Did you chose to take a lower grade job to protect your mental and physical health?

[AlwaysAFaithful]

I’m in a managerial position within a very high needs team - I’ve worked in lots of different places over the years and I have never encountered such a lot of difficult dynamics, people doing their own thing rather than pulling together. I have tried really hard to make things better but it’s been at a personal cost. I am finding it difficult to leave - I’ve never been defeated by a job before. I think this stubbornness is costing my health.

Have you been in a similar situation and made a move to protect your wellbeing? Could you share a bit about how it went for you? I need a sense of how much better life can be. I’m thinking of applying for something at a lower level just to give myself a chance to regroup. Thanks in advance for any responses.

Yes I've just done this. Where I've moved to there are prospects going forward to increase my earnings over time but my mental health has been saved, I have absolutely no doubt about that.

@AlwaysAFaithfulyes I did.

I took a very senior role to please the team (they wanted me to lead - the other candidate (internal vacancy) was disliked and they all said they’d leave if he got it) against my better judgement. Hated it, high stress, working 7 days a week. Ended up with an alcohol problem (needed a bottle of wine every night to sleep), high blood pressure and big weight gain.

I’m now on about a quarter of the salary (which I thankfully can afford, I realise not everyone could do this), nearly 2 stone down, three weeks sober with a “clock in clock out” job and I couldn’t be happier. I actually enjoy going to work and do extra when it suits.

Hope you find a way that works for you. We spend a lot of time at work/thinking about work so it can really impact you if you’re unhappy. 💐

Yes I used to be a deputy headteacher and SENCO in a primary school. My DD (now 7) has complex needs including Autism, Pica and learning disabilities. She attends a complex needs school and needs 24/7 supervision as she isn’t safe at night. Trying to balance the children’s needs at school with hers at home nearly made me very ill.

I now work in an Admin & Clerical role for community based NHS services and am much happier. I have flexibility in my role to change my work days if I need to and can WFH without it being a massive problem. of my DD is ill, I can take a day off to care for her with no guilt trips from my workplace. They trust me to complete my hours when I can and go out of their way to support me to remain in work which is hugely important to me.

I am much happier and it works better both for my family and for my health. I miss the teaching role and the salary but we muddle through as best we can.

I left a well paid professional job in the public sector which had become very stressful. One re-organization after another to save money and being expected to do more and more with less and less staff. And seeing people with less experience and skills being promoted over me because they had shitty little bit of paper I didn't have - a degree. So of course I was angry and jealous. I decided if you cant beat these people then join them. I did not go into a less stressful job however I escaped to uni for 8 blissful years of postgraduate study. The best 8 years of my life.

I would just point out - if it needs to be - that jobs on a lower level of skill are not necessarily less stressful. You can end up in s stressful job earning shit money.

I deliberately did not apply for management posts. I wanted to pursue my profession on the ground and try and do some real good rather than sitting behind a desk and going to meetings.

When I was 50 I jumped off the wheel completely and had a joyous 10 years as a freelancer in photography, youth arts outreach, running singing workshops and choirs, picture editing a magazine....

As you can imagine all this had an adverse impact in my pension but I got round that by downsizing to release capital and I do not regret any of my decisions, especially as I now have acquired disabilities. But I have lived!

My DH did this. Worked for 20 years in a huge multinational. Took voluntary redundancy when the opportunity came up. Now works for 2/3 the salary in a totally different industry. 4 days a week, wfh most days, no travel. He’s home to help the kids with homework each evening and weekends, free to work in the house etc. Huge improvement to work life balance and his MH.

I would like to thank each and every person on this thread for taking the time to reply today. It has given me some new perspective and also I feel far less alone.

I hope you have a really wonderful weekends ❤️

Yes. I left a managerial position for a civil service admin job. It gave me back my free time, my weekends, my social life and my overall health. I don’t want to manage people, and as someone said upthread, if the shtf, it is someone else’s problem. The financial hit was worth it.

Yes I agree.

It doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you or that you are failing.

It's your life, it should be enjoyable, not all drudge and misery.

I changed career direction when the current was taking me somewhere I didn't enjoy and didn't want to go. I stepped sideways into a related field and found myself full of enthusiasm again instead of feeling stressed and exploited.

I've always taken the view that those who are in well-paid positions who can't endure the stress of their roles (or in other cases, are not thankful for their salary) should stand aside so that other people can be given a chance.

YES - to the payday comment. DD at uni now - but we are managing.

I enjoyed my stressful job, and am bored by my less stress one. Swings and roundabouts.

I worked as a project manager for one of the big four accountancy firms. Ridiculous hours, travel, nights away from home and stress that was going to kill me. Eventually I'd just had enough.

I condensed my working hours and on my day off attended an RHS training course where I retrained as a gardener which has been a lifetime hobby for me.

After two years I left my job and had a fantastic year working in a fabulous garden. Oh my goodness the relief of being a junior gardener, no stress, learning all the time from really experienced and generous people.

After a year I started my own gardening business. Now I work for people I like, outdoors, doing something I love.

Only regret is not doing it sooner.

And you! All the best going forward OP 👍😊

My thoughts exactly. I think it's a myth that lower level jobs are stress free. Yes there's less responsibility but there's also often a lot of pressure to do the work being dumped on by incompetent middle managers.

"there's also often a lot of pressure to do the work"

according to the expectations of other people, sometimes multiple people with different opinions, and not being able to take account of your own experience and knowledge.

I did and I left the industry all together and management at the time too. Took a completely different role and started training as a counsellor. 8 years on. I am not working as a counsellor but I use what I learn3d every day the role I am in is now managerial. Though small team and I am looking for 1 more qualification (hopefully in March 27) and then I hope to be ready for he next step.

Its been hard but in truth I never regretted it. I left retail and I now work a 9-5 with weekends off. It's a better worm life combination and had better prospects for moving further if I want.

I'm in the process of doing this, starting a new role at the end of next month. I'm hoping to only work the hours I'm paid and I know upfront I won't have to work on my days off unless I choose to swap or take time in lieu. I got fed up with nobody listening and trying to run a function on fumes with no prospect of recruiting. Keep your fingers crossed for me!

Yep, I did exactly this. A high needs team and my whole function put under unrealistic pressure from the CEO. Found myself covering their workload to protect them from the toxicity.
I ended up on sick leave, decided to leave. 2 came with me (they approached me) and the rest have since left.

Plenty of jobs out there that pay the same or more that don’t require management of people.

Highly recommend it. I stopped managing people in April and haven’t looked back.

If you can financially afford it, definitely do it even just short term as your MH and wellbeing are worth more. It’s not failing at all and you may even find a new path. I wish I could afford to downgrade at the moment, I’m experiencing bullying. Best wishes.

I left. Got another role that was part time and a quarter of the salary. Feel better but I’m fortunate to be older and have savings and a tiny mortgage.

I’m considering this. I’m a hospital doctor, almost at consultant level, but increasingly realising that a consultant job would be impossible to balance with the rest of my life (mainly, my kids) and remain sane and healthy. I’m still considering my options but I think I will either try and stay at my current level, or accept that I need to retrain in a less intense specialty.

@Gwenna i am so sorry this is your experience. Hoping there’s a way out for you xx

Thank you again for all the sharing of experiences and perspectives.

wishing everyone a good week ❤️