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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to find one-issue personalities rather tedious to be around?

141 replies

Dovesono · 05/09/2026 21:16

AIBU to think the people who make one aspect of themselves their entire personality are extremely tedious?

(Feeling irritated by someone in my life who does this and wondering whether others have had a similar experience.)

I don't think it really matters what the particular aspect is - whether it's a hobby, one's gender or sexual identity, a sporting ability, being a parent, having had an unusual experience - people who only want to talk about one thing (i.e. themselves) and who bring it up at every available opportunity are invariably very tiresome in my experience.

As an example, I was once queuing for an event with a friend and we got chatting to the people in front of us in the queue. This friend brought up his particular "thing" no fewer than three times, despite the other queuers not knowing him from Adam and clearly being completely uninterested in the occasion when he fell off a horse in 1998.

Or maybe I'm just an misanthropic GOW...

OP posts:
Error404FucksNotFound · Yesterday 17:47

I agree. It's very dull.

Mondaytuesdayhappydays · Yesterday 17:53

ScribbleTree · Yesterday 07:09

I find it worse in late-diagnosed adults. The ones who are normally in established relationships, have kids, have a job and are superficially at least functioning in life. They shoehorn anything to do with ADHD into conversation, constantly talking about overwhelm, being dysregulated, RSD and worst of all inserting ‘dopamine’ into every other sentence. In a way they never used to.

Yup
Drives me potty
that and the ‘peri’ bullshit

Mondaytuesdayhappydays · Yesterday 17:59

Professional ‘tight’ Scots /Northerners
Women on the jabs - previously Slimming World or WW

Mondaytuesdayhappydays · Yesterday 18:01

Protein …

Dovesono · Yesterday 18:07

I'm wondering whether these are the same people that think every Mumsnet post is directed specifically to them.

Example 1:

OP: I'm looking for suggestions for a new family car. We have four children and drive mainly short distances. Budget about £12K.

Random Poster: I can't help you as I don't drive.

Example 2:

OP: I just bought some fantastic new shoes from [insert shoe shop]! They're quite pointed, but really comfortable. Available in various colours and currently 20% off.

Random Poster: I had a freak childhood accident with my big toe which means I can't wear pointy shoes. How ableist of you to start a thread about them!

OP posts:
TheIncredibleBookEatingManchot · Yesterday 18:29

There was a woman my mum knew when I was young, whose entire personality seemed to be that she'd lived in the same suburb all her life.

She'd always say things like, 'I've lived here all my life and it hasn't rained like this since 1962 and the main road nearly flooded.'

Or 'I've lived here all my life and I remember when they opened the greengrocers.'

Every time we saw her she found some reason to mention she'd lived there all her life.

It was a very boring place and I always wondered why she seemed it was something to boast about.

I remember once she began a sentence with 'I've lived here all my life' my mum exclaimed, 'oh, really! I didn't know that! How amazing!'

I thought my mum was having a weird memory lapse at the time but in hindsight she had probably got fed up of this woman constantly telling her she'd lived there all her life and finally snapped and responded sarcastically.

whatwouldlilacerullodo · Yesterday 18:31

AquamarinePearlGold · Yesterday 07:44

You sound unkind.

Thanks. As a "healing C-PTSD ADHD post-menopausal woman" I'm very proud of putting myself first sometimes. I'm being kind to myself.

whistlesandbells · Yesterday 18:37

Katflapkit · Yesterday 03:15

My DD started University (not UK) this week and her class have been meeting up to get to know each other. She said one girl was introducing herself as Hi I'm Alice I have ADHD. In their first class, she did the same thing and the Lecturer said 'No, don't lead with that, don't make it your personality'. Apparently she left the class crying.

This is excellent and gives me hope.

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · Yesterday 18:41

I knew a ‘military wife’ and all she talked about were military rankings and all of the people her husband outranked.

It was like a weird cult.

Fedupcreative86 · Yesterday 18:57

ZorbaTheHoarder · Yesterday 07:59

The worst was the woman in Nando's, who went on about being "peri-peri"...

Looool that's all I think of whenever I see "peri" on here or SM 🤣

TrojanDonkey · Yesterday 19:00

I worked with someone a long time ago who only spoke about her child. Nothing else.

Mondaytuesdayhappydays · Yesterday 19:08

TrojanDonkey · Yesterday 19:00

I worked with someone a long time ago who only spoke about her child. Nothing else.

My boss talks about her two GC’s constantly

She couldn’t tell you how many kids I have let along DGCs

Themsofcoffee · Yesterday 19:19

grinandslothit · Yesterday 03:11

Yes adults who drone on about the thing and make it their entire personality and yeah they will say it no less than five times when meeting someone. I think since I'm so old I've heard it change up over the decades depending on what was trending

Let's see, fixations I've heard lately

Witchy things
Bisexual
Neurospicey( I am and and can't stand that twee term)
An ally for anything
Politics
Going nc with people
Influencer

Past fixations I've heard
Race
Gender
Country
Self harm
OCD
Depression
Anxiety
Digitalnomad
Being homeless
Gifted and talented both themselves and or children

To be fair, looking at your list, if i were homeless i would be fixated on it as an issue.

Barney16 · Yesterday 19:23

A friend of a friend is obsessed by how fantastic Germany is. Everything comes round to how much better it, whatever the conversation is about, is so much better in Germany. Public transport, local government, buffets, the press, bank holidays. All much, much better in Germany. It doesn't matter what the conversation is about, he talks about Germany. Exhausting.

Platypusdiver · Yesterday 19:30

Oh bugger! This has made me realise that I insert the dog into most conversations.

Doing it now... (I promise to be more aware and less irritating in the future.)

demantoid · Yesterday 19:30

Twoweeksinaugust · 05/09/2026 23:20

I get you OP. The "It's gin o'clock somewhere" brigade who are basically functioning alcoholics in floral dresses and white trainers get to me most, closely followed by vegans, I've never met a vegan who isn't vocal about it.

Except, you probably have. You wouldn't have a clue if they didn't tell you.

For me it's people who use 'something...brigade.' It always sound so narrow and intolerant.

grinandslothit · Yesterday 19:43

Themsofcoffee · Yesterday 19:19

To be fair, looking at your list, if i were homeless i would be fixated on it as an issue.

I should have clarified they were former homeless as in 10 years ago

RiderGirl · Yesterday 19:44

RampantIvy · Yesterday 07:28

All the vegans I know don't conform to your stetotypical view of them. They are well rounded people who don't talk about their dietary preferences.

Some horsey people bore me to tears. Horse riding is a hobby as far as I'm concerned, but I know some horsey people who talk about nothing else.

I've got a horse, I've had her for years and years but I don't go on about it - there's a woman at work who also has a horse and every single time I see her I have to listen to her tell me about their latest dressage competition, or the new saddle she's bought, or the new lorry she's bought - I seriously Could. Not. Give. A. Fuck, leave me alone.

I'm also a parent although mine are somewhat grown up now, but I hate it when some of the women talk non stop incessant drivel about their babies/young children - I get, they're wonderful, I was there once, but can we talk about ANYTHING else please!!!

CruCru · Yesterday 19:48

Mondaytuesdayhappydays · Yesterday 19:08

My boss talks about her two GC’s constantly

She couldn’t tell you how many kids I have let along DGCs

I think this is the thing. I have let a couple of friendships drift because they would talk AT me and look quite perturbed when I leapt in to say something (anything!) about myself. I realised that, if they were to be interviewed about me (although that is very unlikely) they wouldn’t know what to say. Maybe they would just make it up.

One person made the conflict in Israel / Palestine the only thing she would talk about. I would change the subject and say vague things like “Oh, I’ve never visited Israel” and she would just carry on.

CruCru · Yesterday 19:49

I once told my boss (and a load of other men) that they had to be able to talk about something other than football.

Nofeckingway · Yesterday 19:50

Have you ever been around them when they've had a few drinks ? Commonly known as pub bores and everyone avoids them .
Topics within my family include

Trump
American politics in general
Liverpool football
Conspiracy theories regarding migrants

We are not American or Scouse or live anywhere affected by migrants . Bore off who cares.

CruCru · Yesterday 19:53

I used to go out with someone who was tall (maybe 6ft 4). He would shoehorn how tall he was into conversations where it didn’t belong.

itsallaboutmememee · Yesterday 19:57

TrojanDonkey · Yesterday 19:00

I worked with someone a long time ago who only spoke about her child. Nothing else.

Dp worked with someone like this

'Josh,josh josh,josh,josh,josh'

He steered me away from her at the Christmas party

misspositivepants · Yesterday 20:03

My son’s best friend mum is like this, she drops into how her children were breastfed into every single conversation, the last time she breastfed her child was 5 years ago. I also breastfed my children but it’s not something I feel the need to drown into every conversation.

can’t wait for the time when they can socialise independently

WrongWomen · Yesterday 20:20

My mother - illness, medical procedures, death of people i don't know ..it's extremely trying!

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