Are you a girls girl? Annoying neighbour isn't

I get on better with men than with other women, always have, even my friends at primary school were boys. I find them easier to chat too, non-judgemental, funny, and not gossipy or bitchy.

Don't get me wrong, I don't get on with all men, but I do find it much easier to have a chat with men generally speaking.

I'm not from the area I live and I find the women in this area are generally snobbish, look down their nose at people with my accent, and are incredibly two-faced, so I tend to steer clear of them. Don't get me wrong, I do have female friends here, good ones, but they are the rare exceptions!

What has tweeness got to do with it?

I know women like this and I don’t trust them

Haven't really had this, but can't you just carry a hockey stick around with you and hack her at the ankles when she starts flirting??

Same here.

After many bad experiences with women friends, I’m far more comfortable with men. Doesn’t mean I’m trying to shag them or oust their wife though. Women are just hard work.

Yes, I'm a woman's woman. I'd be focusing on you. Ime men don't need encouragement to talk and make their unfunny jokes at me. I'm the exact opposite of your woman, in that I try to give them as little attention as possible to discourage them. They also have a habit of thinking you're interested in them if you behave like she did.

I know what you mean. As a child aged around 8yo i went into school to find that my so called best friend has arranged for all the girls to sit on a long table, excluding me.

I went up to the teacher to ask for this situation to be sorted out. She said, just sit on one of the boys' tables. So I sat on a table of 3 boys, and had an epiphany- that boys were way more straightforward.

What does she do for work?

I'm friends with women and men equally but when it comes to small talk (which is what talking to neighbours is) I sometimes find it easier with men, I think because I've worked in male dominated fields for so long that I've been socialised into male small talk.

She just sounds socially awkward, maybe she finds it easier to try and impress men than speak to women and make real connections.

I think it’s pretty normal for women to be friends with other women, that doesn’t make you a girls girl, it just makes you normal.

There’s a woman DH and I know like this, she’s a school mum. She deffo fancies him and whenever she talks to him he makes a point to shoehorn me into the conversation and refer to me as “my lovely wife”. She eventually stopped talking to him but I always make sure to give her a little wave when I see her (I have to physically stop myself bearing my teeth and growling at her I can’t lie).

I would say I’m a girls girl (or woman’s woman if you wanna be pedantic). I’ve never really enjoyed the company of men, but weirdly I get on way better with my brothers than I do my sister. I would class two of my brothers as my actual friends and the other two I’m pretty close to. My sister on the other hand… drives me up the wall. I always wanted to have a sister I got on with and I’ve always been super jealous of close sisters. I’m also way more inclined to take a woman’s side or be more sympathetic to a woman - men get enough sympathy.

I am like OPs neighbour. Because the husband is generally a friendlier person than the wife and the wife and I don't seem to have much in common. It's not a male attention thing.

She sounds male-centred and attention-seeking. She flirts with other men because it gives her a boost or possibly even a power trip over their wives as they stand there watching. It’s pathetic, but unfortunately not uncommon.

I have three brothers and didn’t have my first female friend until I was ten, so I thoroughly missed out on key female socialisation. I find men incredibly easy to get along with and understand them quite well. I still manage to keep them at arm’s length and chat with their girlfriends/ wives. If I don’t they tend to get all bright-eyed and smiley around me, plus their partners tend to be more interesting than they are anyway. It’s not that she “just gets on better” with them, it’s intentional on her part.

"Girl's girl" is the most infantalising phrase. And you're definitely not a "girl's girl" when it comes to her, as it doesn't sound like she's actually doing anything wrong and yet you've taken against her quite strongly.

So she tries to be friendlier with men than women – maybe she has past (daddy) issues that make her want men's approval, maybe she's not good with women because she was bullied a lot growing up and has never got past it, maybe she respects men more because of internalised misogyny, or maybe the men are just friendlier to her. Who knows. None of those are particularly bad things for those around her, and neither do they mean she's not nice, any more than a woman would be 'not nice' for preferring female company and overlooking males.

So unless you think she's flirting and trying to seduce your husband, and he's vulnerable to having his head turned, why the dislike? It doesn't seem very "girl's girl" of you.

Follow your instincts, @Dogwalkinthedark

Always found it easier to talk to men all my life there not gossipy, usually enjoy proper chats, no bitchiness etc which I can't stand lol

There are definitely women out there who centre men and put a lot of weight on men’s approval - what get referred to as “pick-me girls”. These women are stuck in a teenage headspace and I just feel sorry for them, honestly. Naturally, men love them.

There are also women who are autistic and find conversation with men easier because it can be more direct and involve less emotional content.

I’m sure there are also women who connect with men more for other reasons that are legitimate to them. I always had a much closer relationship with my father, while my mother was not a very affectionate person, so for a long time men felt more safe and comfortable for me.

Whats with all these post lately, about women thinking their men are up to no good or another woman wants him, gut feelings about a woman that talks to your man, not every woman is a man eater.
This is MN known for slagging men off, yet the moment a woman says hi thats it, shes after him ffs.

Can we stop all this Bs and insecurities.

This is why i get on with men more, over the years women have got fucking worse, there ive said it.

Ignore the comments and focus on the vote which shows yanbu

Unfortunately at a basic level it often feels like women are subconsciously prioritising winning over/keeping a man. So very often its unspoken but there's an unmissable competitive undercurrent in many mixed group female dynamics

Ive seen the same among men: same undercurrent but their "thing" isnt women, their competitive focus will tend to be professional/lifestyle

No. I'm a people person. I'm respectful of every person, unless they are undeserving.
If my spirit warms to you, man or woman, we are fine. If it doesn't, I keep it moving.

Yeah.
"I'm a girl's girl and love women...but I'm sure this bitch is after my man"

I prefer women's company to men's 99% of the time in social situations, as I'm just more comfortable around women, and I still think this attitude is strange.

I know my female friends and I analyse peoples behaviour/ what they said /tone of voice etc not even in a bitchy way but on the whole we are more ‘analytic’ than our partners/men in my family, probably because we are people pleasers and the men just aren’t that deep. It sometimes makes it easier to speak to men. My best friends are women but casually I probably find men more approachable.

I wouldn’t take it too personally. I do know women like this. But I myself have to try harder with women than men as I was bullied by a group of girls at school and I dunno, it’s just stuck, so I’m very wary of women. I have loads of female friends now but I am naturally more comfortable with men who just seem less catty. Give her a chance, she might have a back story.

People are missing the point here. It doesn't really matter whether they like the term girls girl. Surely the bigger issue is this woman is rude and unpleasant?

If I don’t like one person in couple I’ll either ignore my dislike and speak to them both as normal OR I’ll ignore both of them.

Generally speaking is massively rude to ignore one person out of a couple/group of people.

Even if she was only like this with OP and friendly other women it would still giving mean girl energy. Because why treat someone like that?

I knew a woman like that once, when we were all our twenties. She was very pretty and very flirty, and looked downright repulsed when I (female) tried to chat to her. It was really striking, and my boyfriend said other women mentioned how different she was with men and women, and it annoyed them.
I broke up with the boyfriend and later encouraged him to ask her out because I was so sure she was interested, touching his stomach when she talked to him and looking at me as if I'd shat on her shoes if I joined the conversation. So he did, and she told him he was really special but she was with someone.
I never did work out why she behaved like that, but I believe you, OP.
Edited to add: I say that because PPs seem a bit hostile and inclined to tell you it's all in your head, or pick on your choice of phrase