to expect 51 year old DH not to look at 20 year olds?

Hahaha yes, so he's either gay or a big liar! 😆

Inappropriate turning to stare, but fine looking. A little disrespectful too.

‘Stop being such an obvious lecherous old man, Dave, it’s gross’.

Call him out!

I feel sorry for you I wouldn’t be able to cope with this and would have to say something, I always wanted a girl, but glad I got two sons for this reason.

This! I'd be shaming him right there and then

The marriage might as well be over if you're calling each other names like "lecherous old man" (even if true). Why not skip the name-calling step and just leave him

What about having attractive female TV stars in their 20's in their Instagram following list? Is that the same?

I wasn't talking about whether they'd want to or not want to, I was calling out the terminology being used.

My dad used to do this to young women and girls when I was younger, I hated it. He then ran off with a 26 year old when he was about 54.

My understanding was that she had walked by and had her back to him. How was he eye fucking her?

All this talk of whether a young woman would be interested in him is what's pointless. He wasn't trying to signal his interest to her.

Likewise the talk of disrespecting his partner - she was (he thought) unable to see him.

Look id be pissed off in OP:s shoes no doubt about it. I'd feel like he was an embarrassment and sort of be turned off him briefly. But that's all. He didn't set out to hurt her, humiliate her or interact with the random young woman. She is giving this way too much headspace starting a thread about it. It was a random look, that is it!

Myself and DH are into fitness and go to a local gym which we joke is wall to wall bros standing in front of mirrors admiring their pecs. The women are the same. We go because it's handy and the equipment is really good.

Both sexes look absolutely amazing physically. I often find myself admiring someone's physique. The women mainly work out in fitness gear that is basically bikini tops and teeny shorts. Does my DH ogle them when I'm with him? No way, never. Would I be gobsmacked if I was in there sometime unbeknownst to him and spied him admiring someone as she was walking out the door oblivious? I'd feel a pang but then I'd just tease him.

This post is an odd mix of both being very prudish and very crude.

Very prudish because there only needs to be a 20 or so age gap between a couple for the woman to be young enough to be a daughter.
Is a 35-year-old woman and 55-year-old man weird?
I don't think so.
You're also insisting elsewhere that no women in her twenties could ever find a man of 50 attractive when on fact if he's in good shape, handsome, charismatic etc they very much do.

And it's not because he's necessarily rich or she has daddy issues.
It's because he may be sexy as hell.

And very crude because as disrespectful as this man is, I don't think he was 'eye-f*ing' her at all. Just thinking 'wow she's sexy!'

What a dreadful phrase eye-f*ing is.

So a mindset much displayed on mn that nobody can get with anybody within 1 year of their birth combined with extreme unwarranted crudity.

Looking is fine, gawking is not.

Nah I wouldn’t like this even without the turn around. His daughter will be an older teen soon. He is creepy as fuck.

And what’s your opinion on 20 year old men and a woman in her 50s?

Well said.

God, how awful for you. I'm so sorry.

One of the reasons I find it so repellent is that my dad and my brothers absolutely never, and I do mean never ever, behaved like this. They'd notice I'm sure but never leer, slobber or perve. The most I ever heard my dad saying about a woman was an actress on TV and he said I always thought she was very pretty, it stands out in my memory because it was so rare for him to comment on a woman's looks.

It's weird to me how many people think it's normal for men to behave like this - especially when we all know they just wouldn't if she was with a large, scary man glaring at them, or in a job situation where they might get sacked. Everyone has the ability to behave properly, and if they don't they can stay home.

Everyone notices, nobody has to ogle, perve or leer. It's offensive, anti social, unacceptable and disrespectful to everyone, not just his wife.

And again, I'm really sorry your dad did this to you and your family.

It's human nature. People don't suddenly stop finding young people attractive at a certain age. They just learn how to act 'decently'.

The difference is that women generally tend to prefer 'men' over 'boys', and males usually look much more masculine from about 30 onwards - bigger build, facial hair thickening with age, etc.

However, most women don't look better at 35yo than 25yo unless they were a chubby and lost it or something like that. I'd wager most women would find a 35yo rugby player more attractive than most guys in their 50s purely from a visual standpoint (which is how men tend to be wired).

You obviously don't know what a paedophile is if you think they're attracted to women of 20😂 And I'm not married to anyone yet.

'A chubby individual' not 'a chubby'! I'm not referring to the obese as 'chubbies'.

Nope, you attempted to claim that if a man isn't attracted to "young girls" (the exact phrase) he is gay or lying. My assumption that you are married to (or dating) a paedophile if you think this is true is correct.

Nope. It's not human nature to be a leering, slobbering old perve.

As has been repeated ad absurdum - both sexes look all the time and both sexes are perfectly capable of looking and looking away. Men do not behave like this when they are likely to be punched in the face or sacked and most men do not behave like slobbering, leering creeps in public.

OP should never have known what her husband was thinking. We all look, we all notice, all the time. Both sexes. And we all control ourselves and don't act like sad old perverts from a Benny Hill sketch, most of the time.

I find it amusing that you take issue with the word I use to describe a man old enough to be the father of young woman barely out of her teens blatantly slavering over her, and not the action of the man.

Eye-fucking is very accurate; having read and heard men talk about it, he's almost certainly thinking 'yeah I'd like to fuck that', not something so adorably mild as 'she's sexy', and even thinking 'she's sexy' is leching and objectifying – AKA eye-fucking.

I dont have an issue with age gaps, as someone who likes older men (as I said), but 20 and 50s is disgusting on the part of the older person. Generally, I think if the gap is bigger than half your age plus seven, the power differential and life stages are too different.

You're hilarious 😁 It seems you actually don't know what a paedophile is. For your information it's someone attracted to PREpubescent girls or boys, not a perfectly normal man who finds sexually mature young women attractive.
A lot of women on here can't bear to acknowledge that it seems, it's pretty amusing to me.

'Eye-fucking' just means he was blatantly, crudely leching – its not about whether or not she notices. And he was. He turned his head to watch her go past, so he could soak up every little bit of her body for his visual pleasure, and keep her in his eyeline for as long as possible. It's pathetic, and disgusting.

Noticing is fine, but ogling is gross.