To be furious the teacher told my ten year old she stinks?

[madsymads]

Family meal yesterday at an Indian restaurant. Might have been a bit heavy on garlic and spices.

DD was quiet when I picked her up today (she had been to after school club) and then suddenly started crying. I of course asked what was wrong and she said that this morning she had gone up to her teachers desk to ask something and the teacher (DD demonstrated) pulled a face and said 'ew, go and sit down, get away from me. What have you eaten? It smells awful.'

Obviously this led to quite a lot of unkind comments all day.

Completely inappropriate. Or AIBU?

[Katy07]

Wow!
Completely inappropriate.

[Ineededtonamechange]

Wow. Really? I'd be fuming if teacher actually said that. Not kind, or helpful.

Obviously check with the teacher but I'd be expressing disapproval, just unnecessary!

[Ibelieve123]

That is awful op. I would be so cross How can a teacher embarrass a young pupil like that.
I would be wanting an explanation & an apology for my dd
Yanbu

[madsymads]

I'll definitely check (I don't leap to my child's defence and I support teachers) but I feel this is the truth.

[SemiNormal]

That's awful, definitely needs questioning the teacher about. Your poor DD.

[Bobsmum02]

So inappropriate and feeding bullying within the class. I would be fuming!

[Bakedappleflavour]

If that's true it's fucking horrible.

[Boiing]

I woud be livid. Tell the head to teach to teacher some professionalism / suggest teacher has some anti bullying training.

[sj257]

That's really mean! 😔

[peachesandcreamdream]

Is the teacher normally like this?

If not, I'd suggest a quiet word rather than accusing them of full scale bullying.

That said, it wasn't a nice thing to say.

ps I feel for your daughter - I really carry garlic when I eat anything containing it

[EweAreHere]

Any professional teacher would know that this would create problems for a student if s/he made such a statement out loud in front of a class/other students like this.

A quiet word should have been had. I would formally ask her what she said and, if it looks like this did indeed happen, have a word with her head of department.

[SapphireStrange]

(assuming your DD has it right)

Unacceptable.

[SuburbanRhonda]

So she didn't actually say that your child stinks?

She said whatever she's eaten smelled awful.

Both unacceptable of course, but I'm wondering why your title says something that didn't happen.

[Jayfee]

I just spent an hour with a very smelly student. someshong she had eaten I think. but i wouldnt dream of commenting. but to be honest i would try and use it to help your daughter realise how thoughtless some people can be..even teachers. if it happened again i would have a word with the teacher.

[madsymads]

No, sorry Surburban I'm not buying that.

Do you think eleven and ten year olds will see it like that?

[mellowfartfulness]

I think the distinction between "you stink" and "what you've eaten stinks" is subtle enough to make no difference to the poor kid on the receiving end of such comments in front of their whole class.

[Olympiathequeen]

Just have a quiet word with the teacher and explain how upset your DD was. It was very unkind.

[Jayfee]

i just wish all the mums who think teachers should be superhuman had to spend a year teaching. i love teaching and am a good teacher but dont always get everything right. at the moment too many good teachers are leaving teaching and those left need support rather than judgement. of course op is rght in wanting to support her child, but anti bullying training for the teacher..really????

[SapphireStrange]

I'm an adult and the distinction between 'you stink' and 'whatever she's eaten smelled awful' is too subtle for me, to be honest.

They're both very capable of making a person feel crap.

[Sara107]

Really unkind, and unprofessional. There was no need to mention the smell. I would take it up with the school, as it clearly upset the child.

[Cagliostro]

Really crass comment :( poor DD

[Ohdearducks]

Rude behaviour in any context or situation, there was absolutely no need for that and the fact it lead to your child being picked on throughout the day is awful. I'd be furious if I was you. Definitely approach the teacher and make it very clear how hurt your DD was by her comments and that it lead to hurtful comments from other children. If the teacher is not completely mortified and forthcoming with a sincere apology than go to the parent liaison person and make a complaint about her humilating treatment of your child.

[madsymads]

Jayfee I do not expect you to get everything right, but do not act as if you are the victim here.

The victim is a little girl who did nothing wrong, nothing disrespectful, nothing nasty. She went to talk to her teacher.

[RichardBucket]

Very inappropriate. I work with adults who sometimes smell (BO, bad breath, garlic, whatever), am not "superhuman" and I manage to keep my thoughts to myself. Anyone working with children should be extra careful.

If this teacher didn't realise what she'd done and apologise, she could definitely do with some anti-bullying training.

Jayfee Stop whining.

[IminaPickle]

Jayfee
Not making flippant throw away comments about children is pretty basic emotional literacy let alone pretty much a pre requisite for being a teacher. If a teacher doesn't get this, then yes, they need anti bullying training.
Also if you are a teacher, posting on a forum read by parents, either don't announce it or proof read. Again basic emotional literacy and professional pride.
HTH