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AIBU?

Text found on husbands phone

338 replies

roseyposeypuddingandpie · 20/07/2019 01:10

Him: Can you do lunch next week?
Her: Yes I can do Monday.
Him: Just remember, you are brave and strong, life is a daily battle that you’re winning, Every day gets easier I'm telling you!!! You are beautiful kind, intelligent and hard working, nothing else matters
Oh and you have a good looking boss.
Xxx

What would you think?

OP posts:

Report

KurriKawari · 20/07/2019 01:12

Flirting, wanting more than a working relationship. Highly inappropriate if he is her boss.

SerenaOverjoyed · 20/07/2019 01:13

Really inappropriate. Hard to say if anything has happened but he clearly is persuing her.

Sorry

WonderWorm · 20/07/2019 01:13

Totally imnapropriate unless he talks to everyone male and female like this.
People need strong boundaries.

roseyposeypuddingandpie · 20/07/2019 01:15

We've just had an almighty row- I confronted him as I was really upset. He says I'm an immature c*nt and she's been having problems so his just being a kid friend to her. He says I'm pathetic.

OP posts:

roseyposeypuddingandpie · 20/07/2019 01:15

Kind not kid

OP posts:

Peakypolly · 20/07/2019 01:16

I’d say “you know this woman you are meeting for lunch on Monday? Can you introduce me to her boss if he is such a hunk”
Seriously, it sounds inappropriate and I would be pointing that out to my DH.

CCC1 · 20/07/2019 01:16

All of the wrongs. Too friendly and entirely inappropriate for a male manager to send to a female employee. I think you know this though. I’m sorry.

Rystall · 20/07/2019 01:17

Without any other context it looks like a text to someone going through a really shitty time. Is someone on his team out on sick leave for treatment?? I don’t see it as that flirtatious on its own? The ‘xx’ is a bit weird though but lots of people put xx on texts now.

However, context is everything.

findingmyfeet12 · 20/07/2019 01:18

He is interested in taking it further with her.

It's flirtatious and inappropriate.

Rystall · 20/07/2019 01:18

However being called a c*nt and pathetic counts as context.........

BrokenLogs · 20/07/2019 01:18

No boss puts kisses on texts, that's massively unprofessional.

I'm sorry OP, definitely having an affair/EA. And the fact he got so defensive

JaneJeffer · 20/07/2019 01:20

So she is beautiful kind, intelligent and hard working and you his wife are an immature c*nt?
Not very nice is it?

QueenAnneBoleyn · 20/07/2019 01:21

Flirtatious and totally inappropriate.
Calling you a c*nt and pathetic?!! I’d be rethinking the relationship. Sorry OP.

WhereYouLeftIt · 20/07/2019 01:24

"Oh and you have a good looking boss."
So this is to someone who works for him? Hugely inappropriate given the power imbalance.

"He says I'm an immature c*nt and she's been having problems so his just being a kind friend to her."
Someone here is being a cunt and it's not you.

StarGOLD · 20/07/2019 01:35

Oh dear you’ve rumbled him. If it was innocent why fly off the handle and use such vile language to you. Totally inappropriate exchange between boss and colleague. Sorry.

SuperSara · 20/07/2019 01:35

Could be innocent enough, I suppose.

Absolutely out of order calling you a cunt, though.

Why were you going through his phone @roseyposeypuddingandpie ?

TwistyTop · 20/07/2019 01:36

Sounds like the physical affair hasn't started yet, but he is pushing hard for it.

WomanLikeMeLM · 20/07/2019 01:38

What a disgusting man speaking to you like that. Kick him out until he learns to respect you.

HennyPennyHorror · 20/07/2019 01:39

The only boss I've had who spoke to me in a similar way also bought me a watch out of the blue....went in for the kill on a work's night out and I was horrified!

daisyboocantoo · 20/07/2019 01:39

If the text didn't contain the part about her being beautiful and him being good looking, it would be supportive and I wouldn't bat an eyelid.

As it stands, I would eat my hat if he isn't testing the waters for an affair.

And that's before his reaction and name calling.

roseyposeypuddingandpie · 20/07/2019 01:45

Apparently I'm pathetic, immature for being upset so he's done with our relationship. (He's said this many times before)

I said I'm upset because I love him and feel disrespected, he says it would be easier if I didn't love him.

He says I'm twisting things and he can write whatever he wants to whoever he wants and I should just grow up and trust him.

I said that he's disrespecting me and our marriage, his response- 'Fuck off and grow up.'

OP posts:

roseyposeypuddingandpie · 20/07/2019 01:46

It's not the first time I've found messages like this to female employees. He says it's just the way he speaks to them. I feel it's out of line.

OP posts:

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Flopt · 20/07/2019 01:47

Bastard .

QuickThinkOfAName · 20/07/2019 01:48

Sorry op. It's massively inappropriate but his response to you is worse.

How long has this been going on?
Does he always speak to you like this?

Flopt · 20/07/2019 01:48

Text her and ask her if he’s been sexually harassing her

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