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AMA

I'm a radical unschooler AMA

999 replies

OutOfControlSpirals · 26/07/2018 15:22

I'm a radical unschooling mum, which basically means I've taken the principals of unschooling, where a child is free to learn what they want, when they want, and applied it to every aspect of our lives. So my children have the same freedoms that I do when it comes to eating/sleeping/learning etc.

OP posts:
glintandglide · 27/07/2018 19:25

I know that

Icecoldchilli · 27/07/2018 19:42

Whoever said there’s something about North Korea about the Unschooling community had it spot on

CaughtinaBadRomance · 27/07/2018 19:49

But people keep saying "I thought we were talking about unschooling? Not home educating."

It's like saying "Hold on, we're talking about geese here, not birds."

glintandglide · 27/07/2018 19:52

Because homeschooling is vast and wide in it’s scope. It is a child who doesn’t attend school, and that covers many ways of educating. This thread is specifically about radical unschooling. I think we all realise it’s a strand of home schooling, we’re not
Idiots -we,atleast,wenttoschool-

glintandglide · 27/07/2018 19:53

Can’t strike through though Grin

CaughtinaBadRomance · 27/07/2018 19:59

I'm aware that's a joke, but you just called a lot of people on this thread's children idiots. Well, you attempted to.

I think people have been far ruder to the home educators on this thread than the OP ever was to people who send their children to school, and haven't been called out on it.

glintandglide · 27/07/2018 20:02

It was obviously a joke. You said so yourself so not really sure what you’re point is?

CaughtinaBadRomance · 27/07/2018 20:07

I found it rude, and offensive. I don't think it's OK to say offensive things to other people as a joke.

glintandglide · 27/07/2018 20:11

Ok, that’s fine. But with the greatest of respect, I don’t really care.

You’re just desperate for an argument and sound professionally offended.
You were shouting about stuff that no one had even queried 50 minutes ago and it was obvious you were spoiling for a fight.

unlimiteddilutingjuice · 27/07/2018 20:23

Hi OP.
I was brought up by hippies and had a few friends like your kids growing up.
I agree, it's not neglectful patenting. Although it's arguably eccentric patenting and it's certainly parenting you get away with easier if if you have a little privilege under your belt.
In adulthood, I've kind of moved away from some of the hippy lifestyle, ironically because the values my parents taught me led me to socialism and I saw that a lot of hippy stuff is pretty individualist and kind of at odds with other left wing values.
My question is: Do you consider yourself left wing?
And,if so, how do you square that with withdrawing your kids from one of the best achievements of progressive politics-universal free education?

unlimiteddilutingjuice · 27/07/2018 20:27

"However there are likely to be a lot of parents out there who do think that just putting them in the local school will be enough."

Fucking hell! It really ought to be enough!

81Byerley · 27/07/2018 20:34

I'm the grandmother of 14 children. 5 of them went to school, the rest are, or will be, home educated. The eldest of these is 17, and currently is considering applying to go to Oxford University. Reading your posts, OP, is like a breath of fresh air to me.... and I was a conventional mother who sent her kids to school where they were bullied and didn't do very well. Now I see these delightful children, who are interested in the world, who are interesting and engaging. One of my grandsons taught himself to read at age six because "You see, Nana, I realised that G (big sister) was getting a lot of good information from books, so I thought I'd better learn to read so I could get good information too". His parents were following the Scandinavian idea of waiting until the child is 7 before starting to teach them to read, I think that a lot of people on here are not understanding that a child's thirst for knowledge, when unfettered by school timetables and sometimes disruptive classmates or even, sadly, sometimes poor teaching, can lead to that child really blossoming. My youngest grandchildren may not realise they are being taught, but when they help compile a shopping list, go to the shop and pick out items, help pay, come home, weigh and measure ingredients, have Mummy tell them they have to add a raising agent and why, time their cakes being cooked, they are learning. When their mother gives them kitchen scales and loads of pots and pans and utensils and they play in their mud kitchen, they are learning. I think at their ages this holistic way of learning maths, to tell the time, science, is wonderful. And there is time for them to concentrate on anything that they are really interested in, and develop those interests.

AssassinatedBeauty · 27/07/2018 20:37

"My youngest grandchildren may not realise they are being taught, but when they help compile a shopping list, go to the shop and pick out items, help pay, come home, weigh and measure ingredients, have Mummy tell them they have to add a raising agent and why, time their cakes being cooked, they are learning. When their mother gives them kitchen scales and loads of pots and pans and utensils and they play in their mud kitchen, they are learning. I think at their ages this holistic way of learning maths, to tell the time, science, is wonderful."

This is normal parenting, surely?

TheOnlyLivingBoyInNewCross · 27/07/2018 20:47

This is normal parenting, surely

Yes - what the bloody hell do some posters on here think those of us whose children go to school do with them when they’re not in school? Feed them instant noodles and leave them to play Minecraft?

Honestly, the smug, patronising, condescending attitude from those who think they are oh so unconventional is breathtaking!

SuburbanRhonda · 27/07/2018 20:49

I’m stunned by how unaware some people are of what conventional parenting looks like.

It’s almost as if they think if a child goes to school, the rest of the time they’re doing fuck all that’s interesting or challenging, and they’re never allowed to take the lead in normal family stuff or make their own decisions. The ignorance is frightening.

SuburbanRhonda · 27/07/2018 20:50

X-post theonly!

zzzzz · 27/07/2018 20:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Icecoldchilli · 27/07/2018 20:52

I wonder if the people who choose Radical Unschooling are more likely to be people who have had horrible upbringings, and therefore rebel against that and think they are doing something radical by being nice and kind to their children and nurturing them.

When in reality, many families who send their children to school will be nurturing, loving and happy homes. Not because any extreme lifestyle choice is being adopted, but because the parents are nice, well adjusted people who love their kids and are interested in them

zzzzz · 27/07/2018 21:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CaughtinaBadRomance · 27/07/2018 21:54

Glintandglide, what a strange thing to say. I don't want any kind of a fight, (and even if I did, would that make it fine to make offensive remarks about my children?) but I do want to sort out a few of people's misconceptions about home education. I don't think people want to hear, though, they just want to go on thinking the OP is abusive and her children are malnourished, ill-cared for and stupid.

Queenofthedrivensnow · 27/07/2018 22:55

I don't have a question just want to say thanks to @OutOfControlSpirals because it's such an interesting thread :-)

Incarnationsofunderstanding · 28/07/2018 00:47

Reading all this as a single mother who has no financial support from my ex (who funnily enough I also had reasons to marry and no intention to split up from) I’ve decided to jack in my job, buy lots of screens and radical unschool my 3 so I don’t give them MH issues in future from stress.

Of course you lot are going to have to pay for me but that’s ok right????

God this thread is full of privileged overthinking claptrap Hmm

Movablefeast · 28/07/2018 01:49

One of my best friends has home educated all 6 of her children. Her first two have both graduated from university, her third is studying engineering at university and getting excellent grades but he had to come home as he was suffering from so much anxiety. So although I love his parents and family and think they are raising their children very successfully, I think it is a fallacy that keeping children out of conventional educational environments will protect them from mental health issues.

The 20 yr old young man in question is wonderful and I don't know the story behind him developing anxiety but I know his girlfriend who was also home educated has an eating disorder and anxiety issues too. Home Education is not a panacea for all life's ills.

MrsFezziwig · 28/07/2018 02:26

Two things occur to me:

  • I would be really interested to hear from people who have already RU'd their children and what have been the results in the children's adult lives (bearing in mind that I don't suppose if RU has totally messed up their kids' lives that they will be too keen to come forward)
  • I do feel that If people start AMA threads (about anything) then they should be prepared to devote a decent amount of time to monitoring the thread and answering the questions that people pose. If they don't have that time to give, then they shouldn't start the thread in the first place. A lot of the hostility on this thread has been caused by the fact that the OP hasn't come back to answer a lot of the (mainly quite reasonable) questions that people have asked. AMA doesn't mean "ask me anything, but I will reply infrequently to a few questions which I choose, and I'll ignore any awkward ones".
Rebecca36 · 28/07/2018 02:40

Apparently the Scandinavian school system is run the way you are 'unschooling' your children - and it works! So good for you and I hope the children all turn out well.