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should I ask teacher for feedback on DD (age 2.9)

(7 Posts)
Hoppity Thu 01-Oct-09 13:52:04

DD1 just started formal pre-school (not really like nursery in the UK, quite a bit stricter and less child-centred, but anyhow. that's the system in the country where we live, so we are doing it.)

DD1 is 2.9, one second youngest in class, as pre-school starts the year one turns 3.

Anyway, after the first few days / two weeks of tears in the morning at drop off and at pick up, DD1 seems to be settling a little. (Although her behaviour outside school is much worse than it used to be, I out it down to tiredness and difficulty settling, different topic)

So, at pick up, the teacher does not give any feedback at all. Not even, "ah, X was a good boy, he sat quietly" or "Y seems tired today" or "Z is very chatty". She just hands the kids over to their carers and looks harrassed.

Would it be appropriate after 4 weeks now to ask for some feedback verbally or written (in the little exercise book that goes back and forth to school with notes from parent to teacher etc.) So far the exercise book has just warned us that there are kids with nits and that the school photographer is coming in. Nothing personalised from teacher about DD1 yet.

Should I hang fire?
Should I ask to see her?Don't want to get a name as pushy mother, but really woulod like to know if DDS1 is integrating or not, chatting or not, listening or not.

Bit lost. I am sure all mummies feel out of comfort zone first few weeks of school, this is exacerbated by foreign land / strange system.

Any ideas?

Orangutan Thu 01-Oct-09 14:11:35

You have evry right to know how your LO is settling in & what he gets up to during the day. Ask them!

Beeny1980 Thu 01-Oct-09 15:21:25

I would def ask. I get the same feedback from our pre-school teacher / helpers (my DD is about 5 weeks in) and i think unless you specifically ask the question, they will assume you don't want to know any more.
I would also ask the other mums of slightly older kids to find out about feedback as there may be a system already in place that you don't know about.
Don't worry about asking - as my Mum always says, if a question is not asked, it will never be answered. It's much better to have your worries / fears proven wrong than right by not asking the question.

Good luck


Allyinoz Fri 02-Oct-09 03:51:21

Tell the teacher you would like to make a time, that suits both of you, to talk about DD's progress. Then you are not just springing it on her.

acebaby Sun 04-Oct-09 19:20:08

I had a meeting with the teacher 3 weeks in (at my instigation). We just discussed how he had settled and ways I could support him at home (eg encouragement with using a knife and fork). I didn't ask her about ability etc because I didn't want to seem pushy.

I found it really helpful. So I'd go ahead and ask for a meeting

acebaby Sun 04-Oct-09 19:20:43

sorry should have said DS1 is 4.2 and in reception

piscesmoon Sun 04-Oct-09 19:24:51

I think it is perfectly reasonable to ask for a meeting.

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