Advanced search

Is it U to wear this as a wedding guest?

(342 Posts)
GetSetNo Thu 02-May-19 21:27:35

I've asked a couple of people now, it's about an inch of the floor at the back if I'm wearing flats which I intend to later on or with heels, 4/5 inches.

Everyone I've asked (6 people) says it's fine and I should definitely wear it but if I were the bride, I feel as though I'd think whoever wore it was trying to steal the limelight (although, you can never truly upstage a bride).

Is everyone else BU here?

Treaclesweet Thu 02-May-19 21:29:04

If you think that why would you wear it?

EdWinchester Thu 02-May-19 21:30:07

It's very horrible. So yes.

BlueJava Thu 02-May-19 21:30:17

It's really lovely, but I wouldn't wear it to a wedding. I think the skirt looks like you're trying to upstage the bride or bridesmaids. That's just my opinion but perhaps you'd feel uncomfortable wearing it otherwise you'd have just worn it.

lastqueenofscotland Thu 02-May-19 21:30:41

If you think it don’t wear it

Nicknacky Thu 02-May-19 21:30:50

It’s a nice dress but really not nice enough to upstage the bride!

Huskylover1 Thu 02-May-19 21:31:02

I like it. I thought you were going to post a pic of a white dress. It's lovely.

Yabadabadont Thu 02-May-19 21:31:26

Why ask if that’s how you already feel?confused

Biancadelrioisback Thu 02-May-19 21:32:29

How on earth would that compete with a wedding dress?? Eh????

Dishwashersaurous Thu 02-May-19 21:32:49

Err it’s not a massive white meringue. It’s a floral dress.

The vast majority of female guests will be wearing floral dresses.

I don’t see any concern or upstaging at all. In what possible way is it upstaging? There’s no nudity, it’s not white or black or pvc?

DramaAlpaca Thu 02-May-19 21:32:51

It's not a particularly nice dress. And if you even think it might upstage the bride then you shouldn't wear it.

mimibunz Thu 02-May-19 21:33:01

I think it’s an awful style so I wouldn’t wear it.

Redshoeblueshoe Thu 02-May-19 21:33:09

I think it's lovely and perfectly suitable for a wedding

countdowntonap Thu 02-May-19 21:33:11

I suppose it depends what the bride looks like, but I’d be pretty gutted if that could upstage me! Not something I’d chose to wear myself.

Famalamaringwrong Thu 02-May-19 21:33:22

I think it's awful and unflattering and would look terrible with flats on. Dont do it send it back. I promise I'm not being rude or mean I am giving my genuine answer.

SuperheroBirds Thu 02-May-19 21:33:34

I think it is lovely and you could wear it. But, you should wear what you feel comfortable in, if you are going to worry all day, pick something else.

Sexnotgender Thu 02-May-19 21:33:59

I certainly wouldn’t worry about upstaging the bride in that.

puppylovebaby Thu 02-May-19 21:34:19

It's awful! Sorry.

Twotome Thu 02-May-19 21:34:42

Agree - horrible dress. I don’t think that would upstage the bride at all.

Disfordarkchocolate Thu 02-May-19 21:35:16

I think it's fine but it would look better if the back was about 6 inches shorter. Nothing that would upstage the bride.

Hermagsjesty Thu 02-May-19 21:35:17

I definitely don’t think it would upstage the bride. It looks like a fairly standard wedding guest dress to me (in a nice way - I do like it)

GetSetNo Thu 02-May-19 21:35:26

Personally, I love it. I just wondered if some norms have changed? Is it wedding appropriate?

It definitely can't compete with a wedding dress! The bride is beautiful and she's going to look gorgeous but it does look a tad like a train and I don't want to be THAT person. Every wedding I've been to there has been someone who has 1) worn white or, 2) worn something completely outrageous that everyone was talking about it.

lostfrequencies Thu 02-May-19 21:36:44

It's not to my taste at all, I think it's really ugly. Not sure how it would look like an attempt to upstage the bride!

HollyGoLoudly1 Thu 02-May-19 21:37:04

Another one who thought it was going to be a pic of a white dress! I actually quite like it and I don't think at all that it's going to upstage a bride or bridesmaids. I don't understand why anyone thinks that to be honest - because it has a high-low hem? It's just a standard wedding guest dress imo.

Chickenwing Thu 02-May-19 21:37:07

Agree with most pp... it would be impossible to upstage a bride in this monstrosity confused

CalmdownJanet Thu 02-May-19 21:37:21

How the actual fuck could anyone think that would upstage a bride or a bridesmaid?? That's ridiculous!! It looks nothing like either confused

eightoclock Thu 02-May-19 21:37:30

Looks like a standard wedding guest dress. Don't know what you are worrying about! Virtually all the other female guests will be wearing similar although the hemline is a bit unusual, it's not mad enough to stand out in the sea of other flowery dresses

Dishwashersaurous Thu 02-May-19 21:37:40

Of course it’s not a train. Don’t be ridiculous

MatchSetPoint Thu 02-May-19 21:37:41

I dislike the dress but each to their own, you would be fine wearing it to a wedding, definitely won’t upstage the bride.

chaoscategorised Thu 02-May-19 21:38:23

I don't like it, but I don't think it looks remotely bridal/bridesmaidy. So you'll be fine!

Cailinnua Thu 02-May-19 21:38:54

If you love the dress, wear it. It doesn’t look anything like a train and people will not think you are trying to upstage the bride. If it is a big wedding you probably won’t even be the only person wearing that style.

CalmdownJanet Thu 02-May-19 21:39:09

Well that's not white or outrageous, it's fine, wear it. I work with weddings, about 50 a year and it's pretty bog standard attire (not meant in a bad way, but nobody is going to bat an eyelid!)

Jojo19834 Thu 02-May-19 21:39:14

I like it, and don’t think it’s a problem, however it’s good advice that if you are already worrying it will probably be an issue for you on the day

Ghanagirl Thu 02-May-19 21:39:35

It’s lovely if you’re slim definitely wear it, it’s not bridal looking at all.

jcq17 Thu 02-May-19 21:40:00

It's not the best but it certainly wouldn't upstage the bride. If you want to wear it go for it.

HBStowe Thu 02-May-19 21:40:34

Why would it upstage the bride? It’s just a normal dress! I think you will be fine OP!

LazyLemur Thu 02-May-19 21:40:44

Whether someone else here loves it or hates it is irrelevant. You won't be upstaging the bride in that.

Would you mind if someone wore it to your wedding? I wouldn't mind if you wore it to mine.

Famalamaringwrong Thu 02-May-19 21:40:52

@Ghanagirl what the fuck has size goto do with it?! Also that's a shitty thing to say since the link clearly says it's a "curve" dress.

ImogenTubbs Thu 02-May-19 21:40:58

If you're worried, ask the bride!

Biancadelrioisback Thu 02-May-19 21:42:01

You sound quite self absorbed if you think that anyone will be gossiping about you in that dress. It's very wedding guest typical. Sorry I'm not trying to be mean but honestly, I'm utterly baffled to see how you could ever think that? I've worked as a wedding manager for over 10 years and I've seen hundreds of wedding guest outfits, this is so middle of the pack.

JE87 Thu 02-May-19 21:42:23

Looks like a normal dress people would wear to a wedding to me. Don't see why it would upstage the bride!

Tavannach Thu 02-May-19 21:42:59

I don't like it, sorry. It's not really appropriate for a wedding unless it's a right old knees up.

GetSetNo Thu 02-May-19 21:43:40

Great, I'll be wearing this monstrosity then grin

And to the pp who said wear it if I'm slim, I'm not and you know that because it's the curve range. However, it looks fucking fantastic on my figure.

Bluntness100 Thu 02-May-19 21:44:04

To be fair I understand what the op is saying, it's not that it will upstage the bride, more people will thinks she's trying to , because effectively it's got a train at the back.

And I think it's a bit over the top if I'm honest op, unless it's a hugely high end wedding.

Tavannach Thu 02-May-19 21:45:07

Upstaging the bride isn't only about white, it's about dressing in such a way that the bride looks outstanding and gets all the attention.

Ofalltheginjoints Thu 02-May-19 21:45:11

I wore the same style dress to a wedding a couple of weeks ago it was a more floaty material then that dress appears to be, can confirm that at no point did anyone think I was the bride or a member of the wedding party.

If you love it and feel good in it wear it OP

Bookworm4 Thu 02-May-19 21:45:54

I think dropped hems are awful, would look nicer if it was the same knee length all round. Do not wear flats.

Overtheborder Thu 02-May-19 21:46:00

@ghanagirl- it's lovely if you're slim.... wtf?

How has size anything to do with it?

mimibunz Thu 02-May-19 21:47:06

It’s a mullet dress.

Bookworm4 Thu 02-May-19 21:47:53

Not every style suits every figure, it's a valid point. Some styles flatter different shapes, heights. It's not offensive.

Eustasiavye Thu 02-May-19 21:48:05

That's fine to wear.
To be fair I never hear anyone say to a man don't wear that outfit, people might confuse you with the groom. Yet often you can't tell who the groom is.

7salmonswimming Thu 02-May-19 21:48:53

You’re worried about upstaging the bride/bridesmaids because it’s “look at me”. And not in a good way. It looks like something that the pissed girls at Ladies’ Day at the races would wear. It’s tacky. With an even length hem all the way round, above or below the knee, it’s just a regular floral dress with a modest neckline. The raised hemline at the front says you want to show some flesh. At a wedding.

Tacky. Sorry.

Cinnemom Thu 02-May-19 21:52:30

It’s a ghastly dress. It’s not even nice on the model

MirriVan Thu 02-May-19 21:52:32

Well obviously, the issue is not that it's a bridal colour or a bridesmaid style, but that it's a quite attention grabbing style.
It's one of those odd ones where I'd feel self-conscious and worried wearing it, but I wouldn't judge someone else for doing so.

DocusDiplo Thu 02-May-19 21:53:30

Aw, I like the dress!

Riddikulusness Thu 02-May-19 21:53:40

You’ll neither upstage the bride nor look as if you’re trying to. You’ll blend in.

marvellousnightforamooncup Thu 02-May-19 21:53:49

It's fine. If you like it, wear it.

NataliaOsipova Thu 02-May-19 21:54:18

If the dress were all one length it would be lovely. As it is, it looks rather odd and is extremely unflattering on that model!

Abcd3 Thu 02-May-19 21:54:57

Would you still like the dress if it were not as long at the back? If so, you could get it shortened at the back if you would feel more comfortable with that look. (The back could still be longer than the front, if you prefer it that way, just not as long as it is now.) I don’t think you would be upstaging the bride with the way it is, though.

bridgetreilly Thu 02-May-19 21:55:24

It's appropriate for a black tie evening event, but I would not wear that to a day wedding.

Pret Thu 02-May-19 21:55:59

Lol at mullet dress.

Have you got a giant toilet roll to sit on?

Juanaiguana Thu 02-May-19 21:56:08

Blimey love, it’s not that nice a dress!
Passable yes but I certainly wouldn’t be worried about upstaging the bride or even the bridesmaids frankly

MirriVan Thu 02-May-19 21:56:16


That's IT!
It's a bit 'Ladies Day at Aintree'.
Personally, I'd veer more towards 'Royals at Goodwood' for a wedding, but I'm quite dull grin

pissedonatrain Thu 02-May-19 21:56:35

It's fine.

lboogy Thu 02-May-19 21:56:45

I love it and there's no way it would upstage the bride

StillCoughingandLaughing Thu 02-May-19 21:57:08

Everyone I've asked (6 people) says it's fine and I should definitely wear it but if I were the bride, I feel as though I'd think whoever wore it was trying to steal the limelight (although, you can never truly upstage a bride).

This sounds deranged.

BattenburgIsland Thu 02-May-19 21:57:13

I think it's fine. It's not to my taste but that's not to say it doesnt suit you and I dont think its utterly hideous or anything. I'm sure it will be one of many floral dresses wedding guests are wearing and wouldn't attract attention at all... certainly I cant see any scenario where it would be taking attention from the bride!

coral13 Thu 02-May-19 21:57:21

I think you'd look lovely and I don't think it's an issue for a wedding at all.

To be apart from the hem it's quite a typical wedding guest dress. The hem is nice and unusual but that doesn't mean it will look like you're standing out too much.

Springisallaround Thu 02-May-19 21:57:46

I like it and it looks way nicer than most of the dresses everyone gushes about over in Style and Beauty when people post then saying shall I wear this one!

Dresses are about colouring and confidence, if you look good in it, wear it. It's not remotely bridal and neither is it 'out there' for a wedding! Weddings are full of young fun people as well as older relatives, I've seen full length evening type dresses, minis, lots of legs on show, backless, summer weddings aren't full of people in navy shift dresses, whatever the more conservative members of MN may have you believe.

blue55 Thu 02-May-19 21:58:11

How would it be stealing the limelight? It's just a dress

Jamsangwich Thu 02-May-19 21:58:32

Could you have a dressmaker make the skirt the same length all round, if the "train" bit of it is concerning you? I think it would be very pretty.

coral13 Thu 02-May-19 21:58:42

Also re flats, most weddings I've been to nearly everyone ends up barefoot at the end of the night so I'd ignore the comments re flat shoes!

Ghanagirl Thu 02-May-19 22:00:27


Dippypippy1980 Thu 02-May-19 22:00:43

You have amazing self confidence - i assume you are stunning and would therefore upstage the bride in any dress.

In my humble opinion it’s not a particularly nice dress - but I certainly wouldn’t have an issue with any of my guests wearing it.

I assume the bride knows you are very attractive, but she has invited you anyway - so wear what makes you comfortable and enjoy the day.

FannyWork Thu 02-May-19 22:02:56

I think that’s fine with a cardigan. But if it would make you feel uncomfortable don’t wear it coz you’ll just feel paranoid all day.

Honeyroar Thu 02-May-19 22:03:22

Do you have a picture of it side on? It's a very strange style, it just seems strange looking at the underside of the back of the skirt. It won't upstage the wedding party, but it might get people talking - the comments on here clearly show it's a bit marmite!

Ineedamanipedi Thu 02-May-19 22:03:51

I’m getting married in a couple of weeks and although I don’t think I’d be annoyed as such if a guest wore this I would probably think it’s an odd choice.

Ghanagirl Thu 02-May-19 22:04:12

Again sorry, I just thought it’s a beautiful dress☹️

LuluJakey1 Thu 02-May-19 22:05:07

It won't upstage anyone else's outfit.

cuppycakey Thu 02-May-19 22:05:52

It's horrible.

Springwalk Thu 02-May-19 22:06:17

I don't think there is any chance you will upstage the bride op, really no chance unless there is a halloween theme.

goldenchicken Thu 02-May-19 22:06:42

It would be a lot nicer, if the long 'train' was chopped off, and it was just knee length.

Pretty pattern and all.

As it is though, it's not very nice IMO.

Penny2000 Thu 02-May-19 22:07:04

I think it is a lovely dress for a wedding guest and perfect for a curvy figure.

Harebel Thu 02-May-19 22:07:43

Not to my taste at all but if you like it wear it, unless you go to some odd weddings where people comment on others outfits I'd not be worrying about upstaging either bride, bridesmaids or other guests in that dress.

To the PP who said you can only wear it if you're slim, lol that's ridiculous!

Sb74 Thu 02-May-19 22:07:57

As always, full of unnecessary nasty comments from posters. Are you like this is real life?? Op, I think the dress looks nice. It’s is quite unusual so it might get some attention. To be on the safe side maybe go with something more standard.

jonsnowlowblow Thu 02-May-19 22:11:41

If it's not wedding appropriate, where else would you bloody wear that thing?!

Absofrigginlootly Thu 02-May-19 22:13:14

Wow people are being really rude and nasty in this thread. There’s just no need for it. Does it make you feel good to tear other people and their choices/taste down?
People have different tastes and something that I would love I’m sure someone else would think was awful but why would you ever say something to them if they like it?

OP ignore all the posters being catty and rude just for the sake of it. I think it’s a typical wedding guest sort of dress. I don’t think the dropped hem looks like a wedding train and the fabric isn’t “bridal” so no worries there.

If you feel good in it wear it and have a lovely time wine

cheercaptain Thu 02-May-19 22:15:58

If you would feel that way as a bride, then do not wear the dress however I am certain that no one, including the bride, would feel upstaged by this dress. What is it about this dress that you like? I dislike everything about it but each to their own. Chi Chi do that style all the time so you may have other guests in similar style too.

Absofrigginlootly Thu 02-May-19 22:16:23

Just had another look. I actually really like it! So if that means I have no taste too I don’t care, what other people think doesn’t concern me, I have my own sense of style grin

Alarae Thu 02-May-19 22:17:53

I have a Chi Chi dress in that shape but in a different pattern.

I wore it to a wedding last year and I can safely say no one believed I was part of the wedding party! Mine even had a deep v on the back. Racy.

EauDeReality Thu 02-May-19 22:21:38

I quite like it. Wouldn't wear it myself but if it's your style, wear it. Nobody expects guests to dress like Coast is the only shop in the world do they?

Crystalblue13 Thu 02-May-19 22:21:55

I think it’s nice and fine to wear for a wedding. If you feel good in it wear it smile

GetSetNo Thu 02-May-19 22:23:04

Oh FFS, I mean I don't want talk to be "look at GetSetNo trying so hard/looking like she wants to be a bridesmaid". Next you will tell me I'm too worried about people's opinions. It'll either be I think too much of myself or too little, I can't win. I truly wonder if these MNetters with the unnecessarily rude comments are the same who are horrified about online bullying. I take it with a pinch of salt but the next person may not.

As I said, of course you can't upstage the bride. It's not too dressy, it's just the back I wondered about.

Hohofortherobbers Thu 02-May-19 22:24:26

I like it, but do not wear with flats

Alsohuman Thu 02-May-19 22:26:55

Nobody ever used to worry about this stuff. You chose a nice outfit you liked and that was it. No bride ever is upstaged. She’s the radiant, glowing one with her back to the congregation.

JustCallMeSliths Thu 02-May-19 22:27:22

If you're worried about getting too much attention then don't wear it.

ThumbWitchesAbroad Thu 02-May-19 22:27:47

If it's not actually trailing on the floor then it won't look that much like a train - so wear it with heels.

It's a very common style in Australia, loads of people wear dresses like this to all occasions - not that that helps you necessarily if you're in the UK! - so as long as you're comfortable with it, wear it.

Biancadelrioisback Thu 02-May-19 22:28:13

I have no issue with dip hem or high-low hems. I quite like them actually! This is just not a nice colour, the shorter part of the hem is too short, the longer side is too long and the neckline doesn't suit the rest of the dress. It's hardly a train and quite a common style of dress. There will more than likely be several others with a similar hemline.

Ivgotasecretcanyoukeepit Thu 02-May-19 22:29:40

No it won’t upstage the bride but those High/Low hemlines are rather cheap looking.

SinisterBumFacedCat Thu 02-May-19 22:30:09

I don’t think you have to worry about upstaging the bride, unless you’re wearing white! It’s up to you, tbh I like it without the train, I imagine looking back in a couple of years on the photos it’ll look a bit dated.

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »