Hi all, just spent an intense hour reading through your previous thread and nodding vigorously! Wow. So insightful. I am thinking about going back onto the apps even though I'm seeing a lovely guy but I am unsure if this will go anywhere. We are both divorced, met 2 years ago, first time on apps for both of us, first date, immediate connection, and we constantly congratulated ourselves for having struck gold on the first go.
The trouble is.. we were living together at mine in the early stage of our relationship which suited us both just fine. He was seeing his DC alternate weekends at the family home where the ex was living, but now the house has been sold and the ex has basically disappeared with her money (she got the bulk of the equity from the house, he's not left with a huge amount) he has moved into a rented property with the DCs. He's happy to be back in their lives and the situation is positive for all of them. They are adult age (youngest finishing A levels so tough time, oldest working). I've been, and am, totally supportive of all of them as much as possible, and my heart goes out to the DC and to him for the tricky situation they're in.
But. As I stand back from the situation, I realise that he won't talk about our future.. whether we have a future as anything more than long distance boyfriend/girlfriend? For reference he used to refer to me as a partner.. I still do, but heard him refer to me as girlfriend the other day and I felt a bit flat.
Ah sorry, I realise that the above is a thread in itself, but I think that you all are good at calling out cocklodging and avoidance strategies and I'm in my mid 50s, relatively stable financially with a nice flat and suddenly wondering whether I'm wasting my time hoping he'll want to move back in with me one day so we could resume the happy, carefree love fest that was our life last year. Just wondering if I've inadvertently been used.. feeling a bit taken for granted but dreading the thought that I'd have to make the call to end it, we do love each other but I want a relationship with a future and there might be someone else out there.. I just thought about having a quick look on bumble but immediately felt awful for even considering it!