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AIBU?

Dickhead threatening to burn my hair!!

312 replies

ClockworkAngel · 07/02/2015 04:34

I have just got in from an otherwise good night out. Rarely I have a child free night so I went out with a good friend for her birthday.
I was having a brilliant time but she had invited some friends of hers. All of them are lovely but one. I disliked him from the start. He kept criticising me. For instance he kept calling me boring because I wasn't drinking alcohol but kept on and on all night about it, telling me I needed to 'cheer up and smile' and 'get a few more drinks down and loosen up'. Really fucking annoying.
Towards the end of the night, waiting for taxis, I ended up talking to an old friend I happened to bump into and as my back was turned, this guy took a lighter out his pocket and threatened the others he would burn my hair. He lit the lighter and held it up really close to my hair.
I couldn't get over what this guy had done but everyone else said I was overreacting and that it's 'only hair'. But that isn' t the point is it? If he had threatened to burn my skin everyone would be up in arms but why is it any different because it's my hair?
Am I overreacting? It happened over and hour ago and I'm still thinking about it. Do I need to get a grip?
I think my problem is that I just cannot get over how fucking thick some people can be. Doesn't take a genius to work out that burning someone's hair or whatever is potentially dangerous.
TIA

OP posts:

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LeotheLioness · 07/02/2015 04:41

I don't think you are overreacting. I would have decked him!

Nightingalemumoftwo · 07/02/2015 04:44

YANBU! What a moron he is, probably thought he was being a right "character" for almost setting fire to your hair.
What a thick idiot he sounds like !!! OP, hope you can relax safe in the knowledge that it's not you but others acting totally insensitively to say the least.
Why didn't your friends stick up for you?
Hugs x

PedantMarina · 07/02/2015 04:50

That's assault (or threat of), and no, its not "just hair". You're right: it's potentially very dangerous.

Please consider ringing the police (101, unless you're still in any danger).

Chottie · 07/02/2015 05:08

That is awful. I would really furious too, was he drunk, or is he always so stupid?

Oldmanriver · 07/02/2015 05:09

That is appealing behavior. The fact that these 'friends' didn't rein him in from crossing an obvious line tells you enough about both him and them.

vinegarandbrownpaper · 07/02/2015 05:27

Man what a prick. I was very satisfied when I saw a similar type of prick get thrown to the floor and kicked out by security for holding lighters on the leggings of girls. With hair, hairspray and product can make it really flammable. Ok he might have been a good guy being an arse.. but he sounds more like an arse being a dangerous arse.

FoxgloveFairy · 07/02/2015 06:11

To be honest, sounds like you need new friends. If they think it's okay to threaten to set fire to your hair, as it's "only hair" , they are well, not really friends are they? Would they be okay with that? Doubt it very much. It isn't a joke. Something like that can lead to horrendous consequences.

HSMMaCM · 07/02/2015 06:15

He's an idiot and they are not your friends.

RandomNPC · 07/02/2015 06:18

You're certainly not overreacting. Have you got any male family/friends that could have a 'word' with him? What a prick.

Sunnysideup5883 · 07/02/2015 06:26

Can you tell your friend (in the hope it gets back) that if the bully did actually burn your hair you would have reported him the incident to the police. It's totally unacceptable.

Sunnysideup5883 · 07/02/2015 06:26

But I suspect the police would be pointless.

FoxgloveFairy · 07/02/2015 06:34

Have to say, Random, Mr. Fox would be wanting a word!Reinforced with a rather large fist if left to his own devices.

nunkspugget · 07/02/2015 06:35

What a knob. Your 'friends' sound like spineless sheep who enable this arsehole. Ditch them all.

RandomNPC · 07/02/2015 06:39

If it was my GF, Foxglove, I'd want a serious word too!

Velocitractor · 07/02/2015 06:46

Agree with what pp said. Plus it's irrelevant if it's hair, skin or even just a scarf you're not wearing at the time. The dangerousness is one side but there's also the bullying side. Neither are okay. What a dick.

SocialMediaAddict · 07/02/2015 06:52

What a total dick!!!

mathanxiety · 07/02/2015 07:04

Psycho.

I would make a report to the police just to have it on record.

I would also find new friends. Or just friends. The people you were with were not friends.

Hair goes up in milliseconds and you cold have been horribly burned on your scalp or face.

ILovePud · 07/02/2015 07:09

You poor thing that sounds horrible, what a dick and I'd revaluate your friendships with those people who tried to dismiss your concerns.

ithoughtofitfirst · 07/02/2015 07:29

So weird. He sounds like a psychopath.

FoxgloveFairy · 07/02/2015 07:30

Was this git's issue simply that you weren't drinking? Seriously? I bet he thinks he's the life of the party eh? Knob.

Lucy61 · 07/02/2015 07:34

He's a bully. Friends should gather round and defend you, not say you are overreacting. Get new ones.

Toounhappynow · 07/02/2015 07:35

He's hateful and a bully. Stay away and also wonder why they are his friends

ApocalypseThen · 07/02/2015 07:38

That's extremely worrying behaviour. He's now a dangerous individual and I think it's safe to assume he's caused serious damage yo a woman in the past. His behaviour has potential rapist written all over it.

I'd report to the police so that when the next woman he threatens or assaults does so, they can build up a picture of the pattern of his very disturbing behaviour.

Floggingmolly · 07/02/2015 07:38

I think I'd be more about your entire group of friends saying "it's only hair..." Did nobody react any more strongly than that??

ithoughtofitfirst · 07/02/2015 07:42

foxglove the issue with someone not drinking wouldn't surprise me. I was drinking on a night out before and a 'friend' repeatedly tried to force a drink into my mouth. I just left eventually and stopped bothering with that crowd. Whatever. They thought I was a sad loser anyway so I had nothing to lose.

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