Double standards on mn.

[thatwasme22]

This week so far:

1. I have seen various posters defend Caroline Flack for having issues. Maybe she did but then the same argument would not be made on Chris Browne.

1. A thread on the physical attractiveness on male politicians. Imagine a male forum did this on females.

1. A thread with a woman hiding her inheritance from her husband and encouraged to do so by many posters and him being called financially abusive for being sensible over money. When men do this on mn it's all ltb.

Am I missing something? I call myself a feminist so am pro equality and that's how I raised my kids but why is this not being called out on mn?

[JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows]

1. Did you see what Chris Brown did to Rihanna? I won't post a picture because it's very triggering. He also used this incident as material for songs and is far more famous than Caroline Flack ever was.

1. Lol you think there's no threads ever anywhere objectifying women? It doesn't happen here because the vast majority of posters are women - pop on Reddit if you want to see misogyny in action.

1. Women are disproportionately disadvantaged should a marriage break up. Due to being paid less, more likely to be part time and also highly likely to leave a marriage being the RP and no guarantee of child support due to the shitty CMS. It's not double standards, it's different because it's highly unlikely men need getaway money to ride them over

I'm a feminist, and it isn't about 'equality', it's about fighting to remove the oppression and hardships women face. Nowt to do with men. They can fight their own battles (heaven k own they don't fight ours)

[CuriousaboutSamphire]

What @JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows said. My feminism isn't based on equality either! When there is no sex based oppression anywhere in the world we can start to talk about equality.

Until then I will often support any underdog in ways I wouldn't support someone with the upper hand in any situation. And that support won't depend solely on their sex, skin colour, age, dis/ability etc.

[thatwasme22]

''1. Did you see what Chris Brown did to Rihanna? I won't post a picture because it's very triggering. He also used this incident as material for songs and is far more famous than Caroline Flack ever was.''

Not relevant on his fame, the point being that people defended her when it wouldn't be done to him. The extent of the beating again is another cop put- assault is assault.

''2. Lol you think there's no threads ever anywhere objectifying women? It doesn't happen here because the vast majority of posters are women - pop on Reddit if you want to see misogyny in action.''

Yes but this is not REDDIT, it is mn and a site where many posters go mad over men displaying such behavior yet do it themselves on the same site.

''3. Women are disproportionately disadvantaged should a marriage break up. Due to being paid less, more likely to be part time and also highly likely to leave a marriage being the RP and no guarantee of child support due to the shitty CMS. It's not double standards, it's different because it's highly unlikely men need getaway money to ride them over''

Again doesn't counteract every single case nor does it permit the ethos that money a man inherits is ''family money'' but when a woman inherits it's ''her money''.

[SmokedDuck]

I think you can be a feminist and interested in equality for women but also be against treating other people who are not women in ways that indicate a level of hypocrisy or total lack of self-awareness.

[thatwasme22]

''My feminism isn't based on equality either! When there is no sex based oppression anywhere in the world we can start to talk about equality.''

and so are you going to use this to tar all men?

[WiseOwlOne]

@JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows i agree with you.

Removing double standards means v little when we are living in a world where:
Women still earn less
Women are smaller than men
Men are the ones perpetrating violence against both sexes
Women are the ones who give birth and are subjected to all of the vulnerability that entails
Women end up with more responsibility for dc
So mothers end up trapped and dependent
Women are objectifed, assaulted, harrassed
Men can on the other hand walk away if they choose to and often they do
Men can reduce their maintenance by increasing their pension contributions.

So, so cslled double standards on a forum primarily for women is not a huge worry of mine.

[thatwasme22]

And so you are going to blame every single man for that>? Would you tolerate Muslim abuse on here because of the terrorist attacks being done primarily by Muslim extremists?

[HeyDemonsItsYaGirl]

Am I missing something?

Yes. The power balance between men and women is completely different. I struggle to see how you can be a feminist if you don't understand the issues women face...

[TeenMinusTests]

Different people post on different threads.
There isn't one MN mind or point of view.

[HeyDemonsItsYaGirl]

FFS I've fallen momentarily for another MRA thread. We seem to be having an invasion at the moment.

[JaneJeffer]

2. A thread on the physical attractiveness on male politicians.
Must have been a short thread.

[RUOKHon]

The double standards argument is a false equivalence and intellectually lazy. It’s the most tedious form of semantic hair-splitting.

It’s like saying black people can be racist against white people while completely ignoring who has the power, who is abusing it, and who created the structure within which that abuse of power occurs.

Women are systematically discriminated against in the workplace. Women are killed by men at a rate of one every three days for the last ten years. Baby girls are killed at birth for being the wrong sex. Female children are genitally mutilated. Women in too many countries around the world don’t have access to safe and legal abortion because of legislation made by men.

Where’s the equivalence there? There is none. So forgive me if I don’t care about men’s hurty feelings when they get called ugly on a female forum.

Men rating female politicians on their looks is an act of misogyny. Relatively, women rating male politicians on their looks is an act of subversion.

[Hailtomyteeth]

OP, you're defending men. But they're indefensible. Knowing the odd one who seems to be a reasonably decent sort doesn't mean the patriarchy has nothing to answer for.

Women need to stick together, not pull each other apart.

[CarolVordermansBum]

I remember an AIBU thread where 90% of females said if their partner would not preform oral sex they would LTB. But then in another thread started by a man because his wife wouldn't do it and he wanted advice, 90% of females agreed with his wife, said he was completely unreasonable and abusive for even asking, and most said they will not give oral themselves 🤣🤣


The double standards on here are laughable sometimes

[RufustheSniggeringReindeer]

@TeenMinusTests

Different people post on different threads.
There isn't one MN mind or point of view.

Yes, exactly

[Pumperthepumper]

Can’t add anything @JamesMiddletonsMarshmallows hasn’t said already. This thread is a bit try-hard isn’t it? Nobody actually believes men are suffering from a systemic and societal hatred of them anyway.

[RufustheSniggeringReindeer]

@CarolVordermansBum

I remember an AIBU thread where 90% of females said if their partner would not preform oral sex they would LTB. But then in another thread started by a man because his wife wouldn't do it and he wanted advice, 90% of females agreed with his wife, said he was completely unreasonable and abusive for even asking, and most said they will not give oral themselves 🤣🤣

The double standards on here are laughable sometimes

And that was exactly the same posters on both threads saying both things?

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

I agree with you, op.

[CuriousaboutSamphire]

@thatwasme22

''My feminism isn't based on equality either! When there is no sex based oppression anywhere in the world we can start to talk about equality.''

and so are you going to use this to tar all men?

Do you often do that?

Cherry pick a sentence that, when cropped from its context, seems to contradict the post as a whole!

It's not a good look, frankly!

[Thelnebriati]

When you see the same poster using double standards, call them out.

[RUOKHon]

I remember an AIBU thread where 90% of females said if their partner would not preform oral sex they would LTB. But then in another thread started by a man because his wife wouldn't do it and he wanted advice, 90% of females agreed with his wife, said he was completely unreasonable and abusive for even asking, and most said they will not give oral themselves

All that means is that there are two distinct populations within each sex who are not compatible with a partner who wants oral sex.

If one person wants oral sex and their partner doesn’t, it’s totally reasonable advice to tell them to leave abs seek a new relationship.

The flip side of that advice is that of course it would be totally unreasonable to force the unwilling partner to do oral sex.

I don’t get what you think is wrong in either of those examples.

[Chanjer]

Is it all the same people then?

I don't often see the people involved in discussions on feminism posting in the fittest Tory threads

Loads of people post here, lots come here for the lols and lots come here for interesting debate. I don't think there's a great big crossover

[CarolVordermansBum]

I don’t get what you think is wrong in either of those examples

It was literally the same people saying no oral, no relationship, who will not give oral sex. How can you not see the double standard.

[Pumperthepumper]

@CarolVordermansBum

*I don’t get what you think is wrong in either of those examples*

It was literally the same people saying no oral, no relationship, who will not give oral sex. How can you not see the double standard.

It was the same people on both threads? That’s unusual.

[CuriousaboutSamphire]

It was literally the same people saying no oral, Was it? I think we needs links to see who those posters were!