I'm Jewish AMA

[Bobbiepin]

Just that really, brought up (relatively) orthodox if that makes a difference.

Please note, I have an opinion on the situation in the Middle East but I don't believe that Zionism is a part of Judaism and don't really want this to turn into a discussion over Israel.

Also, I can answer to my knowledge of the faith and my experiences, others may have differing understanding and wouldn't agree with my opinion.

Gorgon - JCoss may not be that religious but it is culturally very Jewish/ Israeli, and much of the social life in the first couple of years revolves around bar/bat mitzvahs. It is sometimes difficult for kids who aren't part of that crowd.

banana my family are all Russian/Polish Jews rather than German, although I am friends with one of the women in the documentary!

Sam that's a real shame to hear that jcoss is so cliquey. Despite having a thoroughly Jewish upbringing myself, I always felt slightly left out of things (I went to cheder and did various things at Noam and rsy netzer) and that was part of what drove me away and meant I ended up marrying out. I'm disappointed and sad to hear that things are no better now.

Gorgon, my sons' friend went to JCoSS and was very happy there and as far as I remember his father but not his mother was Jewish and it worked out fine.

Thanks Xenia that's good to hear.

My dd didn't have a bat mitzvah but did attend a few. I haven't found it particularly cliquey, not with her circle of friends anyway. I'm lucky I guess, she's found a group of lovely friends who are from all different backgrounds, some with only 1 Jewish parent, some observant, some not at all etc.

Thanks sunshine that's reassuring. I had thought that jcoss was more inclusive but Sam's comment that it wouldn't be suitable for my family was a bit concerning. (Again, probably not going to apply for faith school, but will see how the next few years pan out)

I remember quite a few years ago there was a programme (I think on the BBC) which followed the daily workings of a Beth Din. It was fascinating, I wish I remember what it was called.

Anyhoo! I can't remember why it done but I seem to remember that once a year (?) the Beth Din signed over their assets? to a gentile (I think in this case it was a trusted handy man) in order to comply with a certain law. The assets were only signed over for a day / week I think. I wish I remember more! Are any posters familiar with this custom?

Such a fascinating thread, thank you op

I would like to ask a very important question.... does anyone have a Chollah bread recipe? It's my favourite thing and I don't live in a Jewish area any more!

Hi been busy with my baby until now...
I have a few things to add-

Supporting families- many of them struggle, some are lucky that they have wealthy parents who support them- as studying is sen as a very special thing to do so people try to support when they can.

Menstruating women is not the reason men don't touch them. As sunshine said, it is to keep men as far away from even temptation. (I feel very protected by this...) A woman that is menstruating does not touch her husband until she has immersed in a ritual bath a week later. So that is where that comes from.

On passover, it is forbidden to own any Chametz, so the rabbi will sell it to a non jew for the duration of the holiday.

Challa recipe... ok.
1kg flour
1 cube fresh yeast
2 tablesp salt
1 cup sugar
1 cup oil
500ml water
crumble yeast and hide in flour. add rest of ingredients and mix on low for 10 mins. leave to rise until doubled in size. braid as you want. brush with egg and sprinkle sesame seeds. bake on 180 for approx 25 mins- until the underneath sounds hollow when tapped.
enjoy!

Rusty - I suspect it was Passover when they sold all their bread/whisky/etc to a non-Jew.

Gorgon - I had a friend who sent his child to JCoss recently. The son had had a brit but didn't really think of himself as Jewish - he had quite a miserable time, and left after only a term or so.

Thank you sam and Strict for answering!

A most interesting thread.

It appears to me that some Jewish observations are similar to Muslim observations.

Women not revealing hair
Not eating pork
Not shaking hands with women and so on.

Obviously there are similar observations in Christian religions, not eating meat on Friday, observing Lent and so on, but that is now optional and dying out really. Maybe that's just Catholic, but whatever.

I am referring to orthodox Jewish above I suppose.

Keeping the traditions is wonderful. I always liked the idea of the Sabbath meal. Are non Jewish allowed to partake/participate in this.

I’ve heard the opposite about JCOSS, that it’s extremely inclusive and although the first couple of years do revolve around bar / bat mitzvah’s it’s not particularly religious and there are dozens of children from mixed faith families. It is however, very pro Israel and lots of Israel celebrations / trips etc which they’re very open about

My children are at one of the other Jewish schools and even there there are loads of kids with one non Jewish parent and nobody could care less

Bottom line is that the Jewish state secondary schools are all superb academically and a viable alternative to a lot of the private schools so parents of levels of faith will give them serious consideration and possibly overlook the bits they’re not keen on

I’m totally atheist, culturally Jewish but absolutely not observant and getting less so as I get older. However, I love Jewish schools because of the tradition they instill. I want my kids to be totally comfortable with all Jewish parquet, ritual and tradition. If they choose to ignore it all as adults that’s their decision but they’ll do it from a place of knowledge. It’s weird because we will still do Friday night most weeks, even if it’s a barbecue, i wouldn’t dream of not having a Seder or a rose hashannah meal with apple & honey, or a yom kippur break the fast despite not believing, it’s v odd and I can’t quite explain it.

Despite my lack of belief I can’t bear the thought that they couldn’t say Kaddish, lead a Seder, make kiddish it would be unthinkable and I’d feel I had failed.

I feel very similarly @careerontrack. I'm not that bothered about observing anything myself, but I'm glad my daughter has options now. She went on Israel Tour last year (not through school) and also to Poland this year (with school) and although I suspect she'll ultimately marry out one day, I'm glad she's got a good basis and knowledge about Judaism and her history so she can make her own choices.

Do you think there is a whiff of hypocrisy about some Jewish communities? I live in Manchester and there is a large Jewish community in Salford. Outsiders might see them all as devout, family orientated etc but several have hit the headlines over the years for everything from insider share dealing to running drugs and brothels.

@keyboardkate absolutely, non-Jewish people are often welcomed to the Sabbath meal on Friday night.

My daughter is obsessed with the tv show Friday Night Dinner. It was on channel 4 and is now on Netflix I believe. I've only seen a few episodes. It is a comedy so obviously things are exaggerated etc but it's got some truths in it too.

Such an interesting thread.
What is shul and eruv ?
Because there is a lot of intermarriage are there problems associated with that ( genetic problems for children as has happened with Pakistani Muslims in some area of UK ) ?
Why are boys circumcised ?
Why are so many of the world's wealthy Jewish ?
I live in Ireland where the Jewish population is shrinking. I grew up
in an area where there were quite a few middle class Jewish families but they've all gone now.

I am totally glued to this thread. Thanks for starting it, OP. I am half Jewish (wrong half as someone once charmingly told me), dad not observant at all, and have grown up outside of and with very little knowledge of Jewish cultural and religious traditions but with a very definite feeling of Jewishhness. Interestingly my 10 yo DS seems to have developed the same feeling, I'm not sure why.

(Btw re some opinions expressed earlier in the thread, I would consider it absolutely bonkers if someone thought I was more Jewish than a Jewish convert!)

@bananafish81 my application is in! Not heard back yet though.

@bananafish that’s such a sad story re your mother. I have some family members like that rabbi you mentioned (super strict and imo intolerant). They really get my goat.

I am trying to get my ex to get German citizenship for my dcs. I have another Eu country but can’t pass it on unless I take them to live there. He’s not very organised though.

I am not a big fan of traditional ashkenazi food generally, sozzles. Fish balls I think are rank, fried or not! With the exception of sweet kugel, maybe. And matzo balls at psach.

Although I am not Sephardi I like their food. Melawach, shakshuka, falafel all that sort of stuff is great.

@Limpopobongo I don't think it is hypocrisy on the part of the community, but on the part of the individuals commiting these crimes. There will always be some rotten apples! note though, media jumps on the fact that they are hassidic. You won't see a headline- Devout Christian caught drug smuggling

@beanaseireann Shul is the place where the prayer service takes place 3 times a day.
Eruv is- we are not allowed to carry in open places, so actual fences/ poles/ strings are put up to allow people to carry within its boundaries. This is done by a group of rabbis who have studied the laws of eruv extensively. Anyone from Manchester- on Bury New Road, at the edge of The Cliff- The old metal railing were replaced a few years ago for the eruv.
There are some genetic diseases that are found in Ashkenazi Jews. There are organisations that test prior to marriage to help this problem.
Bris Milah is a convenant betweeen man and g-d, and also, to show man that he is not born perfect and needs to work on himself to become a better person.

@sunshinewithabitofdrizzle

thanks for that. Now need to find some Jewish people who might invite me!

Because there is a lot of intermarriage are there problems associated with that ( genetic problems for children as has happened with Pakistani Muslims in some area of UK ) ?

Yes there are a number of genetic diseases within the Ashkenazi Jewish community - I posted this link up thread
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/MedicalgeneticssofJews

However unlike the Pakistani community where there is a significant amount of denial about the medical implications of inbreeding, and there is a very concerted effort in the Jewish community to encourage genetic testing, and many couples will undergo IVF with PGD and / or CVS testing in pregnancy, with many couples opting for TFMR if a baby is affected with a fatal or life limiting genetic condition

This is one charity with more information about the Jewish genetic diseases and promotion of genetic counselling and testing

www.jnetics.org

I am loving this thread! I am currently undergoing a Liberal conversion. My Jewish partner had a traditional upbringing. We started attending a Liberal Synagogue when our dd was about 4 and attend very regularly. I didn't decide to convert for some years, but decided one day that this was the 'right time'. We are quite involved in synagogue life and there are lots of mixed faith couples and converts who attend. It is a really inclusive community.

We, too have looked at getting our child a passport from an EU country - in all honesty a cynical move on our part, in that we hope in might provide some sort of benefit after Brexit. It is interesting that Germany is allowing descendants of refugees to apply for passports. I have looked at the regulations for obtaining a Polish passport, as my partner's father was born there before WW2. From reading them, it appears to me that it is not possible to obtain citizenship if your ancestor left Poland - which is very different from Germany's approach - and as we know, jews at that time didn't have the opportunity to stay there. Just wondered if anyone else had looked at this?

Hi everyone, sorry I've been a bit absent today, been very busy and been watching the football (wish I hadn't though).

@sunshinewithabitofdrizzle may I ask who your DD went on tour with? Don't worry if you don't want to share that information though.