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To think posting about your pregnancy on social networks is insensitive?

(210 Posts)
ivanapoo Sun 07-Apr-13 18:59:06

I don't mean the odd post here and there, I mean daily or more frequent updates/photos of scans, things you've bought or made for the baby, the "delicious" glass of Appletize you're enjoying, how sick you're feeling, how big your bump is, and so on ad infinitum?

Not only is it more boring than a parking thread on AIBU for all the friends in whose newsfeeds your updates appear, but for many women of childbearing age there's a good chance your peers/friends may be TTC, or unable to conceive, or wishing they had a partner to conceive with.

Almost as bad are the parents who detail every tiny little boring thing their child has done that day. I'm still waiting for someone to Instagram a picture of their baby's shitty nappy.

wonderingsoul Sun 07-Apr-13 18:59:56


ilovechips Sun 07-Apr-13 19:01:42

Either de-friend or hide from your news feed if you don't like it, people can write what they like on their own wall! YABU

LadyStark Sun 07-Apr-13 19:02:33


I mean, it's dull as fuck, but you can't expect people not to post these things just in case someone is TTC etc.

Filibear Sun 07-Apr-13 19:03:21

Message deleted by Mumsnet for breaking our Talk Guidelines. Replies may also be deleted.

Snoopingforsoup Sun 07-Apr-13 19:03:23

It is insensitive to those struggling, but then I could apply that to much of the bragging that goes on.
I guess people just get so excited and they don't think.

ValarMorGoolis Sun 07-Apr-13 19:03:33


Hide them.

It's difficult for you, and I'm sorry that it is, however someone else's joy isn't aimed at making you unhappy.

Iggi101 Sun 07-Apr-13 19:03:54

It is boring and insensitive. Hide them if it upsets you.

wannabedomesticgoddess Sun 07-Apr-13 19:04:21


Maybe we should all hide our kids in cupboards incase they offend someone eh?

Fanjounchained Sun 07-Apr-13 19:04:37

YABU.....and rather nasty if I'm completely honest, especially regarding the last comment about the baby shit. For some women, especially first time Mums, every burp, fart and poo is a wonderful thing. If you don't like it, block them. I know with DS I was in awe of him for about the first year but now that I have two I realise that not everyone appreciates this.

Do you have kids of your own btw ?

MajaBiene Sun 07-Apr-13 19:05:19

YABU - if you don't want to read about it then hide it.

You could argue the same about able-bodied people posting about their hobby of mountain climbing or something.

maddening Sun 07-Apr-13 19:05:42

The world can't pretend they aren't pregnant so as not to offend.

Where does it stop - you can't post about holidays and excitement about a new purchase incase someone has less money and can't afford hols etc <disclaimer : I don't post this stuff but people do and it doesn't bother me one way or another> - etc etc

Yabu - you can't censor life to risk offending. Although you might look a tit or bore others constantly posting it all.

KayHunt Sun 07-Apr-13 19:05:55

YABU. Everything we all do could be insensitive to someone else, we can't all worry about offending someone.

Hide them.

Tee2072 Sun 07-Apr-13 19:06:28


sjupes Sun 07-Apr-13 19:06:49

Nearly every one of my status are pregnancy related. I am happy to be ignored or hidden - my rough days/good days/ability to cook for the first time in 5 weeks/shopping sprees etc are boring as all hell i agree but it's my page and if someone on there doesn't like it then i'd expect them to ignore/hide me.

Raining on a pregnant ladys parade is not on - it's not their fault others may have problems.. it sounds selfish but wanting people not to post pregnancy related things on their own wall is also selfish.

AnyFucker Sun 07-Apr-13 19:07:05

I simply defriend boring twats like that

and yes, I would have found it insensitive when I was going through my own private hell of infertility, but that would be my issue

in fact, I am glad there was no FB back then

Still18atheart Sun 07-Apr-13 19:07:30

I can see where you are coming from but yabu

Fanjounchained Sun 07-Apr-13 19:07:37

At the risk of sounding insensitive myself (!) how can it be insensitive to post these pictures ? Unless a friend who is ttc has asked that you do not discuss your pregnancy or anything baby related, are you supposed to go into hiding if you're pregnant or hide your bump if you're expecting ? Where exactly do you draw the line ? I can see the argument if someone is being deliberately insensitive but when someone is simply in love with their new baby and wanting to shout it from the rooftops then just let them get on with it...

seriouscakeeater Sun 07-Apr-13 19:08:02

YABU hide the news feed.

SilveryMoon Sun 07-Apr-13 19:08:25

As someone who has had a few mc's I know it can be hard to see pregnant women and babies everywhere, but life goes on.
The world does not stop turning because there are people who struggle in certain aspects of life.
Should people not post anything about spending the day with their mum/dad/grandparents etc in case someone sees it who has lost a loved one?
I understand it must be hard to have things forced on you that might make you sad/upset/offended, but for the people posting, they want to share their joy and happiness.

Happymum22 Sun 07-Apr-13 19:09:38

I think sometimes people can go over the top e.g. photo of baby bump growing... but generally YABU.

If the things you described are all offensive and boring then surely most things are offensive and boring on FB.
How is such photos different to someone posting pictures of parties they've been to, a new house being decorated, holiday snaps, christmas etc.. and status updates about a new job, being unwell or your dinner. All these have potential to be offensive or upsetting, pretty much everything in life does. There needs to be a balance between being sensitive (e.g. if you know someone has recently found they can't conceive or has lost their job or whatever- don't post something related soon after) and the 'receiver' not allowing jealousy or small things to upset them unnecessarily and recognising everyone has fortunate and misfortune in their lives. The person posting it isn't purposely rubbing it in your face.

e.g. someone who isn't able to go to parties due to not being able to afford it or a caring responsibility.
Someone who cannot afford their own home or re-decoration, or is it showing off that you can afford it?
Holiday snaps similarly- are they bragging and insensitive to those who can't afford the same.
Christmas- is that showing off or insensitive to people who don't have the same family set up as you to celebrate with...

I think most of these are just life and people sharing news, exciting or funny things. Pregnancy is no different.


MrsBungle Sun 07-Apr-13 19:10:41

YABU. People are allowed to be excited and to write about it on their own FB page. Hide or de-friend if you don't like it.

DitaVonCheese Sun 07-Apr-13 19:10:41

I am shock that you think AIBU parking threads are boring!

I do understand what you're saying but YABU, sorry. Should no one ever post anything that could make someone feel bad, like about their partner or holiday or new car or new house?

The hide option on Facebook is brilliant smile

thermalsinapril Sun 07-Apr-13 19:10:44

YANBU. It's like those awful Christmas round robins, the information doesn't consider the feelings of the individual recipient at all. Nothing wrong with enjoying a pregnancy and celebrating etc. and hoping others will share your happiness - but ONLY if you are equally considerate to those who aren't as lucky in return.

KitchenandJumble Sun 07-Apr-13 19:11:25

YABU. And I say that as someone who has had to deal with the hell of infertility for many years. Sometimes it is very difficult for me to hear about friends' pregnancies, even though I am genuinely pleased for them. But I realise that my emotional response is entirely my issue. I would never want others to feel they have to silence themselves on my account.

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