AIBU? Male work colleague

I think you are silly to talk about your real, actual worries in a 'jokey' way. As for all this banter, just stop it. I hope your job is secure.

I've reported this thread as a wind-up.

It could be a wind-up, but, equally, it could be genuine. It's hard to know which is worse: if it's a wind-up, the poster is despicable for wasting people's time. It it's genuine, it's hard not to feel sympathy that a fellow human being lives with such torment.

Respectfully, @mumlearningtorun, you need to stop throwing around terms you’re completely misusing. What you describe (endlessly bothering your colleague for reassurance about your job) isn’t a ‘panic attack’ — a panic attack is a set of physical symptoms like dizziness, chest pain, shortness of breath, rapid heart rate, that lasts a relatively short time but is terrifying. When I described the symptoms of one to my GP years ago (I thought I’d had a heart attack, despite being a fit, healthy woman in my 30s), he sent me straight for an ECG to rule out anything organic, then prescribed beta blockers and therapy.

Just like you don’t ‘have PTSD’ from thinking you were going to lose your job last year. PTSD is a real condition, to do with having experienced something shocking/life altering/life-threatening. Could be active combat, rape, abuse, a serious accident, a natural disaster etc etc.

You're not having a panic attack and you don't have ptsd. You do need medical support though

I'm not sure you should be using terms like PTSD (which people suffer after significant trauma like rape, human trafficking, or being present at a natural disaster or incident such as a plane crash), or panic attack (when your breathing is very rapid and your heartbeat very high). You have described a conversation that has caused you to be anxious, with spiralling thoughts.

Where are the expected boundaries here as not only do you work together but you have partners at home.?

Platonic friendships are obviously possible but do you think he has misread the signs of dependency you were giving out? . You need to back pedal a bit and give him a break for a few weeks as it's clear he was finding you a bit intense. Work place friendships can be almost as awkward as work place romances, if there is a falling out. Respect his boundaries, and maybe message him in a few weeks with a bland message like ' sorry I've not been in contact for X weeks but I've been really stressed recently. I'm back on track now, if you'd like a catch up soon. No pressure!'

Try to be less self-absorbed in future. People who witter on about their own mental health tend to be less bothered about that of others.

Now that's not logical. Surely you would take steps to fix the friendship so he wouldn't report to HR, not risk finding out that he had reported to HR and then tried to fix the friendship. That would be closing the stable door after the horse has bolted.

Have you read your company's behaviour policy now? If so, has it reassured you that there are no grounds for him to report you to HR?

I’m agree. Throwing around PTSD like this is fairly insulting to those who actually have it.

Knowing someone who does you aren’t even close.