to be annoyed about this situation with neighbour and her dog?

The dog being abandoned is why I reckon CF flew off to Benidorm with her friend, who posed as the relative in the unsatisfactory phone call.
Were she heading up to her dear old ailing Ma’s, and the family embrace, I think the dog would have been brought along too. 🕵🏻‍♀️

She is being completely unreasonable. I have lost a parent and while it is horrible, the world and your responsibilities do not stop.

You were extremely kind to take the dog in for the immediate few days and even more kind to find a kennel place for him.

Her dog is her responsibility whether she is grieving or not. She should consider herself lucky to get her dog back considering that she has effectively abandoned him not even responding to messages.

Well done for not being cruel to the dog such as tying it to the front door or locking inside her house like some PPs suggested. You ensured the dog was still in the care of kind people.

Shocking.
IMO, people like these and the OPs neighbour, don't look after their pets as they should either and dont deserve to have them.

Many posters are heartless and cruel. If it was a child they probably would have dumped it in a field or the local hospital.

It's just proof of what a nasty uncaring society we have become.

Poor dog, it's owners have disappeared. It has been pushed from pillar to post. It is probably now in the local pound waiting to be put down and it's owner doesn't know where it is and has been blocked from finding out.

Yet all of that it totally acceptable in the warped world of mumsnet. I think this thread is ripe for Facebook or a lurid red top newspaper.

This is definitely a possibility. After the shit this neighbour pulled I wouldnt be at all surprised if she'd invented the "mum emergency" to play on people's sympathy. Yes OP helped her book a fight, but still could be part of her calculated distraught.
The fact that she didnt even reply with payment details tells me she never wanted to pay for the dog's care. The texting "relative" could have easily arranged that, but again probably CF texting from another phone. This level of CF-ery is just monumental.

OMG do you think they were puppy mill dogs who had escaped 😢😢

Where were her puppies 😭😭😭

What do you think OP should have done? Cancelled her holiday?
Everyone's parents die. It is sad but life goes on. A lot of us have children, pets and/or other responsibilities that can't be ignored while we organise a funeral and deal with our grief.

OP tried to contact the CF on multiple occasions and CF was fully aware from the outset that OP was going on holiday. OP has been helpful and kind. Why should she prioritise someone else's dog over her holiday?

She is in Scotland. She went there on a plane. This means it is a long way from where she lives.

She is arranging her mother's funeral. This means she is upset and grieving. I dont know how long it takes to organise a funeral in Scotland. It is often 3 weeks in England. This means she could be in Scotland for 3 weeks.

It appears that the dog's owner has not got much money. At this time, she may not be able to retrieve the dog from the pound.

Yes, the owner should have got in touch and tried to make arrangements. Everyone on mumsnet would have easily have organised kennels from hundreds of miles away whilst in the middle of organising a funeral.

However, two wrongs do not make a right.

The vet scans the dog. They then have to check with the national data base, not their own records. The data base then releases the owners details. The vet may or may not check to see if the dog is a client.

Vets have hundreds of dogs and cats on their files. The dog is not a personal friend of the vets. Vets are neither a charity or a boarding kennels.

The vet will try to contact the owner. The vet will not keep the dog. It will go wherever local stray dogs go. After a certain amount of time it will be either pts or rehomed.

And a neighbour whose mother just DIED.

So?

Most people will lose their mum. Sad as it is it’s not unusual and must certainly not an excuse for animal neglect.

Apols if this is sarcasm though!

You’ve been kind and she’s massively taking advantage. Boarding kennels need dogs vaccination records, do you have them? They also require up to date kennel cough vaccines that need to be done at least 21 days before they arrive. Has your neighbour left this with you?

It can be 3 weeks between the death and the funeral up here too. That doesn’t mean she needs to be in Scotland for 3 weeks Much can be done remotely. It’s not 3 weeks of solid planning. In any event, tough shit. She still has a dog that’s her responsibility and no one else’ s and she’s still a CF

It is not sarcasm. It is pointing out that OP has no empathy and may well be the cause of her neighbor's dog being put down or adopted by someone else.

Any perceived lack of money and inability to use the internet or a phone is also not OP’s problem. As for your “two wrongs don’t make a right” OP hasn’t done anything wrong. I bet she’s fed the dog all week at her own expense. Just because some people are happy to be treated as doormats and risk being left out of pocket by some cheeky bastard because “grieving” doesn’t mean OP is wrong because she hasn’t. I’d have said no in the first place to having the dog so she’s already done a lot.

She does have empathy or else she wouldn’t have looked after the dog for nearly a week. The neighbour can resolve this matter easily and if the dog ends up PTS or rehomed it’s entirely on her.

Oh, for goodness' sake.

I'm an only child who had to organise my father's funeral whilst organising care for my mother and looking after my poorly husband. I recall driving to work whilst screaming in the car because that was somewhere where no one else could hear me.

During lockdown when I had to organise my husband's funeral I was on my own screaming at 4 walls in between liaising (from Scotland) with family members who chose not to travel from England during lockdown but wanted input into the webcast funeral so long as I did all the actual work.

The impact of the horror of that cannot be overstated, but you do what you have to do because it needs to be done. (That included dealing with Police Scotland, etc because my husband had the temerity to die at home instead of hospital.)

All that the neighbour whose mother had just DIED had to do was to reply to the OP's phone messages or get her friend/relative to reply properly instead of fobbing off the OP.

Still waiting on that heart transplant, I see.

So if you were in the OP'S shoes you'd cancel your holiday maxslice???

The OP helped for as long as she could and then did the right thing - she put the matter in the hands of the authorities.

LOL

The one I’ve got is perfectly fine, thanks. My empathy is for the OP who was very kind in an emergency and had that repaid by having the piss taken out of her. People on MN are always very generous with other people’s time and money. Having boundaries and not wanting to be walked over does not make someone heartless, no matter how much you might try and pretend you are a better person. That you needs to resort to insults says a lot about you.

I’ve known people with young kids and pets widowed in horrible circumstances who’ve had to still crack on with their lives. OP’s neighbour needs to do the same or face the consequences.

All of this.

You don't do it because you're superwoman - you do it because you bloody have to.

i am surprised the op's parents didnt take the dog.
seems a far fetched story even without that detail

I wouldn't take a random CF strangers dog in. Especially not when I was already dog sitting 2 other dogs. Completely out of the question.

Why should they? I wouldn’t have some random dog I’ve never met come to stay in my home!