I have quite severe anxiety, so I’m aware I can overthink situations, but I’ve worked myself into a real panic over this and would appreciate some honest outside opinions.
I’ve worked with a male colleague for around 18 months and we’re actually quite close mates now. We chat regularly, have lots of banter and sometimes flirty joking, but I don’t have romantic feelings for him. We talk about personal things and generally get on really well.
My company is going through potential redundancies at the moment, and on Friday I was having a real panic about my job. I kept bringing it up with him because I wanted reassurance, but he tried to change the subject a few times and eventually said something along the lines of “I don’t talk about this anymore” I could tell it was his usual cheeky personality as in a way to say to me that I’d already been told everything was fine.
We carried on chatting, and I again kept brining up my worries because I am genuinely anxious and he’s someone I consider a safe space at work and when I mentioned what his weekend plans are we basically said ‘don’t act like you’re now interested in me lol!’ and he wished me a nice weekend. Afterwards, I messaged jokingly asking if he was angry with me, but he read it and didn’t reply. He’s normally very responsive, so this has really worried me.
The thing is, earlier today he’d invited me for coffee because I’ll be working at an office near his, and we’d also spoken on the phone so I could give him some advice about an email he needed to send. So we were still having normal, friendly interactions.
My anxiety has now convinced me that he might report me to HR over Friday, that I’ve crossed a line and that our friendship is over. I know I probably went on too much about redundancy, but I was genuinely panicking and he’s someone I consider a friend. We speak and banter all the time.
Am I reading far too much into him not replying, or would you be concerned? Could someone genuinely go from being close mates with you to reporting you over a conversation like this?
Please be kind, as I’m really struggling with my anxiety over this, like I’m really hypersensitive this week as the redundancy consultation is coming to an end next week, I’ve got my 2nd therapy appointment tomorrow and I suffer with anxiety anyway, but I would appreciate honest opinions.