AIBU to feel unfairly ostracised after a joke at the sports club?

I have gay friends who adopted 2 children a few years ago, so i know it’s possible. It was more a comment based on things she’d said. She was holding another baby and saying that she can’t wait to be a nanna. I said well I don’t think it will happen soon. She had openly said that neither of the girls were settled and had made a big thing about the boy being gay. She has actually taken it out of context because it wasn’t just directed about the boy. But that’s how she’s seen it and made it sound.

I have gay friends who adopted 2 children a few years ago, so i know it’s possible. It was more a comment based on things she’d said. She was holding another baby and saying that she can’t wait to be a nanna. I said well I don’t think it will happen soon. She had openly said that neither of the girls were settled and had made a big thing about the boy being gay. She has actually taken it out of context because it wasn’t just directed about the boy. But that’s how she’s seen it and made it sound.

Do the exact biological details really matter?!

Sorry but that's a weird thing to say and it sounds like you wouldn't treat e.g. adopted kids as part of the family. I remember someone making a similar remark around another family member who was adopted, and felt awful for them.

However, no idea why a safeguarding person was involved?

The people that think the step mother was in some way being homophobic or inappropriate by saying he was “as gay as they come” are the ones who are (probably subconsciously) thinking in a homophobic way - because you’re assuming being gay is a negative thing. There’s nothing wrong with being “as gay as they come” - it likely means he’s very camp & loves going out dancing on the gay scene. So what’s wrong with saying this is what he’s like? Flip it to something most people generally see as being positive - being strong and fit say, if she said her step son likes going to the gym and said he’s “as fit as they come” (obviously fit meaning it’s original meaning, not attractive!) would anyone bat an eyelid? Apart from to perhaps accuse her of boasting. No they wouldn’t because people see that as a positive thing. If you see being gay as negative then you’ll see something wrong with being “as gay as they come”