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Relationships

Husband lied about Christmas party

233 replies

Dominique82 · 12/12/2019 16:29

We were having dinner out on Tuesday night, and I just asked him out of curiosity when is his work Christmas party, as I had not heard anything about it, and wasn’t too bothered to ask earlier. He answered that it looks like they are not having a Christmas party this year as a lot of people are working away or not in town. I did thing that’s quite odd not to have an office Christmas party, but wasn’t really questioning it.
It’s a small/medium newish office, around 30 people, quite international and he is the boss.
It would all be forgotten, except this morning I found a receipt in his jacket from a restaurant from Monday (so a day BEFORE he told me there was no Christmas party this year) for 23covers ‘Christmas deluxe menu’, cost over 2,5k,but the cost is completely irrelevant as that is obviously an expense that he will claim. So there is absolutely no doubt there WAS a Christmas party, which he lied to my face about.
Not only that, but he sent me a message on Monday afternoon asking what time am I going to be home as he needs to work late to finish off a presentation. He got home around 11pm, never mentioned a word about a Christmas party.
I am thinking WTF is this about??? It’s not like he cheated on me, but he lied twice, and made up a story about some imaginary work presentation. Am I overreacting ? I feel actually rather distressed. Could there be a justification to this?

OP posts:
pooopypants · 12/12/2019 16:33

None that I can think of but I don't know your DH. Is he prone to lying? Could he have mistaken what you said and / or gotten mixed up?


Seems like a really odd thing to lie about to me, it's hardly on par with having a massage or something sordid.


Have you caught him lying before?

LaurieFairyCake · 12/12/2019 16:33

Well I can't think of anything apart from he's angry with you or he's lied to cover up another lie (ie. cheating)

hellsbellsmelons · 12/12/2019 16:33

Until you mentioned the 'working late' and getting in at 11pm, I'd have said it was just lunch and not actually a party.
But to lie about it and actually make up some shite about a presentation is really off.
I'd be having words!!!!

Betterbegoing · 12/12/2019 16:34

That is very, very odd OP. Hes obviously done something very suspect, or he wouldn’t have made such a strange story up.

TheReluctantCountess · 12/12/2019 16:34

Maybe it wasn’t a Christmas party as such, but more of a meeting with food?

HowlsMovingBungalow · 12/12/2019 16:35

He is lying for a reason.

LL83 · 12/12/2019 16:35

Why has he lied? Would you normally attend Christmas party? If not then it is weird but in couldn't care. If you would normally go then it would effect trust.

Doyoumind · 12/12/2019 16:36

It's common to have a Christmas lunch that is separate from a Christmas party so I don't think he was necessarily lying about that. Did he think you would be annoyed at him being out late if it wasn't for work?

Dominique82 · 12/12/2019 16:36

Yes I have caught him lying before.
The receipt was printed just before 10pm, so it was a dinner Christmas party, so looks about right that he came home straight after.
Would you get angry about this? Or am I overreacting?

OP posts:
BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 12/12/2019 16:38

Yanbu at all to be pissed off at the barefaced lies. Especially as he has form.

What are you going to do about it?

Paddingtonthebear · 12/12/2019 16:38

Yes I would confront him. What possible reason would he have for lying to you (and he’s lied about two different parts of this story) unless he has something to hide?

Sorry OP it really doesn’t look good.

Doyoumind · 12/12/2019 16:38

Could it have been for clients rather than staff?

GrannyBags · 12/12/2019 16:38

I wouldn’t be angry but I would be asking a few questions

Loveablers · 12/12/2019 16:40

I’d be angry and upset! He’s obviously lying for a reason. My first thought would be ‘why doesn’t he want me there?’

BertrandRussell · 12/12/2019 16:40

I would be hurt and baffled. Ask him.

FruitcakeOfHate · 12/12/2019 16:40

I'd be fucking furious at the lying and confront him. Can't abide lying. He's doing it for a reason, too.

Loopytiles · 12/12/2019 16:40

What has he lied about before?

Affair, or potential for one. Or paying for the do himself and didn’t want you to know about the money?

Dominique82 · 12/12/2019 16:41

I agree with the poster who said he lied for a reason, I just cannot think what the reason could be?
He is out/ travelling with work all the time. I do get annoyed about this but would absolutely expect and understand a Christmas party. Also, I wouldn’t attend and he knows that 100%,so there was no reason for hiding it in order not to make me feel left out

OP posts:
Doyoumind · 12/12/2019 16:42

Just ask him then and judge his reaction.

happystory · 12/12/2019 16:42

That's really odd. Why would he lie? Most places have some sort of Christmas do...

HollowTalk · 12/12/2019 16:43

That is a really, really odd lie. What will you say to him?

litterbird · 12/12/2019 16:43

Have you considered that the Christmas party was just for colleagues and not spouses? Perhaps if that is the case he may not have wanted to make you feel un invited as it was cheaper to just keep it to colleagues only. Do you usually get invited to the party? I know some of my office bound friends have non spouse Christmas parties and just colleagues.

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madparrotlady12 · 12/12/2019 16:44

I would go apeshit ! I'd be thinking all sorts . Do you normally go on Christmas party's with him ? Zzz

marchingonwithmother · 12/12/2019 16:44

£110 quid a head? Shock

ReceptacleForTheRespectable · 12/12/2019 16:44

If it was a long Xmas lunch, would he have needed to stay late after to catch up on work?

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