardless of his pathetic excuses. If you are a thief you are scum no matter who you steal from.